Gary Small - Snap! : change your personality in 30 days

Gary Small, MD, and Gigi Vorgan

www.humanixbooks.com

Humanix Books

SNAP!: Change Your Personality in 30 Days

Copyright 2018 by Humanix Books

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Humanix Books, P.O. Box 20989, West Palm Beach, FL 33416, USA

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Disclaimer: The information presented in this book is not specific medical advice for any individual and should not substitute medical advice from a health professional. If you have (or think you may have) a medical problem, speak to your doctor or a health professional immediately about your risk and possible treatments. Do not engage in any care of treatment without consulting a medical professional.

ISBN: 978-1-63006-091-6 (Hard Cover)

ISBN: 978-1-63006-092-3 (E-book)

W E ARE GRATEFUL TO the many volunteers and patients who participated in the research studies that inspired this book as well as the talented investigators who performed the studies. Thank you to our colleagues, friends, and family members who provided their guidance and input, including Howard Chang, Stuart and Valerie Grant, Rachel Small, and Harrison Small. Special thanks to our longtime agent and good friend, Sandra Dijkstra, as well as Mary Glenn at Humanix Books and Chris Ruddy at Newsmax Media.

Gary Small, MD, and Gigi Vorgan

Note: Many stories and examples contained in this book are composite accounts based on the experiences of several individuals and do not represent any one person or group of people. Similarities to any one person or persons are coincidental and unintentional. Readers may wish to talk with their doctor before starting any exercise or diet program.

T HINK OF A PERSON you admire. How would you describe her personality? Is she outgoing, warm, or conscientious? Do you think of her as funny, confident, or generous? Perhaps you wish you were more like her in some ways.

Consider someone you dont care for. What is it about his personality that bugs you? Is he anxious, short-tempered, or unreliable? You probably dont try to emulate that person.

Now describe your own personality. Are you extroverted and popular? Would you say you are efficient and organized? High strung or moody? Are there any qualities about yourself you would change if you could? If your answer is yes, you are not alone. Research shows that the vast majority of people do want to alter certain aspects of their personality, and not just a little bit. Most desire profound personal improvements but dont even know that change is possible.

Personality defines who we are as individuals. It is a sum of the relatively stable traits that make up our unique character and is driven by our distinctive patterns of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Each of us has a personality fingerprint that reflects who we areour inner temperament that drives how we act and react in the world.

Experts in psychiatry and psychology have long believed that our personalities are essentially set from early childhood and remain consistent throughout life. However, the latest scientific evidence contradicts this long-held assumption. New compelling evidence indicates that we can change our personalities (either on our own, with the help of a therapist, or a combination of the two) and meaningful personality change can be achieved in a snapas little as 30 days. These groundbreaking findings have shattered the false belief that we are locked into our negative personality traits, no matter how much they hinder our potential happiness and success.

As you read SNAP!, you will gain a better understanding of who you are now, how others see you, and which aspects of yourself youd like to change. You will acquire the tools you need to change your personality in just one monthit wont take years of psychotherapy, self-exploration, or rehashing every single bad thing thats ever happened to you. If you are committed to change, this book will provide a road map to achieving your goals and becoming a better you.

Gary Small, MD

Gigi Vorgan

Los Angeles, CA

People always ask me, Were you funny as a child? Well, no, I was an accountant.

Ellen DeGeneres

E MMA FINALLY MADE IT to the front of the line at the bar and ordered a white wine. She had to yell because the band was playing too loud. She hated weddings, especially when she had to come alone. At 35, her parents and friends were starting to give up on her ever getting married. They accused her of being too choosy, but Emma knew that it was really just her shyness that always got in the way of making romantic connections.

She took a seat at table 12, her designated torture chair for the evening, and began calculating just how early she could make an escape. A couple of giggly women sat down and introduced themselves, but Emma couldnt hear them over the bands rendition of New York, New York.

After the toasts and before the salad, an attractive man from the next table came over and sat next to Emma. He said hello and asked her to dance. Emma avoided his eyes and shook her head. He turned and asked one of the gigglers instead. As Emma watched them walk to the dance floor, her inner voice screamed, What is your problem? He was cute and you are an idiot. Then she calmed herself by repeating her mantra of late: Forget about it; he was probably married or a jerk anyway.

Emma reached for her third dinner roll, but there was no more butter. She grumbled to herself, I should have stayed home.

Emma is one of the millions of people who suffer from excessive shyness and insecurity. She knew this about herself and accepted her fate. Sure, she would have liked to be more extroverted and open to new things, but that just wasnt the personality she was dealt.

The term personality is derived from the Latin word persona, which refers to the theatrical masks worn by actors to display various roles or to hide their true identities. Today we think of personality as incorporating an individuals characteristic patterns of thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. How we feel and think drives our behavior and causes us to act in certain ways.

Your personality traits tend to remain consistent over the years, and they have a major impact on your love life, career success, health outcomes, and even life expectancy. And although some of us may act in similar ways, no two people share the exact same character style.

Most people have a pretty good sense of who they arethey know themselves to be a certain way and behave accordingly. If you consider yourself to be creative, you probably do original things. If you think of yourself as generous, you are likely to be a giving person. If you believe you are overly sensitive, you probably get your feelings hurt a lot.

Sometimes its easier to identify the personality traits of other people than it is to accurately describe yourself. Think of a few people you know, perhaps siblings, friends, or work associates. You may be able to sum up their personalities in one word: Jim is bossy; Carol is intellectual; Sharon is temperamental; Peter is conscientious. Of course, one word is insufficient to define a whole person, but we tend to use these labels as shortcuts to determine how we will respond and act toward others.