Cristian YoungMiller - Everybody Masturbates

This book has been reviewed positively by Child Care Experts!

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EVERYBODY MASTURBATES

by

Cristian YoungMiller

Illustrated by

Andrew Toutant

RateABull

Books

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Published By:

RateABull Publishing

Copyright 2010 by Cristian YoungMiller

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The characters and events in this book are fictitious. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

Copyright 2010 by Cristian YoungMiller

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote brief passages in a review. For information contact Cristian YoungMiller at RateABull@gmail.com.

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Visit our Web site at www.RateABull.com

Book Design by Cristian YoungMiller

Illustrations by Andrew Toutant

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Dedication:

To everyone that was made to feel like they were the only ones doing it.

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EVERYBODY MASTURBATES

Boys masturbate.

Girls masturbate.

Monkeys masturbate.

Dogs masturbate.

Some people start to masturbate when theyre very young. Some people start to masturbate when theyre very old. Some people imagine themselves when they masturbate. Some people look at pictures of others when they masturbate.

There are people that masturbate in their bedroom and others in the bathroom. There are people that masturbate outside and others in planes but thats not good.

Some people only use their hands when they masturbate and some people just their fingers. Some people use toys when they masturbate and others even use food.

There are people that masturbate in their dreams and others while they sleep. There are people that havent done it since they were a kid and others that do it six times a day.

But no matter when you start and where you do it, one thing is certainly true--everybody masturbates. And as long as you respect yourself and others, masturbation is fun to do.

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Billy wasnt feeling happy. In fact, since having an argument with his older brother Tommy, he had been lying on his bed crying. Billys mom poked her head into Billys bedroom. But when she asked what was wrong, Billy just turned away and said, I want to speak to daddy.

In a few minutes Billys dad came in, walked right over to Billys bed, and plopped himself down like he usually did.

Whats the matter Billy? Billys dad asked. Did you have a fight with Tommy?

Billy was too upset to answer so he just nodded his head yes.

Thats ok champ. It will be alright.

No it wont, Billy said. It will never be ok again.

Whats the matter buddy? Billys dad asked.

When Billy looked at his dad again he noticed the wrinkle that appeared between his eyebrows whenever his dad got serious. Billy couldnt say it so instead he just stuck out his hands. These.

Billys dad looked down at Billys hands and the right amount of fingers and no scratches. In other words, it was exactly how eight-year-old hands should look. They look like perfect little hands to me, Billys dad said.

Thats how they look now, Billy said, feeling the need to cry again. But soon they are going to be all hairy. No one else has hairy hands and Im going to be the only one.

Billy looked at Billys dad and the wrinkle again appeared between his eyes. Why do you think that? he asked.

Because Tommy told me so, Billy said.

Billys dad sat up, looked away as if he was thinking and after a moment stood up. Billys dad then put his hands on his waist and announced that the two of them were going to walk to the park.

Billy liked to go to the park. And even more, he liked it when he got to do things with his dad without Tommy or his little sister Sam around.

When Billy got up, his dad stuck out his hand so that Billy could hold it. And even though Billy thought that he was too old to hold his dads hand, he did it this one last time. Billy figured that soon his hand was going to be full of hair and no one would ever want to hold his hand again. He decided that he should get the hand holding while he still could.

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Hey dad, can I come with you? Tommy asked as Billy and his dad crossed the living room.

No, youre going to have to sit this one out, Tommy. This trip is just for me and Billy, Billys dad said.

It made Billy feel good to see Tommy disappointed. And it made Billy feel even better that he was going on a special trip with his dad. Tommy was 13 and Tommy would say that 13 was too old to hold his dads hand. Billy thought of this as a hand holding only trip. No other way was acceptable.

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When Billy and his dad got to the park they took a seat on one of the benches. Billy really wanted to play on the monkey bars, but this time Billy felt like his dad wanted him to sit.

So why did Tommy tell you that you were going to grow hair on your hands? Billys dad asked.

I dont know, Billy said. But that wasnt the truth.

Tommy had actually told him that he was going to go blind as well. But Billy thought that his dad would be too sad to learn that he was going to have a son that was both blind and had hairy hands. Billy wanted to spare his dad the pain.

Did Tommy say that because he saw you doing something? Billys dad asked.

Billy was amazed. Sometimes he thought that his dad knew everything in the world. Yeah, Billy replied.

Did he see you rubbing a part of your body? Billys dad asked again.

Billy was amazed again. Yeah. But Billy quickly became worried, because if his dad knew about the curse, then it must be true. Billy looked down embarrassed.

No need to be embarrassed, champ? Billys dad said lifting Billys head up by placing his large fingers under Billys chin. Everybody does it.

Billy looked back at his dads smiling face. Billy was confused. There was no way that everybody did it, because this was something he had just discovered in the shower. He had been soaping himself when he had noticed that his privates felt really good when he rubbed it. But after rubbing his privates a lot his body started to feel like he needed to pee even though nothing came out. It had felt so good that he had done it the next night in the shower and then the night after that. It was then that Tommy saw him and told him that hair was going to grow on his hand and that he was going to go blind.

As soon as Billy heard that he went to his room to cry. Billy felt like a big boy, but the thought of hairy hands was enough to make anyone cry.