Lynne Stanton - Dirty Talk: Speak the Language of Lust

Now, now, dont play so innocent.

Youre not fooling anyone.

You know youve wanted to try it!

Sure, youre a nice girl, but theres no denying youve got a naughty side. Maybe youve even practiced what to say. Maybe youve gotten this close to actually whispering the words in your lovers ear. But somehow, in the heat of the moment, you find yourself tongue-tied. The words sound too embarrassing in your head. How could you possibly say these things out loud? Will he like it, you might wonder, or will he just think youre slutty? Or, worse yet, will he laugh? You find its much safer to just moan. Murmuring Oh my God is as dirty as you get.

Meanwhile, everyone from televised sexperts to mainstream womens magazinesadvises you to try it. Let yourself go, they say. Its a turn-on for both of you, they swear. Its empowering and sexy and fun. You believe them. But no one tells you exactly what to say or how to say it. Wheres a girl to start?

Well, first things first: dirty talk is good for you. (Say it with me, girls!) Its true! Theres no reason to be shy about something thats so positively beneficial. You see, besides turning you on, turning your partner on, and culminating in some much steamier sex (which everyone knows is good for everything from your complexion to your positive attitude to your cardiovascular health), dirty talk has a very important bonus. Its a terrific way for you to ask for and get exactly what you want in bed.

Chances are that youre the kind of woman who knows what she wantsfrom your dream job to that perfect pair of boots and you have some idea of how to get it. Why should your sex life be any different? From encouragement (Harder and Dont stop) to erotically charged instruction (I get so hot when you kiss the backs of my knees and Do it to me the way you did at that hotel in Memphis) to bringing secret fantasies vividly to life (Oh my, I wasnt expecting the electrician today Why, yes, the bedroom is right this way), you stand to get a whole lot more of what you wantif you just get used to talking about it. Its true, ladies: not only is dirty talk hot, but its extremely useful, too.

Dirty talk also gives you the chance to discover brand new turn-ons not only for you but for your partner, too whether hes a committed long-term love or a randy summer fling. Once you start talking to each other, you might unearth hot spots you didnt even know you had. Do you get all aquiver when he quotes lines from vintage erotica or the Kama Sutra? Does a whispered Penthouse Forum letter bring him to his knees? Or are you surprised to discover its the other way around? You might be amazed at the words that are sexiest to each of you, once you start exploring them. And all of this will be your own little secret. How naughty! What fun!

Now, dont worry, none of this tawdry chat means youre cheap. Remember, you can talk a blue streak in the bedroom and still be a lady in the bright light of day. Accept this fact now, or youll never be able to relax when the time comes to unveil your racy repertoire! In fact, one of the best-kept secrets of dirty talk is that you dont have to use a single dirty word, if you dont want to. You can describe a wild fantasy scene, a past encounter, an erotic dream, the particular acts you were thinking about when he was out of town, all in a suggestive and tantalizing wayin other words, good and naughty but with nary a naughty word. Youll see how. (Of course, if the forbidden four-letter words are the ones that fire you up most, by all means, use them!) Then again, there are moments when a well-timed oh please and your lovers name can be the dirtiest, and most effective, words around.

So, are you ready to start speaking the language of lust? This book will take you through it from start to finish.

Begin with tips to tackle your stage fright and ways to build your erotic vocabulary in Finding Your Voice. Get ready to start dirty talking deux in Sharing the Love. Then, take your talk to the next level in Ramp It Up by using our role-play ideas and suggestions for practicing your new erotic lingo outside the boudoir.

Let's dive in!

Section I
Finding your Voice

Don't worry; we're going to ease you into thisand, at least for now, no one needs to know. Learning how to dirty talk can be your own little secret, and like most secrets (especially if they're juicy), keeping your naughty lessons under wraps has its own benefit: it will give you an added dose of sexy mystery that simply wasn't there before. You might well find a new sashay in your step, a new boldness to your cocktail party banter, a new desire to show off that daring halter top. Yes, what youre working on alone in the evenings will stay with you all day long how could it not? You will be practicing a very sensual art, and that will naturally give you a very sensual vibe, right from the start. Youll be charging your erotic batteries, and other people will feel that electricityeven before you say a word.

All that said, however, you still need to practice a little discipline if youre going to learn to dirty talk with the best of them. Dirty talking is intimate, fun, and freeingbut in order to discover all of that, you have to do it! And you simply wont do it if you dont practice. Just like learning piano, French, or how to downward dog, you cant reap the rewards if you never show up to class. So dont just flip through this book and say, someday. Start tonight, on your own. Try the exercises that follow, and then repeat them. Get comfortable with speaking this new language so you can really do it with finesse! (And believe me, conjugating those verbs in Madame LeFleurs class was never this satisfying, nest pas?)

Spit It Out.

Theres no way around it-you wont know what to say until you know what words turn you on. So you just have to spit some out. Words, I mean.

The best way to ease into dirty talking with a partner is to talk dirty alone. As silly as it sounds, youve got to start by saying some naughty words when youre by yourselfwhen youre driving, soaking in the tub, trying on a new outfit, or hiding under the covers. Get used to them. Take ownership of them. It may be really weird at first. But the more you say them now, the less youll stumble over them later. In this way, rehearsing your smutty dialogue is no different than practicing a breakup speech or the keynote address at your high school reunion. Having a hard time choosing the words?