Cristos Samaras - Dirty Greek: Everyday Slang from “What’s Up?” to F*%# Off!”

Everyday Slang from
Whats Up? to F*%# Off! CRISTOS SAMARAS illustrated by LINDSAY MACK Ulysses Press Text Copyright 2013 Cristos Samaras. Design and concept 2013 Ulysses Press and its licensors. Illustrations 2013 Lindsay Mack. All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce this book or portions thereof in any form whatsoever, except for use by a reviewer in connection with a review. Published by:
Ulysses Press
P.O. No. 3,928,097.

Dirty Greek was written with the assumption that you already know at least enough Greek to get by. Dirty Greek was written with the assumption that you already know at least enough Greek to get by.

This is a slang book, after all, and you need to learn to walk before you can run. So if all the Greek you know came from above the front doors of the frat houses you used to stumble by on your way to your dorm, go get Rosetta Stone before you do anything stupid. Greeks been around for a very, very long time, so you need to spend at least a little time mastering the basics before you start cussing like a sailor. Its worth it though because you can really say some nasty shit in Greek. So Im going to assume that you can get yourself around the Greek language and youre ready to step your game up to a level usually reserved for downtown Athens after midnight. Having said that, its very important to keep in mind that even though Greek can be very expressive and downright graphic, its also old-fashioned in many ways.

For example, do NOT go try out the new slang you learned in this book on someone older than you, especially if you dont know them. That is the quickest way to make yourself look like a total punk. But after you leave grandmas house to go play count-the-empty-shot-glasses with your friends, then the slang will flow like wine or beer or ouzo. Start talking all proper here and everyone will look at you like youre a pompous douche. We dont want that at all, so Ive made this book as user-friendly as possible, with the focus on proper pronunciation, as well as context. Words are given in English, Greeklish, and Greek, and each is also used in used in a sentence so you can understand when and how each word is used.

The goal here is not just to teach you bad vocab, but to make you so comfortable with it that youll be able to call the meter maid a fascist pig or tell that smokin hot girl just how nice her legs are at the drop of a hat. Okay, enough foreplay. Take your Dirty Greek and get dirty with it!

Greeks been around for a couple thousand years, so theres been a lot of time for people to fuck with it. This means that Greek is not the easiest language to get the hang of. The vocabulary is huge and half the words are impossible to spell. vs : Like French, Spanish, Russian, and many other languages, Greek has two pronouns for you. vs : Like French, Spanish, Russian, and many other languages, Greek has two pronouns for you.

Theres the singular, informal (e-SEE) and the plural, formal (e-SEES). This being a slang book, the plural really doesnt apply, but the informal/formal distinction is a very important one that needs to be made when speaking to people, especially strangers. If the person youre talking to is in an older age group, say closer to 40 than 30, always play it safe and take the formal route. Leave out the slang too. If the dudes cool, hell let you know that you dont have to be formal with him. Pronouncing Greek: This is a pet peeve of mine; it drives me up the wall and Im using the soapbox Im standing on to shout my complaints.

In the English-speaking world, Greek is taught with what English scholars think is an ancient and therefore correct pronunciation of both letters and words. Never mind the fact that Greek scholars completely disagree with the proposed ancient pronunciation. But modern Greek is definitely not spoken this way. First of all, that alpha beta gamma shit sounds terrible by itself and a thousand times worse if you know how Greek should be pronounced. So, heres where were going to learn how to sound like a local because, believe me, nothing will make you not get laid quicker than sounding like a dumb American or English tourist. One important thing to remember is that Greek is spoken with an open mouth, meaning its a little more full-bodied than English.

Theres no twang and its less nasal than English. What this means for you is that when speaking, keep in mind that your mouth should stay more open and the tip of your tongue should be very close to the back of your teeth. It sounds weird, but it works. Take a look at the chart below and practice pronouncing the letters and their sounds for a little bit. Keep the mouth-tongue thing in mind, and your accent and pronunciation will instantly improve.

Alfa	Open up and say aaahhh
Veeta	V as in Venus
Wama	W as in wonderful
Thelta	Th like THe
Epsilon	E as in eskimo
Zeeta	Z as in zebra
Eeta	E as in beep
Theeta	Th like Thermos
Yiota	E as in beep
Kappa	K as in kite
Lamtha	L as in love
Mee	M as in moron
Nee	N as in night
Xee	X as in explode
Omikron	O as in oral
Pee	P as in pencil
Ro	Roll your R
Sigma	S as in sight
Taf	T as in table
Eepsilon	E as in beep
Fee	F as in fish
Hee	H as in whore
Psi	Ps as in psst
Omega	O as in oral

Diphtongs

E as in eskimo

AF or AV as in affect or available

EE as in beep

EF or EV as in effort or forever

EE as in beep

OO as in boob

Double Consonants

G as in garage

G as in garage

B as in bar

D as in dog

TS as in cats

J as in jump

Accents: I took four years of French in high school and to this day I have no idea how or when you use their accents.

And since French relies heavily on its accents, this basically means that I just cant write in French, regardless of the fact that I speak enough to not be called a stupeed Americen. Thankfully Greek accents are easy to use. First of all there are only two: and . The accent is placed on the vowel thats stressed, so you basically always know how to pronounce the word. Single syllable words dont need accents since theres only one vowel to stress. The best thing, though, is that even if you miss an accent when you write, its no big deal, because unlike French, Greek words dont have multiple meanings depending on where you place or dont place an accent.

Take a look at the sentence below and youll see how simple and informative Greek accents are. I rally wish ccents were this asy to understnd in ther lnguages. See how easy? Where your voice perks up is where the accent goes. The other accent, , serves to break up the diphthongs you saw before. For example, makes an e sound, but makes an ay sound as in

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