Gerd De Ley - Cowboy Wisdom

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Design by Carolyn Kasper Printed in the United States 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 CONTENTS To Cary Goosen,
my favorite cowboy INTRODUCTION N othing embodies the down-to-earth
practicality and old-fashioned work ethic of America quite like the cowboy. A symbol of a life lived according to ones principles, facing the best and worst of what each day had to offer head-on, they represented the quintessential American image of adventure and exceptionalism. In these pages, weve collected the best of their wit and wisdomthe jokes told round the campfire and the advice passed down to the next generation. The time of the cowboy may have passed, and the Wild West has long since been tamed, but the lessons learned on the range are as meaningful today as when they were first spoken. WHAT
MAKES A
MAN A
COWBOY A cowboy is a man who requires the help of a horse to outsmart a cow. Peter Darbo A cowboy is a farm boy in leather britches and a comical hat.

Edward Abbey C owboy: Someone who can replace a uterine prolapse in a range cow in a three-section pasture with nothing but a horse and a rope. Baxter Black I define manhood simply: men should be tough, fair, and courageous, never petty, never looking for a fight, but never backing down from one either. John Wayne A cowboy is a hired hand on the middle of a horse contemplating the hind end of a cow. Edward Abbey I wont be wronged. I wont be insulted. I wont be laid a-hand on.

I dont do these things to other people, and I require the same from them. John Wayne A cowboy without a hat is like a horse with wooden legs. Kamagurka O ne good thing about being a cowboy is that you just dont have time for golf. Texas Bix Bender C owboys are all so tough on the outside, but so sweet and soft on the inside. Amber A mans got to have a code, a creed to live by. John Wayne T rue cowboys are the ones who arent afraid to get dirty.

Lane Frost T he Cowboy is a patriot. Gene Autry C owboys dont go around breaking hearts. Missy Lyons A man is not born a cowboyhe becomes one. Carry Goossens C owboys never run, they just ride away. Anonymous W hen you side with a man you stay with him, and if you cant do that youre like some animal. Youre finished.

John Wayne A cowboy never takes unfair advantageeven of an enemy. Gene Autry F or a cowboy, courage is being scared to deathand saddling up anyway. Anonymous WILD WEST WISDOMS A dvice is like a pot of chili: You should try a little of it yourself before you give anybody else a taste. Texas Bix Bender A lways carry a flagon of whiskey in case of snakebite, and furthermore, always carry a small snake. W.C. Fields A lways try to say the right thing first thing after doing the wrong thing.

Texas Bix Bender A lways drink upstream from the herd. Will Rogers W hen a cowboys too old to set a bad example, he hands out good advice. Ken Alstad A lways walk tall and keep your head upunless youre walkin in a cow pasture. Texas Bix Bender A lways ride your horse in the direction that it is going. Carry Goossens A lways cross the river before reviling the crocodiles mother. Bill Tilman M y mother always said, Always keep your spurs on, you never know when youll meet a horse.

Maureen Malarkey B e wary of the horse with a sense of humor. Pam Brown A nd there was the cowboy who bought only one spur. He figured if one side of the horse went, the other would, too. Peter Darbo C owboys make better lovers: Ask any cow. Edward Abbey T he splits was invented by a cowboy who jumped out of the window of the first floor with his legs open wide, in the vain hope that his horse was waiting for him. Patrick de Witte W hen someone puts his ear to the railway line and the train is still far off, that is either a cowboy or an Indian.

If someone puts his ear to the railway line and the train is approaching, thats suicide! Jan Hertoghs N o cowboy ever drew his gun faster than the grandpa takes out his wallet to show a photo of his grandchildren. Peter Darbo