Louisa May Alcott - Little Vampire Women

C hristmas wont be Christmas without any corpses, grumbled Jo, lying on the rug.

Its so dreadful to be poor! sighed Meg, looking down at her old dress.

I dont think its fair for some vampires to have plenty of pretty squirming things, and other vampires nothing at all, added little Amy, with an injured sniff.

Being so poor, the Marches customarily dined on quarts of pigs blood, goats blood, and, on very special occasions, cows blood, but they rarely had the luxury of a living, breathing animal to feast on, and when they did, it was usually a small creature hardly more than a snack. Most of their meals had to be warmed over the fire to be brought up to the proper temperature, which was particularly humiliating for the young girls. Gone were the days when they could sink their fangs into a wiggling beaver, let alone a writhing cow. A human had never been on the menu, even when the family was wealthy and lived in a large, well-appointed house, for the Marches were humanitarians who believed the consumption of humans unworthy of the modern vampire. Humans were an inferior species in many ways, but they deserved to be pitied, not consumed.

Weve got Father and Mother, and each other, said Beth contentedly from her corner. She was the shy, domestically inclined sister.

We havent got Father, and shall not have him for a long time, Jo said sadly. She didnt say perhaps never, but each silently added it, thinking of Father far away, where the fighting was.

The war was the reason they were to be denied even a field mouse this Christmas. It was going to be a hard winter for all humans, and their mother thought they ought not spend money for pleasure, when so many were suffering in the army. That the suffering was limited to mortal men did not concern Mother, for her commitment to the human race was steadfast, despite the criticism of her neighbors, who found both the Marches beliefs and behavior baffling. Typically, vampires didnt concern themselves with the petty wars of humans. They had roamed the earth long before people and would continue to roam it long after they were gone.

We cant do much, but we can make our little sacrifices, and ought to do it gladly. But I am afraid I dont, and Meg shook her head, as she thought regretfully of all the pretty corpses she wouldnt get to eat.

But I dont think the little we should spend would do any good. Weve each got a dollar, and the army wouldnt be much helped by our giving that. I agree not to expect any gifts from Mother or you, but I do want to buy Mr. Bloody Wobblestones Scientifical Method for Tracking, Catching, and Destroying Vampire Slayers. which accomplished the task for you.

I planned to spend my dollar in new music, said Beth, who loved to play music on the Marches very old, poorly tuned piano. Mrs. March believed in a liberal education and strove to cultivate an interest in the arts in all her children.

I shall get a nice box of Fabers fang enhancements, said Amy decidedly. Her fangs, though long, were blunt and did not come to an aristocratic point like her sisters. No one minded the dullness save herself, but Amy felt deeply the want of a pair of killer-looking fangs.

Mother didnt say anything about our money, and she wont wish us to give up everything. Lets each buy what we want, and have a little fun; Im sure we work hard enough to earn it, cried Jo.

I know I doteaching those tiresome children nearly all night, when Im longing to enjoy myself at home, began Meg, in the complaining tone again.

You dont have half such a hard time as I do, said Jo, who served as companion and protector to their 427-year-old aunt. How would you like to be shut up for hours with a nervous, fussy old lady whos convinced every tradesman who comes to the door is there to slay her?

Its naughty to fret, but I do think washing dishes and keeping things tidy is the worst work in the world. It makes me cross, Beth said.

I dont believe any of you suffer as I do, cried Amy, for you dont have to go to school with impertinent girls who plague you if you dont know your lessons, and laugh at your dresses, and label your father if he isnt rich, and insult you when your fangs arent nice.

If you mean libel, Id say so, and not talk about labels, as if Papa was a pickle bottle, advised Jo, laughing.

As young readers like to know how people look, we will take this moment to give them a little sketch of the four sisters, who sat knitting away in the near dawn, while the December snow fell quietly without, and the fire crackled cheerfully within. It was a comfortable room, though the carpet was faded and the furniture very plain, for a good picture or two hung on the walls, books filled the recesses, chrysanthemums and Christmas roses bloomed in the windows, and a pleasant atmosphere of home peace pervaded it.

Margaret, the eldest of the four, looked to be about sixteen, and very pretty, being plump and fair, with large eyes, plenty of soft brown hair, a sweet mouth, and white hands, of which she was rather vain. A year younger, Jo was very tall, thin, and brown, and reminded one of a colt, for she never seemed to know what to do with her long limbs, which were very much in her way. She had a decided mouth, a comical nose, and sharp, gray eyes, which appeared to see everything and were by turns fierce, funny, or thoughtful. Her long, thick hair was her one beauty, but it was usually bundled into a net, to be out of her way. Round shoulders had Jo, big hands and feet, a flyaway look to her clothes, and the uncomfortable appearance of a girl who was rapidly shooting up into a woman and didnt like it. (Although her transformation to vampire brought an abrupt end to the growth spurt, the awkwardness of her appearance remained a permanent fixture.) Elizabeth, or Beth, as everyone called her, appeared to be an ashen-faced, smooth-haired, bright-eyed girl of thirteen, with a shy manner, a timid voice, and a peaceful expression which was seldom disturbed. Her father called her Little Miss Tranquility, and the name suited her excellently, for she seemed to live in a happy world of her own, only venturing out to meet the few whom she trusted and loved. Amy, though the youngest, was a most important person, in her own opinion at least. A regular snow maiden, with blue eyes, and yellow hair curling on her shoulders, pale and slender, and always carrying herself like a young vampire lady mindful of her manners.

Each girl looked as if shed been alive for scarcely more than a decade, especially Amy, whose pallid complexion could do little to mute her youthful energy, but they had all undergone the Great Change thirty-two years previous, which made them vampires of some experience. However, they were still considered adolescents, for vampires lived very long lives indeed and thirty-odd years was scarcely a fraction of it. Therefore, in all the ways that mattered, the March girls, although chronologically older than their mortal counterparts, were perched just as precariously on the edge of womanhood.

The clock struck six. Mother was coming, and everyone brightened to welcome her.

Ill tell you what we should do, said Beth, lets each get Marmee something for Christmas, and not get anything for ourselves.

Thats like you, dear! What will we get? exclaimed Jo.

Everyone thought soberly for a minute, then Meg announced, I shall get her a rabbit to feed on.

A squirrel, cried Jo.

A bunny, said Beth.

Ill get a little mouse. It wont cost much, so Ill have some left to buy my fang enhancements, added Amy.

How will we give the things? asked Meg.

Put them on the table, and bring her in and see her open the bundles. Dont you remember how we used to do on our birthdays? answered Jo.

Having decided how to present their gifts, the girls discussed where to buy them, for the only store on Main Street that sold small animals was a pet shop and they didnt know how Mr. Lewis would feel about providing tasty delicacies for their mother. Concord was an integrated town, where vampires could live peacefully in the open, but there were still moments when reminders of a vampires particular lifestyle could make the locals uncomfortable.