Lenore Look - Allergic to Birthday Parties, Science Projects, and Other Man-Made Catastrophes

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the authors imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental. Text copyright 2010 by Lenore Look
Illustrations copyright 2010 by LeUyen Pham All rights reserved. Published in the United States by Schwartz & Wade Books, an imprint of Random House Childrens Books, a division of Random House, Inc., New York. Schwartz & Wade Books and the colophon are trademarks of Random House, Inc.

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www.randomhouse.com/teachers Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Look, Lenore.
Alvin Ho : allergic to birthday parties, science projects, and other man-made catastrophes / Lenore Look ; [illustrations by LeUyen Pham]. 1st ed.
p. cm.
Summary: When second-grader Alvin Ho is invited to a birthday party given by a girl, his fear of everything causes him to dread going.
eISBN: 978-0-375-89498-5
[1. FearFiction. 2. 3. 3.

PartiesFiction. 4. Interpersonal relationsFiction. 5. SchoolsFiction. 6.

Chinese AmericansFiction. 7. Concord (Mass.)Fiction.] I. Pham, LeUyen, ill. II. v3.1 This book belongs to Charity Chen,
who had no fear of science projects or birthday parties ever.
L.L. v3.1 This book belongs to Charity Chen,
who had no fear of science projects or birthday parties ever.
L.L.

To the great Uncle Rob, who always buys the BEST gifts!
L.P. AUTHORS ACKNOWLEDGMENTS Be true to your word and your work and your friend. John Boyle OReilly, Rules of the Road,
Life of John Boyle OReilly, 1891 With heartfelt thanks to:
Anibelly Kelley, for taking Alvin and the whole gang to Vermont with her. LeUyen Pham, for drawing all the Phamtastatic pictures! Sophie Fisher, for her research and photos of the you-know-what at Orchard House, and Vivian Low Fisher, for driving her there. All the fabulous kids in my life who are always giving me lots of story ideas for Alvin, whether or not they know it, including Sophie, Sam, Bell, Buddy, Shepherd, Kevin and Andrew.

my name is Alvin Ho.

I was born scared, and I am still scared. I never thought Id live to see myself in another book, on account I couldve very well died camping in that last one. The good news is that I had the secret powers of my Batman ring and my rolls of toilet paper with me. They saved my life. The bad news is, theres still a lot of other things that could kill me, just like that: Giant octopus. Giant trees.

Giant anything. Monsters. Recess. Field trips. Karate chops. Pork chops (if theyre not well-done).

Chopsticks (if you fall on them). The kiss of death. The safest place for me to be is home, if you dont count the fact that my home is in Concord, Massachusetts, which is hard to spell. Its where the American Revolutionary War began, with lots of explosions and bad language and dead bodies all over the place. There arent any dead bodies out there anymore, but there sure are a lot of creepy dead authors who still live inside their homes, giving tours, instead of lying around at the Sleepy Hollow Cemetery where they belong. Normally, this isnt a big problem, like setting fire to the woods, its just an average problem, like having the match.

But today was not normal. When I got to school this morningsurprise, surprisewe hopped right back on the bus after A&A (attendance and announcements). Hey, its time for handwriting class! I screamed as the bus rolled down the street, away from school. I love handwriting class. Hooray, no handwriting today! yelled Pinky, whose handwriting looks like hair floating in the ocean. Yippie! Did you forget? asked Flea, who was sitting next to me.

Its our field trip day. Fleas a girl. Otherwise, shes okay. She wears a patch over a genuine pirate eye, and one of her legs is longer than the other, like a real peg leg. But shes still a girl. Field trip? What field trip? Ive been looking forward to this all week! shrieked Esha.

Me too! said Sara Jane. I love field trips. Im just not good at remembering them. The wheels on the bus went round and round. Scooter and Juless thumbs went up and down in a thumb-wrestling match. Then their fists went left-hook, right-hook in a boxing match.

Then Nhia, who is a ninja from Cambodia, slipped a head-hold on Pinky, who has the biggest head in the class on account of hes the biggest boy, and Pinky screamed into Nhias armpit, which made Hobson whack Eli on the head, which made Sam karate-chop Scooter with a loud Aiyah!, which made our teacher, Miss P, who was sitting at the front of the bus, turn around and yell, SIMMER DOWN, BOYS, OR YOULL GET A NOTE SENT HOME! How she knew who was doing what, all the way from the front of the bus and facing the other way, Ill never know. But shes very smart and smells like fresh laundry every day. Maybe she has eyes in the back of her head, just like my mom. The noise on the bus simmered down. When mouths close, something else is supposed to open, its one of the rules of school. In this case, it was Scooters lunch box.

Scooters dad is a cook in a restaurant and Scooter gets restaurant leftovers for lunch. And when Scooter opens his lunch box, people sniff. It smelled like cold fried chicken. It was cold fried chicken! Heads turned. Mouths watered. Scooters teeth sank into the chicken.

Juice dribbled down his chin. This made Hobson, whos a little roly-poly, yelp that he was hungry too, and rip open his lunch bagjust as the bus went around Monument Square, which isnt a square at all, its a circleand something went flying. I think it was raisins. Yes, it was raining raisins! Then it rained seaweed crackers! Then potato chips! Then my favoriteGoldfish crackers! Oh, I love field trips! The noise on the bus got louder and louder. Miss P was not pleased. She yelled, ITS NOT LUNCHTIME YET! But her voice got swallowed by the noise and you had to read her lips.