Chadwick - Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Husband

HARVEST HOUSE PUBLISHERS

EUGENE, OREGON

Unless otherwise indicated, all Scripture quotations are taken from the Holy Bible, New International Version, NIV. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984, 2011 by Biblica, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

Verses marked ESV are from The ESV Bible (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version), copyright 2001 by Crossway, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Verses marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version. Copyright 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Verses marked AMP are taken from The Amplified Bible, Copyright 1954, 1958, 1962, 1964, 1965, 1987 by The Lockman Foundation. All rights reserved. Used by permission. (www.Lockman.org)

Verses marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible , 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission. (www.Lockman.org)

Verses marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible , New Living Translation, copyright 1996, 2004, 2007, 2013 by Tyndale House Foundation. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Carol Stream, Illinois 60188. All rights reserved.

Verses marked MSG are taken from THE MESSAGE. Copyright by Eugene H. Peterson 1993, 1994, 1995, 1996, 2000, 2001, 2002. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.

Verses marked KJV are taken from the King James Version of the Bible.

Italicized text in Scripture quotations indicate authors emphasis.

Cover by Writely Designed

EIGHT GREAT WAYS is a series trademark of The Hawkins Childrens LLC. Harvest House Publishers, Inc., is the exclusive licensee of the trademark EIGHT GREAT WAYS.

Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Husband

Copyright 2016 Marilynn Chadwick

Published by Harvest House Publishers

Eugene, Oregon 97402

www.harvesthousepublishers.com

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Chadwick, Marilynn.

Eight great ways to honor your husband / Marilynn Chadwick.

pages cm

ISBN 978-0-7369-6727-3 (pbk.)

ISBN 978-0-7369-6728-0 (eBook)

1. WivesReligious life. 2. MarriageReligious aspectsChristianity. I. Title.

BV4528.15.C425 2016

248.8435dc23

2015030505

All rights reserved. No part of this electronic publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, digital, photocopy, recording, or any otherwithout the prior written permission of the publisher. The authorized purchaser has been granted a nontransferable, nonexclusive, and noncommercial right to access and view this electronic publication, and purchaser agrees to do so only in accordance with the terms of use under which it was purchased or transmitted. Participation in or encouragement of piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of authors and publishers rights is strictly prohibited.

To Mom and Dad:

Ive been inspired by your stories of our familys heritagethanks for leaving us such a wonderful legacy of honor. And for honoring each other through more than six decades of marriage.

To David:

Honoring you is not hardyoure truly an honorable man. Youre even better than my prayer list of what I hoped for in a husband. Weve shared great adventures and big dreams togetherIm thankful to be your wife.

To Bethany, David, and Michael:

I believe each of you is a world changer. Every possible career path seemed pale compared to the privilege and honor of being your mom. You were worth my best energyIm so proud of you.

Contents

M y new friend began our conversation quite innocently by asking me to pray for her marriage. We were both young wives adjusting to life in a new city. I didnt know her very well, but over the next few minutes, I would learn way more than I wanted to know about her personal life. And about her husband. She launched into a litany of all the ways he had disappointed her. She then proceeded to describe in detail how far short he fell in her eyes as a man. Before too many minutes had passed, this poor guy began to fall short in my eyes as well.

Many years have come and gone since that conversation. So why do I still remember it so well? Well, for one thing, I never could quite look at that guy in the same way again. His reputation, at least from my end, had been damaged by his wifes words. I made a mental note to myself to never, ever talk so casually to someone else about my husbands shortcomings. And I tried not to be on the receiving end of that kind of toxic spill again.

Now please dont get me wrong. Its not that David and I dont have our own flaws or that weve never struggled in our marriage. Were human too. Marriage is hard work and forces us to come to grips with our sin and selfishness like nothing else. No doubt, there are times in life when it may be appropriate to share your marriage struggles with a good friend or a wise counselor. But it was the disrespectful picture that my friend had painted of her husband that felt so wrong. So dishonoring.

And because this is a book about honor, Ive been taking a long, hard look at the whole concept of honor and its importance in marriage and in our culture in general. The word honor describes the value or worth we give to someone because of his or her good quality or character. Honor conveys dignity, honesty, and integrity. To honor someone is to treat that person with admiration and respect.

But honor feels loftier to me than respect. Weightier. It goes deeper and has to do with intangibles like virtue and morality. Courage and self-sacrifice. Even nobility. We may not know exactly how to describe honor. But like love, we know it when we see it.

And we know when honor is missing. In some cultures around the world, to be disrespected or dishonored is so insulting that its grounds for fighting. Some even justify the use of violence to defend ones honor or the honor of ones family. What started out as an urban slang expression for disrespect , dis, has become so common as to transcend culture or age. Most any child can tell you what it means to dis somebody, or worse yet, to be dissed.

Sadly, we live in a time when dishonor is so common that it feels almost normal. Over the years, Ive noticed that honor, especially in marriage, seems to be disappearing. More than once Ive overheard a group of wives criticizing their husbands to each other. Sort of a group-gripe fest. And why not? Its open season on men these days. You dont have to watch television or movies too long before you see an example of man bashing. I find this trend disturbing.

Maybe its because I live with a servant-hearted husband who is not only the love of my life, but also my best friend. Perhaps its because I have two grown sons and a son-in-law, all of whom are honorable young men. Or maybe its because I grew up with a wonderful dad who has been a faithful husband and father for more than 63 years. For whatever reason, Im bothered by how trendy it has become over the years to dis men, especially husbands and fathers. Seems like weve gotten too cool to appreciate the good guys anymore.

I pointed this out in a recent editorial I wrote for our local newspaper after the passing of the legendary University of North Carolina basketball coach Dean Smith. Along with great basketball, Coach Smith taught his players, including my husband, much about honor. David says that next to his own father, Smith was the most significant man in his life. Though the excerpt below is primarily about men as fathers, it begs the question as to why the lack of honor toward men today: