Bob Gresh - Talking with Your Daughter About Understanding Boys

HARVEST HOUSE PUBLISHERS

EUGENE, OREGON

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Cover by www.DesignbyJulia.com, Colorado

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Interior photos: p.45: Sechler family, used by permission; pp. 66, 84, 165, courtesy Wikimedia Commons

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SECRET KEEPER GIRL is a registered trademark of Dannah Gresh.

TALKING WITH YOUR DAUGHTER ABOUT UNDERSTANDING BOYS

8 Great Dates for Dads and Daughters series

Copyright 2014 by Dannah Gresh

Published by Harvest House Publishers

Eugene, Oregon 97402

www.harvesthousepublishers.com

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Gresh, Bob.

Talking with your daughter about understanding boys / Bob and Dannah Gresh

pages cm.(8 great dates for dads and daughters)

ISBN 978-0-7369-5534-8 (pbk.)

ISBN 978-0-7369-5535-5 (eBook)

1. Fathers and daughtersReligious aspectsChristianity. 2. GirlsReligious life. 3. Boys. I. Title.

BV4529.17.G74 2014

248.8'421dc23

2013031085

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To five of my favorite fathers

Jarrod Sechler

Dave Anderson

Pat Sullivan

Jim Burtoft

Troy VanLiere

five guys I trust to call me a knucklehead when I act like one (one for each knuckle).

Watching their lives has made me a better father.

And to Dannahs dad and my dad,

who love us like crazy.

Bob

Thank You

This book was a team effort. In the history of all Gresh books, none have ever taken so many people to pull it together. We were writing a book for dads that also needed to appeal to their daughters but would likely be bought by their wives. Need we say more? Weve done a lot of rewrites to get thisright.

Terry Glaspey, LaRae Weikert, and Barb Sherrill from Harvest House Publishers saw the ministry value of creating an 8 Great Dates book for dads and daughters. (Even though we all know moms buy more books.) They have a true heart for ministry and we love em.

Jarrod Sechler joined with Bob for long brainstorming sessions and wrote some of the content. (Youll hear from Jarrod personally in the pages ahead.) Another of Bobs friends, Jim Burtoft, gave us great ideas and great feedback. They are both true friends to me (Bob) and my family. They carry the load with me when it is heavy, and they are two of the best dads I know.

Suzanna DSouza was the editor for this project and also created a lot of the content. She kept us thinking like girls! (And with three dads working on the project, she was really outnumbered.) She was patient and excellent in all ways.

WHATS IN THIS BOOK

C aution!

As commentator Bill OReilly would say, Cautionyoure about to enter the no-spin zone.

Its amazing how political correctness intrudes into every aspect of our lives. Its even politically incorrect in enlightened circles to identify someone by such a limiting factor as male or female . Those in such circles see many more options.

We dont.

This book is written for dads and daughters. At times, it assumes that Mom and Dad are married. We believe that its ideal (and biblical) for a man to marry one woman, raise kids, and be married lifelong.

We also know that we dont live in an ideal world. Family structures are so splintered today that we cant address all of them, and so we chose the father of the intact family to be the assumed reader of this book.

We have a huge heart for single moms, single dads, and splintered families. My heart breaks over parents who desperately need a godly male or female role model for their kids. (We have included a special section in this book for single moms.)

Customize the pronouns for your own situation, take what applies, and disregard stuff that doesnt match your family.

The role of women in the church and at home is a hot topicand a complex one. Some women are girly-girls and some are tomboys, which makes things even more complicated. So

After much discussion (and rewriting) we decided that our model for womanhood was the mom of Proverbs 31. She was a mix of everything. (Her husband married well. So did I.)

Now, with that attempt to explain our approach in advance, lets go on some adventures together. Read on!

Bob

by Bob

W ere dads.

Were different.

We have different parts. We have different styles than women.

Statistically, we dont read as much80 percent of Christian books are for women and are read by women.

Ive made this book as easy to use as possible because your life is packed full of stuff, and I dont want to add any more weight (or aggravation) than necessary.

For years, moms have been using the Secret Keeper Girl 8 Great Dates books to grow closer to their daughters. Almost all of those books point out that the relationship a dad has with his daughter informs how she responds to boys. (I recently cheered on a fellow dad, Dr. Thomas White, the president of Cedarville University. He said this publicly: Mess with me, thats bad. Mess with my wife, thats really going to be bad for you. Mess with my daughterthats me being called to prison ministry from the inside! Of course he was jokingsort of.) Heres a quick look at whats going to happen in the pages to come.

Part 1: Dads MatterNo Matter What the World Says. This is an introductory welcome to the idea of dating your daughter. Well give you ideas on how to spend time with your girl while teaching her things she should know. Skim these chapters if you want. Dont skip them.