Debbie Danowski - Why Cant I Stop Eating?: Recognizing, Understanding, and Overcoming Food Addiction

Why

Cant I

Stop

EATING?

Why

Cant I

Stop

EATING?

Recognizing, Understanding, and Overcoming Food Addiction

Debbie Danowski and Pedro Lazaro, M.D.

Hazelden Publishing

Center City, Minnesota 55012-0176

800-328-9000
hazelden.org/bookstore

2000 by Debbie Danowski

All rights reserved. Published 2000

Printed in the United States of America

No portion of this publication may be reproduced in any manner without the written permission of the publisher

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Danowski, Debbie, 1965

Why cant I stop eating? : recognizing, understanding, and overcoming food addiction/Debbie Danowski and Pedro Lazaro.

p. cm.

Includes bibliographical references and index.

ISBN 1-56838-365-7

1. Compulsive eating. 2. Twelve-step programs. I. Lazaro, Pedro, 1956 II. Title.

RC552.C65 D36 2000

616.85'26dc21

99-086746

Ebook ISBN: 978-1-59285-754-8

Editors note

All the stories in this book are based on actual experiences. The names and details have been changed to protect the privacy of the people involved. In some cases, composites have been created.

04 03 02 01 00 6 5 4 3 2 1

Cover design by Terri Kinne

Interior design by Donna Burch

Typesetting by Stanton Publication Services, Inc.

This book is dedicated to everyone who suffers from the disease of food addiction and to those who tease them. May they all find their way.

Contents

First, the Facts

The Research

What about the Pills?

Just How Dangerous Are Diet Pills?

Are YOU a Food Addict?

Whos Addicted to Food?

Im Not Like Those People

Youre Not Alone

Finding Your Trigger Foods

Abstaining: Today Is Monday

Developing Your Food Plan

Just One Bite Cant Hurt, Can It?

No Means No!

I Need More Help

You Want Me to What?

Do I Get a Day Off?

Choices and Chances

Acknowledgments

A book like this is not the effort of any one person. There have been many people along the way who have helped and supported me in my work. Id like to thank some of them specifically: I wouldnt have been able to survive both the writing and marketing process if it were not for the unwavering encouragement and enthusiasm of my husband, Fred Danowski. His willingness to read and critique my work before anyone else, and at all hours of the night, made writing this book easier. And his honesty, even when I didnt want to hear it, helped me to grow both as a person and as a writer. Equally crucial is his complete faith in me and my work. No words can describe how much his support has meant to me throughout our nearly nine years together.

The love and support (yes, I mean financial too!) of my parents, Ann and Andy, were also critical in the development of this book. Their unconditional help, even when they were sure I should be committed for the choices I had made, was and continues to be the guiding force of my writing career.

Similarly, the comments and encouragement from my sister, Karen, and brother-in-law, Danny, helped to make even my darkest moments bearable. They helped me to believe when everything seemed impossible. Along with them, my niece, Melissa, has taught me so many valuable lessons about taking time to play and have fun. Our trips to carnivals and amusement parks have been an extremely important and enjoyable part of my recovery process.

My brother, Mike, and his wife, Denise, who supported me through difficult times and gave me hope and encouragement were another important part of this process. So many other members, both living and deceased, of my family also made this book possible with their belief in and encouragement of me.

My friends have also provided an enormous amount of support. Some of these include Kellie and Shawn Sharnick who listened to me when I needed to talk; Bev Robillard who read everything Ive written since high school; Liz Biles who typed pages in the initial book proposal; Dawn Rosner and Pat Myer for their skillful editing; Jennie Hendrix, Lisa Wolk, Rich Mayo, Sally Michlin, Paulette Day, Chris OHearn, and Mark Egmon for their undying encouragement exactly when I needed it most; Fred and Marie Danowski for their help during difficult times; my group of friends from Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays who gave me the unconditional love I needed to live; Charles Kurmay for making sense of legal issues; and Mike Greene for helping me understand the physiological aspects of food addiction.

Professionally, this book would not be what it is today without the initial guidance of Stacy Prince. Her patience and suggestions improved the quality of my writing tenfold. Likewise, encouragement from my coauthor, Dr. Pedro Lazaro, was an important part of the publishing process. The willingness of Deborah Coffin to support my work was also invaluable during the initial stages. And the honesty of those mentioned in chapter 8 provided valuable insight into the disease of food addiction. Though many chose to remain anonymous or use pseudonyms, I know exactly who they are and their help has saved at least one food addict from deathme.

This book would never have made it to press without the belief and support of several very important people at Hazelden. First, Jerry Spicers willingness to forward the manuscript to Darlene Gish, who developed a strong belief in the material, provided the groundwork for this book. It was Corrine Casanovas support, dedication, and skillful editing that polished this manuscript, but it was her strength and commitment that allowed this to evolve into a published book. And Catherine Brobergs skillful copyediting added the needed finishing touches.

I would also like to express my undying gratitude to everyone who was a part of my initial recovery, but most especially to Linda P., Phil W., Martha O., Linda B., and Marge P. I met them as an angry, fat, hopeless child, but with their love, support, and guidance, I found hope and enthusiasm and became ready to face a life I didnt know was possible: free from the chains of food addiction. Similarly, I am grateful for Pat Demeyan and Dolores Smith for their help in guiding me through life in recovery.

I would like to thank several people at Sacred Heart University for giving me the opportunity to teach what I love. Dr. David Curtis, Dr. Marian Calabrese, Dr. Louise Spence, Dr. Sylvia Watts, and Dr. Jacqueline Rinaldi have provided valuable guidance, support, and understanding throughout my time at the university. There is one person at Sacred Heart without whom I could never have written my first publishable word: Dr. Ralph Corrigan, who believed in my writing from the first minute I walked into his freelance writing class, has consistently served as not only a great source of strength but a role model as well.

And finally, there are no words to express my gratitude to God for the life and work He has given me.

Debbie Danowski

Introduction

Why cant I stop eating? It was a question I had asked myself each day for the last twenty-three years as I struggled desperately to lose weight. No matter what I did, it didnt seem to help. Overwhelming physical cravings dominated my life. I was powerless to stop eating, and I hated myself for it.

At 328 pounds, I rarely looked in the mirror below my neck for fear of seeing the massive rolls of fat that made up my enormous body. No matter how tight my clothes got or how severely my body ached, I continued to eat massive amounts of food.