Mark Woods - Pregnancy for Men: 101 Tips

Mark Woods

Pregnancy for Men: 101 Tips

Mark Woods

This first edition published in 2012 by Crimson Publishing

Crimson Publishing, Westminster House, Kew Road, Richmond, Surrey, TW9 2ND

Content in this book has been previously published in Pregnancy for Men Mark Woods, 2010

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Epub edition 2012 ISBN: 978-1-908281-63-0

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To Sarah and the boys, 101 kisses.

At last count there were around 230 million books (or something like that) written to help pregnant women through what is, by anyones standards, a remarkable nine months as they carry their first baby.

The times they are a-changing though and while as recently as the late 1960s and early 1970s the father of the soon-to-be arriving child was all but barred from the delivery room, we now live in a world where upwards of 90% of UK births happen with the male partner present.

Thats a very big shift.

Of course its not just the labour ward where men are becoming more active an ever-increasing number of us want to be involved, want to play our part, and want to really help during pregnancy and beyond.

I wrote Pregnancy for Men in an attempt to redress this bedside-table book imbalance that many fathers-to-be notice and it seems to have been worth doing.

But in a world where we are increasingly bombarded with more information than we could ever possibly know what to do with, the version you are holding in your hands aims to boil things down to the brass tacks.

Taking the 101 most pertinent pieces of wisdom from Pregnancy for Men all of which have been gleaned from our fellow fathers and an ocean of research and studies this book is designed for the man who has so little time, reading anything longer than a 140-character tweet represents a colossal undertaking.

So, flick, dip, do the lot at once and go back when the time comes however you read them, I hope these tips help you and your partner enjoy pregnancy and prepare you for the extraordinary and never-to-be-forgotten moment when you will be transformed from being a mere man, to being somebodys dad.

The NHS estimates that of 100 couples trying to conceive naturally:

• 20 will conceive within one month
• 70 will conceive within six months
• 85 will conceive within one year
• 90 will conceive within 18 months
• 95 will conceive within two years.

(If, by the way, youve added up the numbers on the left and are trying to fathom out why they come to 360 rather than 100, you should perhaps be asking yourself whether children are really a wise move.)

Many of the more popular brands of personal lubricant seriously inhibit the ability of sperm to get where it needs to go.

There are some special sexual lubricants on the market which claim to have overcome this problem, as it were, so its definitely worth a bit of research if you lube up when trying for a baby.

Make no mistake: your reaction to the positive pregnancy test result will be remembered, regurgitated and requoted for decades to come.

For the love of God, dont let any fear or anxiety you may be feeling turn into words at that precise moment. If youre feeling like the contents of your stomach have divided equally and are heading to both your north and south orifices, keep it to yourself and tell her later after the initial moment has passed.

Its an overwhelming thing to find out that you are on your way to being a dad and it has the potential to mess with your head for a second or two, but be positive and warm, shes probably twice as scared as you are and the last thing she needs is you screaming Shiiiiiit. Besides theres plenty of time to worry yourself sick later just enjoy this moment.

The three-month silence that many couples take part in about their pregnancy news is a far from universal or uniform practice.

Many people choose to tell parents or close friends, as much to gain early support in the tough first few weeks as the desire to spread the joy.

There is no right or wrong way of doing it, just what suits you and the mother of your child best.

The often-quoted figure is that around 20% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage, but this is increasingly being seen as a woefully conservative estimation.

Many miscarriages can and do happen without women even realising they were pregnant, putting the episode down to a heavier than usual period.

With that taken into account, the miscarriage rate is thought to be more like 40% or 50% with some experts going as far as to say that almost every sexually active woman will have one at some point in her life, whether she is aware of it or not.

Whatever the true figure is, whats for sure is that miscarriage lurks around the first three months of pregnancy like a menacing playground bully; probably never likely to strike, but always a threat.

Nausea and sickness can and do strike a pregnant woman at any time of the day, or even at night.

Its reckoned around eight out of 10 mothers-to-be feel sick at some point, with half of them actually vomiting. Symptoms vary wildly from woman to woman. The lucky ones will get the odd bout of mild queasiness, whereas others will be struck down by the severest, truly debilitating form of the complaint.

If your partner suffers from this, you are both in for a tough time. She will be vomiting morning, noon and night, unable to eat and drink properly, and even losing weight when she should be putting it on.

If your partner does suffer from morning sickness there are things you can do to help.

• Encourage your partner to avoid drinks that are cold, tart or sweet and to drink little and often, rather than in large amounts.
• If she eats small, frequent meals that are high in carbohydrate and low in fat she could avoid the worse bouts.
• Apparently if she eats some plain dry biscuits 20 minutes before she gets out of bed, it works wonders! This tip seems to get passed on from generation to generation and is, if nothing else, a good excuse to snack in bed.
• Avoid piping-hot meals clever one, this. Cold food doesnt give off as much of a smell as hot food.