Ben Stokes - Firestarter: Me, Cricket and the Heat of the Moment

Copyright 2016 BAS Promotions Limited

The right of Ben Stokes to be identified as the Author of the Work has been asserted by him in accordance with the Copyright, Designs and Patents Act 1988.

First published in Great Britain in 2016 by Headline Publishing Group

First published as an Ebook in Great Britain

by Headline Publishing Group in 2016

Apart from any use permitted under UK copyright law, this publication may only be reproduced, stored, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means, with prior permission in writing of the publishers or, in the case of reprographic production, in accordance with the terms of licences issued by the Copyright Licensing Agency.

Every effort has been made to fulfil requirements with regard to reproducing copyright material. The author and publisher will be glad to rectify any omissions at the earliest opportunity.

Cataloguing in Publication Data is available from the British Library

Jacket photograph Larry Rostan

eISBN: 978 1 4722 3673 9

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Born in Christchurch, New Zealand, in 1991, Ben Stokes moved to Cumbria with his family at the age of 11. He made his debut for Durham CCC in 2009, and just two years later pulled on an England shirt for the first time.

The highlights of his explosive England career to date have included scoring the fastest ever Test century at Lords and Englands fastest ever Test double-century. His bowling spell of 6-36 at Trent Bridge in August 2015 helped England to regain the Ashes. He has also played for the Melbourne Renegades in Australias Big Bash League. He has a partner and two young children.

Ben Stokes is not cast in the same mould as the vast majority of English cricketers.

Fiery, combative, gladiatorial he plays the game hard and with great gusto. He bats, bowls and fields at full throttle.

Whether its thrashing the fastest ever Test century at Lords, or the quickest ever Test double-hundred by an Englishman, or destroying the Australian batting at Trent Bridge, Stokes plays the game he loves with his heart on his sleeve and with 100% effort and commitment. Cricket fans adore him for it. Firestarter focuses on the pivotal moments in his life and career so far.

These episodes are vibrant, emotional, poignant revealing the man in three dimensions, red in tooth and claw. They provide a riveting insight into one of the most exhilarating figures in sport today.

To Clare, Layton, Libby,
Mam and Dad,
who mean so much to me

I cannot believe that at the age of 25 a book about my cricket career is going to hit the shelves who would have thought it?! This would have been impossible without the support and guidance of so many people who I need to thank.

As a cricketer, sacrifices have to be made by your family, and no one has sacrificed more than my fiance Clare, who has not only supported me through good times and bad, but also puts up with my mood swings especially through the summer. Most importantly, she has given me two beautiful children Layton and Libby who are my whole world!

To Mam and Dad, who drove endless miles across the country when I was younger for me to take part in training and matches and provided me with kit until I was lucky enough to receive a sponsorship. They also gave me the kick up the arse when I needed it.

To Clares parents, Jane and Arthur, for accepting me into their family, and for making it slightly easier for me when my parents moved back to New Zealand, knowing I had a back-up family here.

Neil Fairbrother has been my mentor, advisor and friend, and the whole team at ISM have been a fantastic support system. Without Harv at the end of the phone I might have lost my way.

Thanks must go to all my coaches at every level, especially Jon Gibson at Cockermouth where it all began.

To all the medical staff at the ECB and Durham, thank you for getting me through each injury, being patient when Im not, and putting up with all my complaining. You guys are the best at what you do and I appreciate you every day.

Thank you to my fans your loyalty and support has been amazing, you have no idea what a difference it makes. Cheers!

Thanks must go to my publisher Jonathan Taylor and everyone at Headline Publishing Group for allowing me to tell my story and making this book a reality.

And finally to Richard Gibson, who was so easy and amazing to work with, which surprised me as hes a Yorkie! All your effort (and trips across the Pennines) have not gone unnoticed. Cheers Gibbo!

Ive just f**ked this up, completely. Ive lost us the World Cup.

I couldnt believe what had just happened to me. What should I do now? How should I react? It wasnt as if I had any experience to fall back on. Lots of guys get asked to bowl the final over in limited-overs matches. But how many have bowled the 40th of a World Twenty20 final?

Not knowing how to respond, I didnt. I effectively did nothing. I remained still in the middle of the pitch. When the battle is on, my reaction is spontaneous I fight. But here the battle was over. I had lost. The fight had left me. I was empty.

Head bowed towards the Kolkata turf, hands over my eyes, elbows on my haunches, I stayed down. I did not want to get back up. Something held me there. In that snapshot of time, it felt like the entire weight of the world rested on my shoulders. Whatever entered my head was negative. How could anything be good? I had let everyone down.

When you are in a Twenty20 match, you are buzzing. As soon as its over, all your energy is gone. Its literally sapped. You tend to feel a little light-headed after every single match. But for this particular one, that feeling was ten times worse.

People will talk about Carlos Brathwaite hitting me for four consecutive sixes for the rest of my life. I can deal with that. What I couldnt handle was losing the game. Yes, there were 50,000 people inside Eden Gardens on the evening of 3 April 2016, and millions across the globe watching on television, but I thought not of them but the England team I had failed.

It was a kind of numb feeling. I felt hollow. My England team-mates were the ones I had affected most with those four deliveries. We had all worked so well as a group. So hard. We had become tight. A genuine team, with genuine talent, genuine aspirations. We had gone all the way in the competition. All the way to the tournaments final over. But in a flash, all that hard graft had come to nothing.

Of course, the other lads were there for me. I felt their hands on my back; on my shoulders. I was aware of their kind and supportive words. Yet, at the same time, I was barely listening. And I couldnt say Thanks. Actually, I couldnt talk at all.

All sorts of things were going through my mind. For the next three quarters of an hour, I had to deal with being the guy everyone was looking at. I had to come back out on the field, collect my medal and listen to all the speeches. I knew the cameras would be all over me, to see how I was holding up. I may have looked okay. That was an act. I was not. I was gutted. Do not show it. Keep your head up . Joe Root had said exactly that to me more than once as I crouched motionless on the square.

Later, as we sat in the dressing room reflecting on our defeat, I told Eoin Morgan that I had been more nervous bowling the last over of the semi-final than I was the final. That much was true. My confidence was high after doing the death job successfully a couple of times previously at this World Twenty20 tournament. Preparing to bowl against Sri Lanka and New Zealand had been infinitely more stressful. In the semi-final, I conceded only one run off the bat and took two wickets. I was more than happy to be in the firing line at Eden Gardens. I felt well drilled to construct the same kind of over as I had against the New Zealanders.