EMTINAL INTELLIGENCE
Change Yur Life and wn Yur Mind. Imprve Yur Scial Skills fr a Success at Wrk
KATE DAVIS
Dislimr
Kt Dvis pyright 2020.
ll rights rsrvd. This bk my nt b rprdud, r trnsmittd in ny frm ltrni, mhnil, phtpy, rrding, r thrwis, withut th prir prmissin f th uthr. It is illgl t py this bk, pst it t wbsit, r distribut it by ny thr mns withut prmissin.
Nithr th publishr nr th uthr is nggd in rndring lgl r ny thr prfssinl srvi thrugh this bk. If xprt ssistn is rquird, th srvis f pprprit prfssinls shuld b sught. Th publishr nd th uthr shll hv nithr libility nr rspnsibility t ny prsn r ntity with rspt t ny lss r dmg usd dirtly r indirtly by th prfssinl by using infrmtin in this bk.
TBL F NTNT
Intrdutin
H w d yu fl whn yu r tld tht yu rn't intllignt? Yu knw th fling, right? ky, thn yu hv th hn t shw ppl tht yu hv th pity t think nd mk sns f situtins; s thy n vlu yu. If yu disply sm wknss, yu nd up lking lss intlltul.
Th pst dd hs sn ris in th sintifi studis f mtin. Mst ppl hv lkd fr diffrnt wys t xplin hw th brin wrks, but thy sm t hv hit sng. W pr vr th dlit mttr nd nrvs t try nd undrstnd hw this mplx ntwrk f brin lls wrk nd hw w nd up thinking nd xprining, drming, nd imgining. This rsrh hs bn usd t find wy t xplin wht drivs us t lv nd t mk wr.
mtinl Intllign (I r sinlly Q-mtinl Qutint) is mr rnt trm whih ws stblishd in th mid-1990s by Dnil Glmn, mng thrs.
prsn with highr lvl f I bttr undrstnds himslf nd th ppl rund him nd privs rlity mr pprpritly.
Th pity t dsrib intrtins is ruil in businss, fmily rltinships, nd sil mmunitins. This hlps t rgniz bjtiv nd subjtiv prsptivs nd drw lin btwn thrtil nd prtil prinipls. Thrfr, I hs bm n f th rsurs tht llw prsn t hiv thir gls nd find p with thmslvs nd th nvirnmnt.
Thy lk t th dfinitin f mtinl intllign. W sk t undrstnd wht hppns whn yu mk rtin hi bsd n mtins, nd whn yu ignr rtin his.
Th bk xplrs th imprtn f mtinl intllign nd tris t bring ut th nntin btwn hrtr, md, nd mrl instints.
Th bk ts s rdmp t knwing th flings, but why ny f lif's grtst vnts unfld nd wht th univrs rund us is ll but. Suh wrnss lts yu hv th mtins undrstd nd wht t d nxt. Wh nds this Bk?
D yu hv n mtinl driv t d smthing? D yu nsidr yu hv t spnd tim t lrn npt bfr yu n tk mv frwrd? If s, thn th bk is fr yu. It is fr ths wh r n thir qust srhing fr wisdm t hiv mtinl frdm, it is fr ths wh r lking t imprv thir mtinl intllt, nd it is fr ths wh r lking fr gd rd nly t ris thir wrnss.
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Histry f mtinl Intllign Mdls
H rry nd Pt bth rgu htdly with thir bss. Whn Hrry gts hm, h strts t yll t his kids fr mking nis nd nt ging t bd. n th thr ntrry, Pt dsn't shut r srm t his kids vn thugh thy mk nis nd r nt yt in bd.
Whil Hrry rudly hids his kids fr mking mss f thir blngings, Pt kindly nd ssrtivly dviss thm t psitin thir tys in thir rightful pl nd rdy t slp. Hrry dsn't knw hw t dl with his ngtiv mtins whih r th dirt rsult f his mplyr's qury. Invribly h nds up turning his rg twrds his fmily, wh r in n wy nntd t th disput.
Pt knws his bss md him upst nd nt his fmily. Thr is n pint thrfr in shuting t his sn. It'll nly mk mttrs wrs fr him.
In th bv xmpl, bth Hrry nd Pt wr fd with th sm flings, yt th wy thy nvyd rltd mtin vrid drmtilly. Pt ws bl t distinguish nd ntrl his mtins diffrntly thn Hrry, wh nurgd his mtins t mk him bttr.
This is wht mtinl intllign is ll but. Bing bl t rgniz th flings f yur wn nd thrs, nd th bility t fftivly mng ths mtins nd rt psitiv nd njybl utm.
mtinl intllign (Q) is ssntilly th knk f priving, mnging, nd vluting mtins t rt th dsird psitiv rsult. Dnil Glmn rndrd th wrd fmus with his grund-brking bk f th sm nm in 1995. But Mihl Bldh first usd mtinl intllign s trm in th mid-20th ntury.
It is th bility t mnitr nt nly yur wn flings, but ls ths f thr ppl, distinguish mtins, lbl flings, nd lvrg this mtinl infrmtin t dirt yur thughts nd tins. This is widr nd mr gnrl dfinitin f mtinl intllign, lthugh thr r disgrmnts but wht it nmpsss within th sintifi mmunity. Th nsnsus pinin is tht it is tlnt invlving th idntifitin, prptin nd ngr ntrl.
Wht r mtins?
mtins tnd t dmint ur dily livs. Whthr w'r hppy, furius, sd, brd, r irrittd, w mk disins. W pik bhvirs nd intrsts bsd n th mtins tht thy inspir.
Dfining mtins
n mtin is mplx psyhlgil stt invlving thr distint mpnnts:
subjtiv xprin,
physilgil rtin, nd
bhvirl r xprssiv rspns.
In dditin t ttmpting t dfin wht th flings r, shlrs hv ls ttmptd t idntify nd rgniz th typs f mtins. Th dfinitins hv hngd vr tim:
1. In 1972, psyhlgist Pul prpsd tht thr r six bsi mtins in humn ulturs: nxity, disgust, ngr, disppintmnt, jy, nd sdnss.
2. In 1999, h xpndd this dfinitin t inlud vrity f thr bsi mtins, inluding guilt, ntiiptin, disgust, humilitin, nfidn, plsur, nd musrs.
Rbrt Pluthik dvlpd nthr mntl ding systm knwn s th "brd f flings" in th 1980s. This mdl dmnstrtd hw vrius flings might b mbind r blndd tgthr, smwht lik th wy n rtist blnds primry lrs t rt rtin lrs.
3. Pluthik prpsd ight ky spts f th mtin: hppinss vs. sdnss,
Indigntin vs pni
Trust vs disgust, nd
xitmnt vs frsight
Instd yu n mrg rtin mtins t build thrs (lik hppinss + ntiiptin = xittin).
Lts tk thr min mpnnts, dfind s th subjtiv xprin, physilgil rtin, nd bhvirl rspns, t xplin xtly wht flings r (hrry, 2019).
1. Th Subjtiv xprin
lthugh sintists gr tht thr r numbr f simpl mmn mtins flt by individuls rss th wrld irrsptiv f histry r trditin, shlrs ftn sy tht flings my b xtrmly subjtiv. Bus w hv wid lbls fr mtins lik "ngry," sd, r "hppy," yur wn prptin f suh mtins.
Tking vngn, fr strtrs. Ws yur vngn th sm? Yur wn prptin my vry frm mild mlsttin t blinding rg.
Thy dn't nssrily fl vry mtin in pur frms, ithr. Mixd flings r mmn in ur livs, rgrding spifi urrns r situtins. Whn fd with strting nw jb yu might fl bth xitd nd nrvus.
brd vrity f mtins my dsrib mrrig r rising by, vrying frm jy t nxity. Suh flings my ppr nurrntly r yu uld sns thm n ftr nthr.
2. Th Sil Rspns
Yu rgniz th mtins will triggr xtrm physilgil rspnss whthr yu'v vr xprind yur stmh lurh with distrss, r yur hrt plpting frm trrr. nd, s in th nnn prinipl f fling, w sns flings nd undrg synhrnizd physilgil rtins.) Sm f th physilgil rtins yu nuntr during fling r mditd by th sympthti nrvus systm, brnh f th utnmi nrvus systm, suh s swting plms nd rpid hrtbts.
Th utnmi nrvus systm invluntrily rgults bdy rspnss, suh s bld supply nd digstin. Th sympthti nrvus systm ntrls th bdy's rtin t fight r flight. Suh rtins will br th bdy t sp frm dngr immditly, r tkl th hzrd hd-n whn nfrntd with hllng.
Whil rly mtinl physilgy studis pprd t nntrt n suh utnmus rtins, mr rnt wrk hs nntrtd n brin's funtin in mtins. Th mygdl, prt f th limbi systm, plys signifint rl spilly in nxity nd trrr. Th mygdl is tiny rgn rltd t nditins f dsir suh s hungr nd thirst, mmry nd sntimnt.
Sintists hv bn utilizing brin sns t dmnstrt tht whn individuls r givn disturbing vids, th mygdl is triggrd. Dmg t th mygdl hs ls bn fund t supprss fr rtin.
3. Th Bhvirl Rspns
Prhps th finl prt tht yu'r mst mfrtbl with th rl mtinl sph. W xpnd muh tim intrprting th individuls rund us fr th mtinl gsturs. Th pity t urtly intrprt ths wrds is linkd t wht rsrhrs trm mtinl intllign, I, nd ths phrss ply signifint rl f ur whl-bdy lngug.
vidn shws tht rtin gsturs r similr, fr xmpl grin t signify jy r frwn t imply srrw. vn si-ulturl xpttins ply rl in mmuniting nd undrstnding flings.
