Ed Gorman - Breaking Up Is Hard to Do

To the Jackson family

Steve, Phil, Ellen

And in memory of Peg and Jack

Its impossible to make people today understand what the Cuban Missile Crisis was like for the average American, Russian and Cuban. Nuclear holocaust was very much a real possibility. And it could have happened at any moment.

Sloane Winthrop

Contents

October 24, 1962

One

Two

Twenty

For the tenacious first editor who Keeps me honest and keeps me laughingMindy Jarusek

He didnt call ahead for an appointment. He didnt knock. He just eased himself through my partially opened office door and said, Ive got a little business for you, Mr. McCain. I mean, if youre interested.

He scared me. When I describe him youll wonder what Im talking about. How somebody his size and his manner could scare me. Im no tough guy but I was surely tougher than he was. And yet I got spooked because he was so odd, so wrong somehow.

There was something unclean about him, dusty, that pale complexion, those dead grey eyes, the heavy black topcoat that fit him hobo-like. And yet it wasnt frayed or dirty. And the voice that wasnt much more than a whisper. Id heard that a lot after both wars. Men whod had their throats and larynxes damaged. He was a black-and-white photo in an old, old book come mysteriously to life.

And in case you think this spectral appearance took place during a window-rattling midnight thunderstormit was eight-thirty a.m. on a sunny October day.

He held up a small package the size of a cigar box. It had been wrapped with manila paper and sealed with Scotch tape.

Its an easy two hundred and fifty dollars, Mr. McCain. I just want you to deliver this to somebody.

Gee, Im really not a courier service.

I know what you are, Mr. McCain. I checked you out.

Im not sure I like that.

You check out people all the time.

Its my job.

Maybe its my job, too.

I nodded to the package. Whats in the box?

Thats irrelevant. Its nothing that can hurt anybody. Not physically, anyway.

And why cant you deliver this package yourself?

I have my personal reasons. He hesitated. He was a hesitant man.

He pushed his rimless glasses up his small freckled nose and smiled. It involves a woman. She He paused. He sat in front of the desk in my dusty little law office; maybe five foot five and 125 pounds and a sort of squint half the time. He glanced at the framed degrees of law on the wall. I dont think Ive ever heard of a lawyer who was also a private investigator.

Id gotten to the office early because I had to be at the courthouse at ten this morning and wanted to clear my desk of paperwork that was piling up. They warn you about a lot of things in law school but somehow they never get around to paperwork.

He sat. He squinted. He sniffled. He said, Allergies.

Ah.

Hed brought in a briefcase, which he now lifted and sat on his lap. He opened it, delved inside and pulled out what appeared to be an 8 x 11 black-and-white glossy photograph like those that celebrities hand out. Somewhere in a box I have several glossies like that of Gene Autry and Roy Rogers. Theyre autographed. I have a glossy of Lassie, too. She didnt autograph hers.

He handed me the photograph. I looked at it and said, You ever see the movie Laura?

Many times. And I know just what youre going to say.

You do?

Of course. You looked at her just now for the first time and youre intrigued. Just the way Dana Andrews was intrigued.

I smiled. A movie fan.

Very much so.

Who is she?

It doesnt matter.

Then why show me the photo?

I wanted you to see who youd be delivering the package to.

I havent agreed to deliver anything yet. Whats in the package doesnt matter and she doesnt matter.

Id have to know more than that.

His eyes scanned my office again. No offense, Mr. McCain, but you dont look awfully successful.

I pay my bills every month.

You can use the money. And for the money Im offering, youd be foolish to turn it down. And in checking you out, I didnt get the impression youre foolish.

I was thinking of what I could do with the money. It represented about a third of my monthly income. I didnt care for him or the reason he wanted to hire me but delivering a package probably couldnt get me in a whole lot of trouble.

You couldnt deliver it yourself, huh?

Itd be more dramatic if somebody else delivered it.

Western Uniond be a lot cheaper than two hundred and fifty dollars.

Western Unionanybody can use Western Union. This has to be special, Mr. McCain. Youre a movie fan. I dont have to tell you how a dramatic gesture can get to a woman.

She break your heart, did she?

He laughed. It was an unpleasant sound somehow. Something like that. He tapped the box. She goes out during the day but you can catch her at home tonight.

She works?

Yes, but Im not sure where. Thats why night is safer.

I stood up. Whats your name?

Hastings.

You have a first name?

You know you need the money, Mr. McCain.

I snapped my finger. Peter Lorre.

I used to consider that an insult. The older I get, I dont mind so much. Better I remind you of a movie star than just some nobody. Then: Im in a hurry, Mr. McCain. He stood up, closed his briefcase. Extracted from his overcoat a white number 10 envelope. No writing on the front. Twelve twenties and two fives. He shoved the envelope over to me.

I stared at it and then picked it up.

He said, I need it delivered tonight, Mr. McCain. He pulled his briefcase from the desk. Walked to the door. Youve made me want to see Laura again. Too bad its not showing somewhere around here.

Then he was gone. I picked up the envelope and counted the money, way too much money for so little work. Way too much.

ALL WE CAN DO is plead guilty and hope for the best, Lumir.

Tell er I was framed.

Thats crazy, Lumir, I said. You were driving drunk. And you were alone. How could I say you were framed?

Maybe somebody slipped somethin in my drink.

Cmon, Lumir. We dont want to screw around. This is your second drunken driving charge.

I seen this here show on the TV.

Uh-huh.

Where they claimed this guy went bat-shit for a while and couldnt be held responsible. Whats that called?

I think you had it right, Lumir. I think thats the technical term for it. Going bat-shit.

Lumir of the sleeveless catsup-and-mustard-stained T-shirt said, It is?

Temporary insanity is what its called, Lumir. And we dont have a chance. Now shut up and lets go inside.

You tell me tshut up one more time, McCain, and Im gonna throw you through a window.

And here I was going to invite you to my birthday party, Lumir. My mom said I could invite all my extra-special friends. When youre the least successful lawyer in town, you usually get the dregs for clients. Lumir hadnt worked up to the dreg level yet. He still had miles to go before he slept.

I tried to walk off my time with Lumir. My little town has a good number of nooks and crannies dating back to the time when the Mesquakie Indians still roamed the prairies and when Thanksgiving was a communal feast in the Presbyterian church. There was, believe it or not, some peremptory coal mining, so a short-haul railroad was built, the roundhouse of which is now the town market; and there was a blacksmiths barn so big that they had square dances there twice a month. The barn had been refurbished a couple times since it had been built. We wanted to hang on to it.

Two blocks from my office I saw Abe Leifer suddenly tap his chest and sit down quickly on the edge of a bus bench. Abe is the State Farm insurance agent. Hes handled my familys insurance since the day my older brothernow alas long deadwas born.