Marsha Aizumi - Two Spirits, One Heart

Praise for Two Spirits, One Heart

Marsha Aizumis Two Spirits, One Heart is a moving memoir of facing ones fears while traveling down unknown, fearsome paths. We recommend this book to all parents. Each of us can enrich our lives by learning about this remarkable story of courage, fear, and understanding. This authors eloquence allowed us to share in her great adventure by walking in her shoes with her son, Aiden. You will experience, as we did, her triumphs and tears.

Harold and Ellen Kameya, Founders

L.A. Asian Pacific Islander

Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG)

Two Spirits, One Heart is a powerful account of a mothers love during the transition of her daughters sexual transformation into a beloved son. This marvelously written autobiography captures the personal anguish and triumphs of their journey together and allows the reader to experience and understand the bravery, pain and acceptance gender change requires. Thank you, Marsha, you touched my heart.

Karen Jorgensen Burstein, Author

What a Woman Wants and Pay for Results

Its not a story about losing a daughter or gaining a son; its about a mothers unconditional love and acceptance of her child. Its about a mother and childs journey together towards understanding and embracing truth beyond societys boundaries and expectations regarding gender identity and expression. It will make you feel empowered to be yourself, to be an ally, and to be a supportive mother, father, parent, or guardian to your transgender child who is most importantly, still your child.

Phoenix Schneider

MSW, Mentor, Activist, Program Director

The Trevor Project

Two Spirits, One Heart is an honest and open look into a mothers heart and mind on the journey with her childs transition from female to male. Marsha and Aidens story is one of struggle, compassion and the real meaning of unconditional love.

Terry Stone, Executive Director

Centerlink: The Community of LGBT Centers

All too often, we see appalling cases of LGBTQ youth who suffer immensely because they have been marginalized or rejected by their own family members. Marshas personal account of providing unconditional love and support to her trans son before, during and after his transition is truly inspiring. A must read for any loving parent who is struggling with the gender identity or sexual orientation of their own child.

Darrin Wilstead

Mentoring & Alumni Program Director

Point Foundation

Since I met Marsha, I have been astounded by the love she feels for Aiden. I can only think how fortunate Aidens spirits are to have a mother that so nurtured them and instilled the courage to be himself. They are beautiful together, their family is beautiful, and this book is so important at a time of such polarization in our society around identity. I wish this were required reading for every parent as it is a roadmap to acceptance, compassion, and unconditional love for ones child no matter who or what they turn out to be.

Michael Ferrera, Director

LifeWorks at the L.A. Gay & Lesbian Center

This is Marsha and Aidens courageous story of inspiration, tenacity and hope. It provided us with a deeper understanding about the spirit of a boy who never gave up and a mother whose unwavering love and acceptance provided the ability for that spirit to take flight. This book also illustrates the passion it takes to find your way and the compassion it takes to support that journey.

John and Joan Hall, Founders

Opportunities for Learning Public Charter Schools

As a physician, I was so deeply moved by Aidens coming out letter to his family and friends that I asked his permission to share it with another patient unable to express himself so elegantly. As a mother, I was once again moved to tears by the eloquence of Marshas raw emotions and unconditional love for her son. This is an inspirational book that should be mandatory reading for all high school, college, and medical students.

M. Kathleen Jones, M.D.

Marsha Aizumis candid account of her journey toward acceptance and eventual celebration of her transgender child is a spiritual odyssey that has universal resonance. It is one that speaks to the human desire for wholeness and authenticity. Her story poignantly illustrates the spiritual wisdom that beyond the labels lesbian, FTM, and Asian lies a child that longs for the unconditional love of a mother.

Rev. Dr. Jonipher Kwong

First Unitarian Church of Hawaii

Two Spirits, One Heart

A Mother, Her Transgender Son,

and Their Journey to Love and Acceptance

MARSHA AIZUMI

WITH AIDEN AIZUMI

Copyright 2012 by Marsha and Aiden Aizumi

Magnus Books, an Imprint of Riverdale Avenue Books

5676 Riverdale Avenue, Suite 101

Bronx, NY 10471

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, without permission in writing from the publisher.

Printed in the United States of America

First Magnus Books edition, 2013

First published by Peony Press, 2012

Cover by: Linda Kosarin, The Art Department

Print ISBN: 978-1-936833-18-4

Digital ISBN: 978-1-936833-20-7

www.riverdaleavebooks.com

This book is dedicated to the four people who have been an integral part of my incredible journey: my son Aiden, who courageously asked me to stand by his side and travel down this amazing road together; my son Stefen, whose unconditional love for his brother serves as a model for me of what true acceptance can be; my future daughter, Mary, who brought love back into Aidens life; and to my husband, Tad, the rock of our family and the love of my life.

M.A.

To Mary, my best friend and the one I love the most; to my brother, Stefen, for always taking the Little Mermaid sleeping bag; to Uncle Bob and Auntie Bonnie, for just loving me; and to Papa and Momma, for first loving Ashley, then loving me even more.

A.A.

Part One: Ashley

Part Two: Aiden

For as long as I can remember, my life has been grounded in the concept of living the life you dream. I pursued my dream when I adopted my two children from Japan. I retired to live my dream when I sold my insurance business and became a stay-at-home mother. And as I began to write this book, I dreamed of creating a safer world for both of my sons.

When I talk to my children about their future, I always tell them to follow their dreams. Even if the dream may not be realized, I believe that they are being led in the direction of their hearts desire. Perhaps they will meet someone who will teach them a valuable lesson or introduce them to an individual who will impact them in a positive way. I no longer ignore signs that appear more frequently and grow in intensity. I listen to the voice inside my head that feels in alignment with my heart. This is how I strive to live my life and this is how I have raised my children.

My oldest child was born female, but today he lives as a man. According to Native American belief, he has two spirits. His dream was to live in alignment with how he thinks and feels as a man. For years, this was his ongoing struggle.

Together, my son and I represent two separate spirits: a mother and her child. Aiden has faced his journey as he reconciled who he was meant to be. I faced a journey as well, choosing to be the mother I was meant to be. And we have faced a journey together as he traveled down the road of transition and became the person that lives inside of him. It has been a difficult journey for both of us and for our family. We have had to confront more fear and doubt than each of us thought possible. But someone once told me that fear backs down when standing in the face of love, and no truer words were ever spoken with respect to our journey.