Johnson - A man in the making: strategies to help your son succeed in life

Over the years it has been my personal mission to advocate the importance of men and fathers in families, within communities, and around the world. I truly believe God anointed me with that message and has given me the ability and vehiclesmy books and speaking ministryto share it.

Because of my background, I have always been fascinated with what authentic masculinity looks like, its power to influence, and how it is acquired or transferred during the transition from boyhood to manhood.

After years of research, observation and study, real-life experiences, and operating ministry programs (such as mentoring fatherless boys, leading father-son campouts, and working with men in virtually every venue from churches to prisons), I have come to the conclusion that healthy masculinity is a somewhat fragile gift that must be intentionally passed down from one generation of men to the next. Any misstep or break in that transference can lead to a corruption of the process, resulting in skewed and damaged men. And damaged men typically do not make good leaders, husbands, or fathers.

Early last year I was convicted by God that while I was reaching thousands, perhaps tens of thousands, of men and boys each year with my books and my speaking ministry, my influence in their lives was somewhat wide and shallow. Even though I want to continue those efforts, I was compelled to start sharing my experience and knowledge through a deeper but narrower focus by individually mentoring young men. While I initially entered into that endeavor with some trepidation, it has turned out to be a truly invigorating experience. I currently mentor a young man from Nigeria in his mid-twenties whose parents were tragically killed when he was seventeen. His eagerness to learn about what it means to be a man and a leader has blessed me as much or more than our work together has benefited him. It has caused me to actually think about the process of becoming a healthy man and what teachings and experiences are important to be included in that process.

This experience has reinforced my belief that it requires a plan and a good deal of intentionality to effectively raise a boy to become a healthy man and leader. Without a plan and intentional effort, we settle for whatever we get. Let me give you an example. I married my wife because, not only was she incredibly hot looking, but shes such a fantastic cook that she could cook my garbage and make it taste good. But because of that, she doesnt always follow a recipe (a plan) for the meals she cooks. Most of the time this works out great and we have an excellent meal. Every so often, however, things dont quite work out as well as they could have. Thankfully, Ill eat about anything as long as it has meat in it, so it hasnt ever been too big of an issue. But her proficiency in her cooking abilities sometimes encourages her to be overconfident, and the result sometimes leaves something to be desired. In other words, her meals in those rare circumstances do not reach their full potential.