Praise for S.E.X.
S.E.X. is, literally, a lifesaving book: Corinnas vast commonsense wisdomespecially on topics relating to gender roles, queer sexuality, and gender identitieshas the potential to improve the physical and emotional health of anyone who reads it, and to help heal our cultures unhealthy, conflicted approaches to sex, sexuality, and gender.
Lisa Jervis, cofounder, Bitch
Sexpert Heather Corinna is the big sis you wish youd had when you were a confused, pimply teen.... Geared towards 1622-year-olds of any gender, S.E.X. covers the nuts and bolts of anatomy in a tone thats conversational, not cutesy... its her holistic approach and deft handling of other heavy topics, from eating disorders to abuse, that make this book a must-read.
BUST
If youre a parent looking for an accurate and non-judgmental text for your blossoming adolescent, or a blossoming adolescent or twenty-something yourself, here it is.
Toronto Star
S.E.X. is a positive and informative all-embracing guide to sexuality by a dedicated author. Heather Corinna challenges adolescents and young adults alike to be proactive in owning their sexuality by being true to themselves, all the while laying the foundation of knowledge and acceptancekey factors for the development of a healthy sexuality.
DR. LYNN PONTON, author of The Sex Lives of Teenagers and The Romance of Risk
Many of the designations used by manufacturers and sellers to distinguish their products are claimed as trademarks. Where those designations appear in this book and Da Capo Press was aware of a trademark claim, the designations have been printed in initial capital letters.
Copyright 2016 by Heather Corinna
Illustrations by Isabella Rotman
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the publisher. Printed in the United States of America. For information, address Da Capo Press, 44 Farnsworth Street, 3rd Floor, Boston, MA 02210.
Designed by Jill Shaffer
Set in 11 point Bembo and 9.5 point Helvetica Neue LT by Eclipse Publishing Services
Cataloging-in-Publication data for this book is available from the Library of Congress.
ISBN: 978-0-7382-1885-4 (ebook)
Second Da Capo Press edition 2016
Published by Da Capo Press, an imprint of Perseus Books, a division PBG Publishing, LLC, a subsidiary of Hachette Book Group, Inc.
www.dacapopress.com
Note: The information in this book is true and complete to the best of our knowledge. This book is intended only as an informative guide for those wishing to know more about health issues. In no way is this book intended to replace, countermand, or conflict with the advice given to you by your own physician. The ultimate decision concerning care should be made between you and your doctor. We strongly recommend you follow his or her advice. Information in this book is general and is offered with no guarantees on the part of the authors or Da Capo Press. The authors and publisher disclaim all liability in connection with the use of this book.
Da Capo Press books are available at special discounts for bulk purchases in the U.S. by corporations, institutions, and other organizations. For more information, please contact the Special Markets Department at 2300 Chestnut Street, Suite 200, Philadelphia, PA, 19103, or call (800) 810-4145, ext. 5000, or e-mail .
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
For young people:
At Scarleteen, at the Spruce Street Inn Secure Crisis Residential Center, all the way back to the little preschool I ran in Rogers Park in the mid-1990s, and in many other settings and interactions, I have learned so much about not just this work but about life, love, and living itself from young people. My life has been more rich, meaningful, and unique for all of your places and parts in it than it ever could have been without all of you: thank you. I hope this book gives you back at least as much as all youve given me.
For the Liams:
Before you know it, itll be time in your lives for a book like this one. When it is, I hope you like it and only go Eew! as many times as its fun. Know that you can talk with your Aunt Heather about any of this stuff anytime: I promise to only be as silly about any of it as you are.
Contents
From idea to bookshelf, the process of riffing, writing, proposing, researching, writing some more, editing, surveying, and then researching again, rewriting, editing again, shopping, shopping again, and then researching yet again, and editing once more (with feeling!) took nearly six years. And now, almost a decade since the first edition, theres been yet another big process in revising and updating this book.
There were a lot of people in that many years of work and there isnt anything close to enough paper to thank all of them properly. Those who cannot fit into these few pages still have real estate in my heart. To all of you, my humblest thanks and deepest gratitude. I am incredibly lucky to have a wide, caring, and supportive network of family, friends, colleagues, co-learners, and supporters with so much faith in me. Im one lucky ducky to have had all of you as part of this endeavor.
To the Grand Pooh-bah and all the staff at Da Capo Lifelong Press for taking this onthe first time, and now again!and for making the arduous process of publishing so relatively painless.
Boundless thanks to Rene Sedliar: you first found this book a great home when I was sure it would remain ever homeless, fought the good fight, wielded your editorial machete like a peaceable ninja, took my serious stuff seriously, talked me down from the occasional total freakout, laughed at my jokes, and even came back for round two, you silly masochist, you. The prospect of working with you again was literally half my happy at creating a second edition. I could not ask for a better advocate and editor; this is a book made far, far better for your irreplaceable part in it and dedication to it. Youre the tops!
To Christopher Schelling: for your tireless attempts to find a home for this book the first time around, your incredible patience with me (and everyone else), and your support.
To the Scarleteam, my incredible staff and volunteers at Scarleteen: for your passionate dedication to sex education, young adults, and sexual health and your constant faith in my unique approach. An additional thanks for your saintly patience with me during the creation of the second edition, when I learned too late that you cant work two full-time jobs anymore when youre middle-aged and do either with any kind of consistent competency. You all had my back, helped cover my butt, and gave even more than you already do of your valuable time and energy to make sure Scarleteen and its users didnt suffer when I was scattered and spread thin. The Scarleteam RULES.
To Clare Sainsbury, who has often savedand keeps on savingthe day.
To the generous people who gave me invaluable aid and information the first time around, especially editorial assistants Laurel Martinez and Kythryne Aisling, and consultants Rebecca Trotzky-Sirr; Janel Hanmer, MD, PhD; Richard Fraser, APNP; Laura Jones; Kerrick Adrian; Erin Seiberlich, MD; Terri Rearick, RN, BS, CIC; Ben Wizner of the ACLU; and Hollie West, RN, BScN.
Great gratitude to a few new additions for round two, all of whom stepped it up for me and this book at the eleventh hour because I lacked the foresight to ask in a more reasonable time frame, including Margaret Hobart, Johanna Schorn, and Amanda Seely. To Dr. Deborah Oyer, who I feel certain is the best abortion and reproductive health provider on the planet, who Im blessed to call colleague and friend, and whose educated and eagle-eyed comments and corrections were invaluable. To Sam Wall, who not only provided extra coverage at work for me at Scarleteen but also gave me some great feedback on one of the chapters I really needed hers for. To my neighbor and pal Cath Airola, who, lucky for me, was a dedicated public defender for years who cares a lot about people and their rights and supports what I do enough to have leant me some of her time, mind, and patience with my sometimes-cutthroat creative process.