Guinn - How Mrs. Claus Saved Christmas

Table of Contents

ALSO BY JEFF GUINN

JEREMY P. TARCHER/PENGUIN
a member of Penguin Group (USA) Inc.
New York

FOR SARA CARDER Thanks

We had just settled into our seats that evening, each of us enjoying a thick wedge of Candy Cane Pie, a special recipe by a wonderful Norwegian pastry chef named Lars. He makes the most fabulous desserts you can imagine, and many more you cant.

WE NEVER STOP WORKING at the North Pole. Though children all over the world only expect to find presents from us on one of three morningsDecember 6, December 25, or January 6we need the rest of the year to design and build their toys. In fact, we work just as hard during the spring, summer, and fall as we do around those wonderful winter holidays of St. Nicholas Day, Christmas, and the Epiphany. Most people, I find, dont realize this. Over the years, Ive seen thousands of cartoons about where Santa likes to take his vacations. These are often funny drawings of me on the beach sipping a drink through a straw, or at a baseball game enjoying a hot dog. And its true I enjoy baseball and hot dogs, but I mostly do so in my den at the North Pole, watching the game on television and eating the hot dog from a tray on my lap. Beaches are less enticing. As someone who is well over seventeen hundred years old and, I admit, perhaps a few pounds overweight, wearing a bathing suit in public is not something Im eager to do.

Besides, there simply isnt leisure time to spend at the beach. There are no magic North Pole buttons we can push to make toys instantly appear for every deserving girl and boy. I explained in a book I wrote about my life that there is a fair share of magic in what we do, but theres plenty of hard work, too. Everyone living here at the North Poleand there are hundreds of usis kept very busy from the time we gather for breakfast each morning, at eight oclock sharp, until about six or so in the evening, when theres dinner and, afterward, well-deserved relaxation and fellowship until its time to go to bed.

Designed by the great inventor Leonardo da Vinci, our North Pole home is a complex series of buildings and tunnels mostly underneath the snow, so that no one in planes flying overhead will notice us. The long, well-lighted workshops and assembly lines are separated from everyones private living quarters by a large dining hall and several other rooms where comfortable chairs and sofas and widescreen televisions and well-stocked bookshelves make it pleasant for friends to gather and chat, read, or watch movies. No one is required to be anywhere doing anything. Its all very informal. Those who want quiet to enjoy their books can have complete peace in one place, while in another, dozens may be happily gathered to watch a hilarious film. Leonardo was careful to make each room soundproof, so that hearty laughter from one room does not disturb companionable silence in another.

Though everyone is free to choose what to do and whom to spend their evenings with, it often happens that one group is comprised of what we call the old companionsthose of us who have been together longest in this eternal mission of helping everyone celebrate the joy and wonder of the holiday season. Im never happier than when these very special people are gathered with meFelix, the Roman slave who became my first companion; Attila, known through the ages as The Hun, and his wife, Dorothea; Arthur, the British war chief who, in legend, became celebrated as a king; St. Francis of Assisi, who wrote some of the first Christmas carols; Willie Skokan, the incomparable craftsman; Leonardo da Vinci and Benjamin Franklin, two great inventors and significant figures in world history; Sarah Kemble Knight, Felixs wife, who wrote the very first book about traveling in America; Teddy Roosevelt, the former president of the United States; Amelia Earhart, the wonderful aviator; and Bill Pickett, the great cowboy who could wrestle any steer to the ground in a matter of seconds. And, of course, theres the person I love and admire most of all, my wife, Layla, whose common sense and courage have inspired us during many challenging times.

Although weve known one another for a very long time, being together remains quite agreeable. Sometimes we dont even get around to watching a movie or reading books at all, because someone tells a favorite story and then everyone else begins reminiscing about wonderful times or places or people. Even though weve heard these same stories hundreds or even thousands of time before, theyre still enjoyable. Felix, for instance, loves to tell about how he met George Washington and informed him that the German troops opposing him in the Revolutionary War would be spending Christmas night celebrating rather than guarding their camp. Based on this information, General Washington crossed the Delaware after dark on December 25, 1776, and took the Germans by surprise. Teddy Roosevelt is always ready to jump in and talk about his great adventures, including how he helped create eighteen national monuments. Leonardo might recall painting his masterpiece, the Mona Lisa. Every so often, Im coaxed into recounting my first days of gift-giving, when I was a bishop in the early Christian church and even before that, as a small boy whose dream it was to bring comfort to those in need. Actually, I need very little coaxing.

Everyone always seems to have a story to share, and occasionally that includes Layla. But on most evenings, she prefers sitting quietly and listening to others. It isnt that shes too shy to speak. As Layla has demonstrated throughout the sixteen centuries weve been married, if she feels there is something that ought to be said, she will say it, and always in her pleasant, practical way. Layla is so intelligent, and so perceptiveshe was the one back in the 1100s who helped us decide we must give toys to children instead of food, because the food would soon be gone but the toys would be lasting reminders that someone cared enough about them to bring gifts. It was also my wife who suggested that we deliver these gifts on three special nights rather than randomly throughout the year, so that we would have time to properly prepare, but more important, to help keep holiday traditions alive. And it was Layla, in the middle 1640s, who saved Christmas.

Thats a story no one but Layla, Arthur, and I really knew until recently, when it came up by accident. We had not deliberately kept it a secret. For more than three and a half centuries, Layla simply didnt feel like talking about these particular Christmas-related events, which have been mostly overlooked by historians. Oh, they get some of the basic facts rightfor a while in England, celebrating Christmas was against the law, until finally the people protested and got their beloved holiday back againbut they have no idea of the important part Layla played in it.