Brent Bradley - Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy For Dummies

Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy For Dummies

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Library and Archives Canada Cataloguing in Publication

Bradley, Brent A., authorEmotionally focused couple therapy for dummies / Brent Bradley, James Furrow.

(For dummies)Includes index.Issued in print and electronic formats.ISBN 978-1-118-51231-9 (pbk.)--ISBN 978-1-118-51233-3 (pdf).--ISBN 978-1-118-51240-1 (epub)

1. Couples therapy. 2. Emotion-focused therapy I. Furrow, James L., author II. Title. III. Series: For dummies

RC 488.5.B73 2013 616.89'1562 CS2013-903235-5CS2013-903236-3

ISBN 978-1-118-51231-9 (pbk); ISBN 978-1-118-51239-5 (ebk); ISBN 978-1-118-51233-3 (ebk); ISBN 978-1-118-51240-1 (ebk)

Printed in the United States of America

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

Introduction

E very day, we talk to couples who want something more from their relationships. Some are struggling to renew a passion they once had. Others are fighting to survive as a couple. The turning point for most couples is not resolving a particular disagreement or making a new decision but finding new ways to face each other through these challenges. For some, this change is about regaining the love they once had, and for others its about finding love for the first time. The key to transforming a relationship begins with an emotional connection.

Over time couples learn to get along, make adjustments, and sometimes settle into predictable patterns. If you and your partner are one of these couples, taking a hard look at how you get along and what you do to keep the peace will open new doors for growth. Resilience in a relationship begins with making positive emotional connections and new investments in the love you share.

Emotionally focused therapy (EFT) was developed by psychologists Susan Johnson and Leslie Greenberg at the University of British Columbia at a time when therapists and researchers were focused on changing behaviors to improve a couples relationship. Behavior change helped partners make significant improvements in treatment, but for many couples these gains didnt last. EFT pioneered a new approach to improving relationships through emotion-based change.

Research studies have found that EFT is an effective treatment for distressed couples. More than 70 percent of couples receiving EFT recover from symptoms of relationship distress; up to 90 percent report seeing improvements in their relationship. Over 25 years of research has documented EFTs benefits to couples who are also facing other challenges, including depression, sexual disorders, traumatic exposure, depression, breast cancer, and childhood illness.

EFT is more than a clinically proven approach. It offers couples a new experience of their relationship, one that provides renewed trust and a deeper level of intimacy. EFT principles and practices enable couples to identify common patterns that define their conflicts and enable partners to shift out of positions that often keep them stuck. Partners are able to face their challenges together and find safety and a deep sense of well-being in the love they share.

About This Book

The purpose of this book is to provide you with an experience of EFT. We take you inside the EFT process and offer insights and activities that will strengthen your relationship. Our goal is to invite you to better understand your own emotions and share those emotions with your partner. We hope your partner will join you on this journey and that, together, you will take new steps to deepen your commitment to a relationship you can count on in the years to come.

In this book, you find

The power of emotions to organize you and your relationship

Key differences between types of emotion

Ways to identify your conflict style and the role you play

Predictable strategies couples use to manage difficult emotions

Ways to overcome fears and resolve unspoken needs

Steps for facing obstacles to a more caring and intimate relationship

Rituals that will strengthen the emotional connection you and your partner share