Stoddard - Happiness for two: 75 secrets for finding more joy together

My lifes great richness is due to my being a writer. I thank my friend and literary agent Carl Brandt for recognizing this is my life. I appreciate my editor, Toni Sciarra, for understanding my need to write books and for her help in the process of publication. You both care deeply about my work. I couldnt be who I am without your support, encouragement, brilliant minds, and thoughtful help every step of my journey.

I send you, Carl, and you, Toni, great affection, appreciation, happiness, and love.

I am a witness for over fifty-four yearsand thirty-four years of marriageto Alexandras own remarkable development of strong character and achievementas an interior designer, author, and lifestyle philosopher, who now presents her pioneering discovery of the essential keys to ways lovers can find greater joy in their lives. Happiness for Two is the delicious result.

My first observation began one sunny day in Southport, Connecticut. My sister Bebe introduced me to her young tennis partner on the court at the annual Labor Day tournament. Alexandra demonstrated then as a teenager a certain vigorous grace and bright spirit while playing the game with strength, laughter, and joy. At the same time, I noted that she and my sister managed, artfully, to win game after game, set after set, until they whipped their traumatized opponents royally and were awarded the coveted Silver Trophy.

That was a grand match in 1954Twenty years later, Alexandra and I were married at St. James Church in Manhattan. We have been happily together ever since.

In between, Alexandra had graduated from Mary Burnham boarding school in Northampton, further honing her skills in interior design and tennis. Her art teacher, Phyl Gardner, played a significant role in persuading her not to apply to nearby Smith College and instead seek admission to the New York School of Interior Design, where she received the first full scholarship.

Alexandras Aunt Betty, an international social worker, whisked her away for a trip around the world in 1959. It was a vivid, eye-opening experience, exposing her to architecture, design, and beauty as well as to scenes of sorrow, suffering, and poverty. The combination gave depth to her future design and literary careers, while increasing her understanding of human nature and our universal search for meaning and purpose in our lives.

When Alexandra returned to interior design school, she had the good fortune to meet Eleanor McMillen Brown (no relation), doyenne of interior design, who had come to the school to lecture. Alexandra was captivated by this brilliant seventy-year-olds exceptional grace and practical wisdom. With immediate appreciation of Alexandras talent, Mrs. Brown hired her at the prominent firm McMillen, Inc.

Alexandra became Mrs. Browns friend and special assistant. She worked there for fourteen years until her boss retired in 1977. Alexandra then decided to start her own interior design company, Alexandra Stoddard, Incorporated, with Mrs. Browns blessings.

On Valentines Day, 2007, as I often would do, I wrote a letter to Alexandra to tell her of my love for her these thirty-three years togetherour own happiness for two. I told her how grateful I have been for her cheerful, creative spirit, high character, and achievement that have so blessed our lives. This, I said, had been an astonishing adventure that I wished to continue to share with her for all time.

Alexandras compassionate, authentic book Happiness for Two tells a fresh and honest story, teaching all of us the gentle, incisive ways of being that enable lovers to grow more deeply in love, individually and together, throughout their lives, to find for themselves and experience happiness for two.

Alexandras mantra: Love & Live Happy.

W hen we think of each encounter as though it could be the last, there is a poetic tenderness that perfumes the atmosphere. Were living in the post9/11 era, with a raised consciousness about how vulnerable we are. We never know if we will ever see each other again. The wisest way to keep our love fresh is to be aware of how deeply intertwined our lives are. When we live in the heart of each moment together, if and when our lover is taken from us, we will have few regrets.

What would you do differently if this moment together were your last? Think of someone you love who has died. Do you remember the last time you were together? Do you recall what you said and did?

We should keep our relationship up-to-date, moment by moment. It doesnt matter where we are or what the circumstances are as long as were together. Now, remind yourself, you have each other and can hold each other affectionately. This acute awareness of the fragility of our love affair should change the way we think and act. Now may be the only time we have.

From this day forward, gently enjoy the sacred bond between you. Whenever we live in this consciousness, it sparks the flames of love and intensifies our appreciation of the moment and of the shortness of life on earth.

I have found sublime happiness with Peter. I know this paradise on earth will not last forever. Im aware at the same time that the energy of love never dies. While we have this blessing of our love for each other, we intend to treasure every moment were privileged to be alive, in love, and together.

It is my fervent wish for you that each time you are with your lover, you will know anew how rare your happiness is, and your heart will overflow with appreciation.

When two souls in love meet and find happiness for two, this is the greatest blessing we can have bestowed upon us on this fleeting earthly journey. With all our relationships, when we understand each encounter as though it could be our last, we honor ourselves and others. See the light in your lover and others and openly express your gratitude and love.

TREASURE EACH OTHER IN

THE RECOGNITION THAT WE

DO NOT KNOW HOW LONG

WE SHALL HAVE EACH OTHER.

Joshua Loth Liebman

T he ultimate expression of fulfillment in a human life is to love another as your other self and through this precious bond find lasting happiness. Love is our life force, what I call our spirit-energy. We cannot live fully without loving and being loved. Love is the cornerstone of all well-being, all happiness. Were healed, supported, uplifted, and sustained by this greatest force for good.

For over thirty years, my mantra has been Love & Live Happy. I find the words sacred, expressing mystical potentialities. Whenever I feel my spirit-energy of happiness deflating, I repeat my mantra: Love & Live Happy. Love is the beginning, middle, and end of all our positive emotions. It is the foundation of all our profound feelings that are essential to increase our own happiness and the well-being of others.