Karen Stabiner - The Empty Nest: 31 Parents Tell the Truth About Relationships, Love, and Freedom After the Kids Fly the Coop

Anyone dreading, savoring, or recovering from their childs entering the train station of adulthood will recognize themselves in these bittersweet, boldly personal essays from more than 30 parents. Packed with hard-earned wisdom and snippets of advice, this comforting collection by pining parents softens the blow of the inescapable.

People

An exercise in creative catharsis.

The New York Times

Yes, the empty nest is a rough place to be. But take heart: As these highly readable and engaging essays show, youre not alone.

Washington Post

Skillfully gathered these writers created a much needed road map [the] stories are rich with the kind of honesty you wont hear at graduation.

Los Angeles Times

[A] varied and compassionate collection should make [parents] feel that theyre in good company as they navigate this parental rite of passage.

Publishers Weekly

The Empty Nest speaks to the universality of this rite of passage and evokes every emotion in the spectrum the essays offer healthy doses of reassurance, funny shocks of recognition, and plenty of food for thought. Whether youre counting the days or dreading the prospect, The Empty Nest reminds us that even though the nest may be empty, life is still full.

AARP Magazine

As the mother of two teenage daughters, including a high school senior, I opened The Empty Nest with trepidation, but finished it filled with gratitude and insight. Karen Stabiner has brought together an amazing collection of parents who share their intimate stories. Sometimes funny, sometimes heartrending, this book is a valuable road map through one of lifes most daunting transitions.

Arianna Huffington, author of On Becoming Fearless

This honest, insightful collection is for parents at any stage of the processreminding us that the highest accomplishment of parenting is to raise children who can joyfully and successfully leave the nest, and to be the kind of parent who can let them go.

Hope Edelman, author of Motherless Daughters

With breathtaking candor, humor, and elegance, these essays probe the ambivalence of being laid off from the one job thatno matter what else we dowill be our most important contribution to the world. The Empty Nest is a deeply affecting banquet of thoughts on the only love that must grow toward separation.

Jacquelyn Mitchard, author of The Deep End of the Ocean and Still Summer

For Sarah Ivria

A n old hard-shell suitcase is like a book. It sits open on the bed, symmetrical, cracked along its spine, waiting to see what story it gets to tell this time. A family vacation means shorts and sandals and a big floppy hat that rolls up; a business trip means good wool in a monochromatic palette. Either way, an old suitcase demands planning, and rewards economy of scale. There is no room for extraneous detail; the frame wont yield. My husband has one that belonged to his father, stiff cream leather with trim two shades darker and brass fittings. We never use it.

A new suitcase is more of a receptacle, with its soft sides, its wheels, and zippers that open to reveal another six inches of space. It allows for indecision and spontaneityan extra pair of shoes even though red goes with nothing else you brought, the goofy souvenir that will go onto the back shelf with all the other souvenirs. A mother might say that a new suitcase lacks discipline, having spent her share of trips lugging a bulging case that a little girl can no longer manage. A daughter sees it differently. A pouchy case on wheels is all about potential. Its ready for adventure.

We dont yet own a suitcase big enough for our next major trip, which will be to take Sarah to college in the fall. I doubt that such a case even exists; how can you pack an entire life into a finite space? I expect that we will have to use more than one: We will stride onto campus together, Sarah in the middle, Larry and me at either flank, pulling her future behind us in thirds, as we walk up to the first room she will live in that is not down the hallway from ours.

She was four when the Northridge earthquake hit, and I was down that hallway and at her bedside before I was fully awake. She giggled as I reached down to grab her and get her away from the windows. Mommy, I tried to sit up, but the house made my legs fly up in the air! she said. This is the thing about an impending departure: My mind scrolls back and forth through history, as though I could lock onto a memory and slow things down.