In all examples identifying information has been changed to protect privacy. Some identities are composites.
Love after Love from COLLECTED POEMS 19481984 by Derek Walcott.
Copyright 1986 by Derek Walcott. Reprinted by permission of Farrar, Straus and Giroux, LLC.
Unconditional from POEMS FOR THE PATH by Jennifer Paine Welwood.
Copyright 1998 by Jennifer Paine Welwood. Reprinted by permission of Jennifer Paine Welwood.
Why Marriage? Copyright 1996 by Mari Nichols-Haining. Reprinted
by permission of Mari Nichols-Haining.
Your Desperation from THE TAO OF A WOMAN by Michele Ritterman.
Copyright 2009 by Michele Ritterman. Reprinted by permission of Skipping Stones Editions.
Copyright 2011 by Dr. Diana Kirschner, Ph.D.
All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning, uploading, and electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the publisher is unlawful piracy and theft of the authors intellectual property. If you would like to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), prior written permission must be obtained by contacting the publisher at permissions@hbgusa.com. Thank you for your support of the authors rights.
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eISBN 978-1-5999-5386-1
Praise for
SEALING THE DEAL
With deep wisdom and compassion, Diana Kirschner provides a powerful blueprint for any woman struggling to find an enduring relationship. Kirschner writes with the authority of a therapist with thousands of hours in the trenches, helping real-life women get out of their own way and into happy partnerships. Read this book: some of these insights might just change your life.
Evan Marc Katz, author of Why Youre Still Single
Dr. Diana has done it again with her fantastic book, SEALING THE DEAL: The Love Mentors Guide to Lasting Love! Her knowledge and teachings are second to none! Definitely read this book, take the quizzes, and find out for sure if hes really the One.
Julie Spira, bestselling author, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online
SEALING THE DEAL is a must-read and a necessary addition to any womans self-help shelf. It is filled with timeless advice for finding and keeping the One.
Tamsen Fadal, WPIX-TV morning news anchor and author of Why Hasnt He Called?
A superlative successor to the smash Love in 90 Days. Dr. Diana outlines a thorough and achievable blueprint for creating a nurturing relationship.
Sherry Amatenstein, author of The Complete Marriage Counselor
With a successful 25-year marriage and decades as a therapist to her credit, Diana Kirschner is a relationship expert worth taking seriously. Her book SEALING THE DEAL offers practical, empowering and solid advice for those ready to find and keep the love of a lifetime.
Arielle Ford, author of The Soulmate Secret
SEALING THE DEAL is a sharp, psychologically astute, hands-on guide to getting and keeping good love in your life. Its like having an older sister whisper the real story in your ear to combat all the relationship lies and myths we learn from Hollywood movies and dating Web sites. My favorite part is when Dr. Diana opens up about her own struggles from the past, proving the wisdom shes sharing is deep and hard-won.
Susan Shapiro, author of Secrets of a Fix-up Fanatic and Overexposed
A heartfelt, irresistible, and easy-to-follow guide that can improve anyones love life. SEALING THE DEAL will teach you not only how to find true love, but more importantly, how to keep it passionately alive.
Rachel Greenwald, author of Have Him at Hello
A wonderful, fun, and wise guide to finding and keeping love. Its filled with nuggets to pen your heart and mind to the love you deserve.
Dr. Judith Orloff, author of Emotional Freedom
Men may love bitches, but they ultimately wind up with women who apply Dr. Dianas secrets. Once you chose Mr. Right, he will commit and live out your happiest-ever-after if you follow her simple program in SEALING THE DEAL. Lasting love is your happiness GPS and its also your destination. Dr. Diana has laid out the map and cleared the fast lane, so step on it!
Steve Santagati, New York Times bestselling author, The MANual
To my husband and love partner, Sam, whose unseen hand lifts and lights my soul and all that I do.
To my great son, Jason, a true-heart warrior, and his beloved bride, Rachel, who radiates inner grace and outer beauty, on the occasion of their marriage. May you forever find love in each others eyes, blessings in each others care, and together create a life rich with unfolding wonders and new delights.
As I expanded out of a childhood chrysalis of great fear and ignorance, I was blessed to learn how to make love itself take seed and grow; doubly blessed to experience such magic in my own marriage; and triply blessed to help many other couples find their own shared path of dreams. With all that I learned, I have longed to write a book about the secrets for making passionate love last. Now that great dream has come true!
First I want to acknowledge all my clients, Love Mentees, and students, who were absolutely instrumental in helping refine the work.
Very special thanks also to: Bel Grubert; Carol and Nolan Grubert; Beth Grubert; Stan and Dr. Hildy Richelson; Beth Coltoff Koren and Dr. Tedd Koren; Michele Ritterman, Ph.D.; Terry Barak; Joey Avniel; and our superb online strategist, Steve Paul, for their ideas, support, and belief in me and the project.
A big shout-out to my first group of brilliant, loving, and magically helpful Love Mentors who work with me, helping women all over the world find their own true love: Lori Hammel, Betts Mayer, Claudia Braun-Cole, Jim Delpino, and Alec Satin. As I write these words I am thrilled to say that a second, much larger group of talented men and women have joined me as expert Love Mentors to help meet the many requests I receive daily.
Greatest thanks to my wise, dear, and super-supportive friends: the brilliant and generous author Susan Shapiro, the ever-helpful Melanie Gorman from Yourtango.com, Laura Marini, Cathy Kadets, Nanci Deutsch, Deb Kalas, Susan Davies, Alexandra Desbrow, Sandra Park, Sherri Tennant, Mitchell and Liz Rigie, Anna Garduno, Susan Rosbrow-Reich, Ph.D., and Connie Bennett.
My incredible son, Jason Kirschner, was terrifically encouraging, especially when he rescued me from shoulder problems with new mouse gadgets. His amazing wife, Rachel, was always steady and fully supportive.
My dearest soul mate sister, Sandra Robertson, supported me, as ever, with complete and unwavering belief in me and my mission of spreading love.
And thanks to the incredible team at Center Street, whose mission married mine: Rolf Zettersten, Andrea Glickson, Shannon Stowe PR maven, Jody Waldrup, and the whole Hachette Book Group sales force. And most especially, visionary Harry Helm and the dynamo sales goddess Gina Wynn. Heartfelt thanks for believing in me and doing such a fantastic job on the book and its promotion. Thanks to Shauna Toh for her work on the endnotes and to Veronica Sepe for editorial assistance.