Thomas Atwood - The Whole Life Adoption Book: Realistic Advice for Building a Healthy Adoptive Family

The Whole Life Adoption Book is a comprehensive guide for adoptive parents, from the point of considering adoption through raising strong, well-adjusted children to adulthood. The wealth of experience and wisdom within these pages will be of immeasurable value to adoptive parents. This book should be in the library of every adoptive family.

BETSY KEEFER SMALLEY , manager of adoption and foster care training, Institute for Human Services; coauthor of Telling the Truth to Your Adopted or Foster Child: Making Sense of the Past

Full of wisdom and honesty about the joys and challenges adoptive families face, The Whole Life Adoption Book is a wonderful resource for families, both before and after they decide to build their families through adoption. Informative and encouraging, it is a valuable book to have and refer back to time and time again.

KRIS FAASSE , ACSW, LMSW, director of adoption services, Bethany Christian Services

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The Whole Life Adoption Book: Realistic Advice for Building a Healthy Adoptive Family

Copyright 2008 by Jayne E. Schooler and Thomas Clifford Atwood. All rights reserved.

A NavPress resource published in alliance with Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.

NAVPRESS and the NAVPRESS logo are registered trademarks of NavPress, The Navigators, Colorado Springs, CO. TYNDALE is a registered trademark of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. Absence of in connection with marks of NavPress or other parties does not indicate an absence of registration of those marks.

Cover design by The DesignWorks Group, Nate Salciccioli, www.thedesignworksgroup.com

Creative Team: Kris Wallen, Traci Mullins, Kathy Mosier, Darla Hightower, Arvid Wallen, Kathy Guist

Scripture quotations marked NASB are taken from the New American Standard Bible, copyright 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation. Used by permission.

Scripture quotations marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version, copyright 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Some of the anecdotal illustrations in this book are true to life and are included with the permission of the persons involved. All other illustrations are composites of real situations, and any resemblance to people living or dead is coincidental.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Schooler, Jayne E.

The whole life adoption book : realistic advice for building a healthy

adoptive family / Jayne E. Schooler and Thomas Atwood. -- Rev. and

updated.

p. cm.

Includes bibliographical references.

ISBN 978-1-60006-165-3

1. Adoption. 2. Adoptive parents. I. Atwood, Thomas. II. Title.

HV875.S365 2008

362.734--dc22

2007049391

Build: 2021-04-21 22:38:33 EPUB 3.0

Dedication

From Jayne

To David,

My best friend and delight of my life

From Tom

To Eileen and Chris,

My precious and loving family

In the years since the first edition of The Whole Life Adoption Book was published, not only has the American culture grown in its understanding of the beauties and challenges of adoption, but also I, as an adoption professional committed to the training and education of adoptive and foster families and professionals, have truly grown. That growth has come through the encouragement and support of colleagues for over twenty years.

I first began my work in adoption at Warren County Children Services, Lebanon, Ohio, in 1986, coming to that position as a former educator and foster parent. I experienced incredible support then as the first edition of The Whole Life Adoption Book was being written. It was the executive director, Mr. R. D. Burchwell; my supervisor, Mr. Steve Kelhoffer; and many other colleagues who encouraged me in that very first effort.

Since becoming a full-time national and international adoption educator, I have had the privilege of working with many individuals from the Institute of Human Services in Columbus, Ohio, and being part of the Ohio Child Welfare Training Program. I would like to express my deep appreciation to the following colleagues at IHS:

• Dr. Ronald Hughes and Dr. Judith Rycus, founders and directors of IHS, who gave me a place to serve and a rich environment in which to learn
• Betsy Keefer Smalley, a dear friend and cowriter of numerous curricula, articles, and a book, who continually challenges me to observe, study, and learn
• Norma Ginther, Lois Tyler, Pam Severs, and Dr. Denise Goodman, who mentored and encouraged me and from whom I have learned much and continue to do so

I am indebted to many other colleagues from IHS and other adoption professionals from around the country whose paths I only briefly crossed but who influenced and changed my career nonetheless. I am also indebted to all the regional coordinators for the Ohio Child Welfare training program, who gave me a place to improve my training skills and to serve.

One of the most enjoyable experiences of working on the updated version of this book has been to work alongside a coauthor and two other contributing authors for the first time and to team up again with the original editor of The Whole Life Adoption Book. I would like to thank Thomas Atwood, president of National Council For Adoption, for joining me as coauthor. Thanks also to Chuck Johnson, NCFA vice president of Training and Agency Services, and Nicole Ficere Callahan for their willingness to assist with this project and for all the expert additions to the book. Because of their support, The Whole Life Adoption Book was updated to meet the needs of adopting families in the twenty-first century.

Two contributors, Dr. Timothy Callahan and Elizabeth Tracy, have brought incredible knowledge and life experience to this project, which has added depth and understanding. Because of their time and effort, I know families and children will be helped.

A huge thank you goes to my editor, Traci Mullins, who captured the vision for this book over fifteen years ago. It was my incredible privilege to work with Traci on the first edition, and it was once again my privilege to work with her on this updated version.

I want to thank my husband, David, my most treasured source of friendship, encouragement, and support, for continuing to believe in me and for carrying additional responsibilities so the revised addition of this book could be written. I thank my son, Ray, who joined our family by adoption at age sixteen, for sharing his life with us. I have learned much about adoption and the needs of children from him. Now forty-one, he has matured into a remarkable young man and awesome father to beautiful Lacey.

Fifteen years ago, I commented in the acknowledgments that my then sixteen-year-old daughter hoped to pursue a degree in social work. Kristy Schooler Matheson is now a social worker as well as a wife to Rick and mom to two awesome children, Micah and Annalise. It is a great joy to share our common passion for foster care and adoption as Kristy serves as an adoption professional in Ohio. We often trade adoption stories and could talk for hours about our shared vision.