Jay Wiseman - The Toybag Guide to Basic Rope Bondage

T HE T OYBAG G UIDE TO

B ASIC R OPE B ONDAGE

BY J AY W ISEMAN

Entire contents 2011 by Greenery Press.

All rights reserved. Except for brief passages quoted in newspaper, magazine, radio, television or Internet reviews, no part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying or recording or by information storage or retrieval system, without permission in writing from the Publisher.

Published in the United States by Greenery Press, Eugene, Oregon, www.greenerypress.com. Distributed by SCB Distributors, Gardena, CA.

W ARNING AND D ISCLAIMER

Readers should understand that all BDSM carries an inherent risk of physical injury, emotional injury, injury to relationships, and other types of harm. While we believe that following the guidelines set forth in this book will help you reduce that risk to a reasonable level, the writer and publisher encourage you to understand that you are choosing to take some risk when you decide to engage in these activities, and to accept personal responsibility for that risk.

While we have diligently researched the information we put in this book, it may nonetheless be incomplete, inaccurate, or out of date. Therefore, in acting on the information in this book, you agree to assume the risk of its contents as is and with all faults. Please notify us of any errors so that we may address them in future printings.

The information in this book should not be used as medical or therapeutic advice. Neither the author, the publisher nor anyone else associated with the creation or sale of this book is liable for any damage caused by your participating in the activities described herein.

T IP O T HE H AT

Id like to take a moment to give a merry wave and shout out to some of my fellow bondage teachers and rope geeks (craven apologies for this admittedly incomplete list) who have taught me a lot.

alittlebitbent

Artemis Hunter

Boss Bondage

Chanta Rose

Charly B

David Lawrence

Douglas Kent

Dov

Gord

Graydancer

Jack ElFrink

Jim Duvall

Jimi Tatu

Klawdya

Lady Gold

Lee Harrington

Lew Rubins

Lochai

Lolita Wolf

Lorelei

LqqkOut

Luvbight and deeluvbight

Madame Butterfly

Madison Young Mark, Lani, and Aleni De Viate

Mark Yu

Max in Seattle

MerlinPix

Midori

Molly Devon

Nawataipan

NCD

OkieNawa

Percival

Philip the Foole

Punzel

Qatana

Questioner

Rigger Jay

Rigger MorTis

ropeangel

Scott Smith

shevah

Shibari Warrior

SpikeDom

Suzanne SexySadist

Twisted Monk

Two Knotty Boys

Zamil

Zelda

And special thanks to bondage model extraordinaire Ms. Atheris of Fantasy Makers in the San Francisco Bay Area, www. fantasymakers.com. Also, special thanks to Madame Butterfly, maker of silk and other uique ropes for bondage, for taking many of the photographs in this book. www. butterflyrope.com.

D EDICATION

This book is dedicated to Shannah, whose ongoing helpfulness did a very great deal to facilitate its coming into being.

Most welcome bondage, for thou art a way, I think, to liberty. William Shakespeare

C HAPTER 1. I NTRODUCTION

W ith this book, its my pleasure to introduce you to the fundamental principles and basic techniques of consensual erotic rope bondage. I have enjoyed consensual erotic rope bondage, both tying and getting tied, with numerous partners, since the early 1970s. It has added a great deal of fun and erotic enjoyment to my relationships, and without it my sex life would have been a lot more boring. Overall, consensual erotic rope bondage has had a very good risk/benefit ratio for me and has added a great deal of richness to my life.

It is therefore both my pleasure and my privilege to share this books contents with you. If you follow the advice herein, you should have very positive experiences. My strong hope is that after your bondage session, both of you will feel extremely good about yourselves, about your partner, and about what the two of you did. Hopefully, the two of you will want to do it again. For some people, engaging in consensual erotic rope bondage can add richness and intimacy to a relationship that are difficult to achieve by other means.

That said, this practice is not without its riskssome of which I learned about the hard way. I have experienced a very small number of mishaps where an outcome could have been very bad. Fortunately, that didnt happen. (I have never been personally involved in a bondage situation that resulted in serious injury.) More fortunately, I learned from those experiences. Even more fortunately, I can share those experiences with you so that your explorations into bondage can have far fewer misadventures and far more good outcomes.

Let me add a very specific bit of advice here: I strongly recommend that both you and your prospective bondage partner read this book in its entirety before you attempt a bondage session. The fact that both of you have read it, and that each of you knows that the other has also read it, will help a great deal towards having both of you understand what is reasonable and what is not as regards consensual erotic rope bondage. Each of you knowing that each of you has read the rulebook will contribute substantially to your having a positive bondage experience.

This is a very introductory book, particularly as regards the tying techniques. That said, whats presented here will certainly give you a solid start, and I have included resources for further exploration. Have fun exploring the exciting world of consensual erotic rope bondage.

Jay Wiseman, November 2010, San Francisco

C HAPTER 2. S ETTING U P Y OUR F IRST B ONDAGE S CENE

W hat do you mean you want to tie me up while we have sex??? I thought I knew you! How can you even think that way???

The above is not too different from the reaction I got the first time I ever asked a woman I was involved with if I could tie her up while we had sex. Part of me could understand why she felt so concerned. (Keep in mind this conversation happened back in about 1970, when things like bondage were almost unheard of, and very, very taboo.) The hippie era was very much still in progress, and peace, love, and bondage was not one of our mantras.

Fortunately, since then weve come a very long way in accepting more forms of sex play. Dr. Alex Comfort did a lot to help the situation in his wonderful book The Joy of Sex.This book was first published in 1972 and I got my copy in 1973. (Its still in print, albeit in a new edition.) When I was able to show a potential sex partner the bondage section in that wonderful book, it did a lot to help her entertain the thought that mixing in some bondage with our sex life was at least an option that could be considered by a sane person. Some of my partners took me up on the ideawith growing enthusiasm as they got to know it.

Today, things are better. Surveys of college students have shown that up to 40% of them have at least experimented with bondage, spanking, and other BDSM-related activities. Today, if you ask someone if you can tie them up during sex, or be tied up by them, you may get a no, but youre much less likely to get an Im shocked that you could even ask! reaction. (Of course, you also have a decent chance of getting an enthusiastic Sure!)

Today, a large percentage of people understand that bondage, if done in a consensual erotic context and with reasonable safety, can add a rich dimension of erotic enjoyment to someones sex life.