Janis Amatuzio - Beyond Knowing: Mysteries & Messages of Death & Life from a Forensic Pathologist

Copyright 2006 by Janis Amatuzio, MD

All rights reserved. This book may not be reproduced in whole or in part, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic, mechanical, or other without written permission from the publisher, except by a reviewer, who may quote brief passages in a review.

Lyrics on page 198 from Bridge over Troubled Water 1969 by Paul Simon. Used with permission.

Text design and typography by Tona Pearce Myers

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Amatuzio, Janis.

Beyond knowing : mysteries and messages of death and life from a forensic

pathologist / Janis Amatuzio.

p. cm.

ISBN-13: 978-1-57731-550-6 (hardcover : alk. paper)

1. Thanatology. 2. DeathCase studies. 3. Conduct of life. I. Title.

HQ1073.A484 2006

First printing, October 2006

ISBN-10: 1-57731-550-2

ISBN-13: 978-1-57731-550-6

Printed in Canada on acid-free, partially recycled paper

A proud member of the Green Press Initiative

Distributed by Publishers Group West

10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1

A s a forensic pathologist for more than twenty-five years, I have the extraordinary privilege of speaking for the dead by investigating their circumstances of death. This means examining the body and clothing; learning about personal habits, intimate beliefs, and customs; and safeguarding valuables, photographs, and other treasured possessions. I use my medical knowledge and life experience to interpret and diagnose patterns of disease, disuse, and injury. My goal is always to reveal the truth about what happened, so loved ones can mourn, understand, and return to life wiser than before.

Occasionally loved ones speak of extraordinary experiences: dreams, visions, or synchronicities surrounding the event of a death that have deeply affected their lives. These mysteries have long fascinated me and led me to write my first book, Forever Ours.

In Forever Ours, my heart still harbored some uncertainty, and my thoughts were centered on the hope implicit in the what if of the question What if these extraordinary experiences are true? Additionally, I knew that as a scientist and physician, I could not prove these experiences to any reasonable degree of medical certainty. And I was concerned that my interest would draw ridicule and criticism from my colleagues and associates. However, quite the contrary has happened; my community has supported me. Physicians and nurses, law enforcement and emergency personnel, county commissioners, and family members have applauded and encouraged the recounting of these experiences.

Their support has given me the courage to pursue my observations, and to look more deeply at the dreams, visions, and extraordinary experiences that so many people report following the death of a loved one. As a result, my second book was written from a slightly different perspective and is accompanied by a deep sense of calm. It was created to help me live more meaningfully with these experiences. It was written so I could glean the knowledge inherent in these experiences and apply it to my own life.

As I have studied those who have shared an experience with me, I have observed that they are profoundly changed and live life differently than they did before, with an inner knowing that seems to create health and beauty wherever they go. These observations are the subject of this book.

In Beyond Knowing I explore the wisdom and truths arising from these mysteriously beautiful experiences: an awareness that we already know these things; insights that trigger freedom and joy; and the recognition of profound loving reassurance that life is perfectly safe and always goes on. For me, these beautiful secrets are the wisdom that reshapes the deepest foundations of our thoughts and causes the creation of a fuller, grander, and more meaningful experience of life.

What had changed in the intervening years between my two books?

Of course, the answer is, I did. I guess it could best be described as a shift in my own awareness, from a sense of hope to one of knowing that we are immortal and forever is a long, long time a shift marked by feelings of excitement and purpose as well as profound happiness. You see, as a physician, I realize the importance of being healthy and of leading by example. I also know that we teach that which we need most to learn or remember.

But please dont take my experience as recorded in this book as the truth. Read the words on these pages and the stories that real people have shared with me. Then trust your own feelings, make your own decisions, arrive at your own truth, about one of the greatest concerns of sentient humanity: Life and Death.

When I was a student at the University of Minnesota Medical School, I did what all physicians in training before me had done. I studied anatomy and physiology, immunology and biochemistry; I sought and memorized patterns of health and disease; and I rediscovered the science and art that are the foundation of medicine. A saying I remember well from that time runs: Study hard and learn well. The dead have much to teach the living. Perhaps now is the time for us to look at the immortal mysteries that those who have died can truly teach the living.

I t would have been easy to dismiss them, these experiences that have no name, that usually start with phrases like You wont believe this... or Doctor, there is something else... but I couldnt. When I spoke with family members following the investigation into the death of a loved one, occasionally I would hear of an extraordinary coincidence, dream, or experience. I would listen, and frequently I would write down what they told me. At first I viewed these incidents as just another unusual forensic finding. However, as time went on, something changed. Something inside me awakened, and I felt as though Id caught a glimpse of something grand I had not expected. I felt jolted back to remembering but remembering what? Something very familiar. Let me explain.

Although most autopsies performed at our office are part of a death investigation for one of the forensic systems we serve, occasionally a nonforensic case is referred for other reasons, for example, to explain a disease process or to complete hospital tests. Recently, a woman named Laura requested an autopsy to help her family understand what had really happened to her husband following organ transplant surgery. The hospital course was long and difficult, and his last few weeks were a desperate and losing struggle. The ravages of the disease had taken their toll on his body and his ability to heal. After I performed the autopsy and reviewed the medical records, I scheduled a meeting with the family to review my findings. During that meeting, the extent of their concern and frustration was evident.