Helene Lerner - Time for Me: A Burst of Energy for Busy Women
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- Book:Time for Me: A Burst of Energy for Busy Women
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Women are notorious for taking care of everyone else first, exhausting themselves and losing their spark in the process. The story of this dilemma, and how one Ms. Owl found her way to renewal and vitality, will inspire working women to put themselves first from time to time and give them a shot of much-needed energy.
Ms. Owl is a working mom with a good job, a husband and son she loves and a comfortable nest. But shes so exhausted she can barely enjoy her life. One day she receives an anonymous gift certificate for a weekend at a spa. What she discovers there changes everythingnot only does she come back rested and revitalized, but she learns to make time for herself.
In the spirit of bestselling parables Who Moved My Cheese and Fish!, Time for Me is a powerful self-help tool, tackling the biggest problem that working women face today. Call it the time bind, the sandwich generation, or just plain old self-sacrifice, every woman can use this refreshing tale.
Includes a four-step process for women to follow to renew their energy whenever they need to.
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Copyright 2005 by Helene Lerner
Cover and internal design 2005 by Sourcebooks, Inc.
Cover illustration by Katie Olsen
Internal illustrations Christine Lashley
Sourcebooks and the colophon are registered trademarks of Sourcebooks, Inc.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systemsexcept in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviewswithout permission in writing from its publisher, Sourcebooks, Inc.
Portions of this material excerpted from Our Power As Women: Wisdom and Strategies of Highly Successful Women, by Helene Lerner, with permission of Conari Press, an imprint of Red Wheel/Weiser, and Stress Breakers by Helene Lerner and Roberta Elins, formerly published by Hazelden.
This publication is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher is not engaged in rendering legal, accounting, or other professional service. If legal advice or other expert assistance is required, the services of a competent professional person should be sought. From a Declaration of Principles Jointly Adopted by a Committee of the American Bar Association and a Committee of Publishers and Associations
Published by Sourcebooks, Inc.
P.O. Box 4410, Naperville, Illinois 60567-4410
(630) 961-3900
FAX: (630) 961-2168
www.sourcebooks.com
Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Lerner, Helene,
Time for me : a burst of energy for busy women / by Helene Lerner.
p. cm.
1. Working mothersUnited StatesLife skills guides. 2. Work and familyUnited States. 3. WomenTime management. 4. Stress management.
I. Title.
HQ759.48.L46 2005
158.1'085'2'dc22
2005003153
Printed and bound in Canada.
WC 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
For more information about the issues in Time for Me go to:
www.womenworking2000.com
To all those wonderful women who, like myself, forget to put their self-care first!
Special thanks to Laura Epstein, Nubia DuVall, Anne-Marie McGintee, Meghan Harrington, Ellen Griffith, Lydia Wills, and Marcia Markland, who helped make Time for Me a reality, and to Deb Werksman at Sourcebooks, my wonderful editor and champion. Thanks also to all the wonderful women who shared their insights, feedback, and support, shaping the messages we know to be true but often forget.
It's so easy to get distracted by attending to everything and everybody around us that we often forget our own self-care, which we may or may not feel entitled to.
Among a woman's basic needs are food, clothing, shelter, passion, friendship, and fun.
Yes, fun! It lightens our burdens and gives us new perspectives. It frees our minds to face challenging situations, while knowing that we can handle anything that comes along.
Time for Me is written in two partsthe first part is a simple story about Ms. Owl's adventures. It is meant to charm, delight, and bring home profound insights that we all need to reflect upon. Part Two is a 4-step program to help you maintain your sparkle in everyday life.
It's hard for me to confess this to you, but I know many of you will understand what I'm about to say. Did you ever look in the mirror and despite all the makeup you put on, something wasn't right? Well, that happened to me. When I looked at my face, although everything was the same, I noticed that my eyes had lost their sparkle.
As a woman, I wear many hatsTV host, executive producer, panel moderator, life-coach, author, mother, friend, and daughter. It makes me tired to name all of them! I'm a virtual doer, with very little time to just be (you know what I mean). Many people come to me for adviceI help busy women set their priorities straight. Unfortunately, I had forgotten the value of what I preach because I hadn't applied it to my own life.
I wrote this book to remind myself of what I already know and was amused and recharged in the process. The central character you will meet is Ms. Owl. She is committed to moving ahead at work while raising her owlet, Oohie, whom she loves. The problem is that with all of her responsibilities, she's put herself last on the list for too long. And, as a result, she's lost that inner sparkle.
It was a delight for me to live vicariously through Ms. Owl's adventures. When I started to write this, I hadn't taken a much-needed vacation. Yet as I explored the fantasy of Ms. Owl's experiences at the Golden Nest Retreat Center, I was reenergized. In fact, after I wrote the book, I took some time off.
At the Golden Nest, Ms. Owl attends Quick Coach sessions, gets healing treatments, and meets some new friends. During her stay there, she has many realizations that change her life significantly. The practical wisdom in this book comes from the work I've done with women on assertiveness training, life-stage planning, and stress reduction. In Part Two, the 4-step program will help you gain perspective as you assess your priorities and goals.
I hope you enjoy reading Time for Me as much as I enjoyed writing it. But more important, the simple truths contained here are profound. If you take them to heart, they will change your life, too!
I t was a dark winter's night with snow falling softly. Ms. Owl was perched on the top branch of the treeworking late as usual. All the other branches were empty because her coworkers had gone home. Once again, she was the only one left.
Her face appeared majestic in the moonlight. She had a few more gray feathers than when she had started at the company seasons ago, but her warm, friendly demeanor hadn't changed. She was proud to work for Owl USA, one of the oldest information providers, as an assistant to Boss Owl. Her willingness to help without complaining made her well liked by the male officers at the corporate roost.
But look more closely: she seemed tiredno, not tireda bit sad. Something was wrong. A significant birthday was coming up in two days, and life felt bittersweet. She didn't feel like celebrating, even though she had a lot to be grateful for.
Back at her nest, she was raising Oohie, whom she adored. Unfortunately, her mate, Mr. Owl, wasn't home much, working the night shift at the airlines. So the brunt of the nest work fell on her. She tried to manage it all, but at what price? Her eyes had lost their sparkle.
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