BRIDGES
Reuniting
Daughters & Daddies
Jonetta Rose Barras
BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF
WHATEVER HAPPENED TO DADDY'S LITTLE GIRL?
Copyright 2005 by Jonetta Rose Barras. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by electronic means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the publisher, except by a reviewer, who may quote passages in a review.
Published by Bancroft Press (Books that enlighten)
P.O. Box 65360, Baltimore, MD 21209
800-637-7377
410-764-1967 (fax)
www.bancroftpress.com
ISBN 1-890862-38-X paper
Library of Congress Control Number: 2004117379
SUBJECTS OF BOOK:
non-fiction/self-help/family relations/fathers/daughters
Cover and interior design by Tammy Sneath Grimes
www.tsgcrescent.com, 814.941.7447
Author photo by Bruce McNeil
For Afrika, Umoja, the choir of wounded women who sing the fatherless dirge, and the fathers who hum their own painful tunes about their daughters absence
ALSO BY JONETTA ROSE BARRAS
Whatever Happened to Daddys Little Girl?
The Impact of Fatherlessness on Black Women.
New York: One World/Ballantine Publishing Group, 2000.
Last of the Black Emperors:
The Hollow Comeback of Marion Barry in
the New Age of Black Leaders.
Baltimore: Bancroft Press, 1998.
The Corner is No Place for Hiding.
Washington, D.C.: Forest Woods Productions, Inc., 1996.
All available at http://www.jrbarras.com
REQUESTS FOR AUTHOR APPEARANCES,
AS A SPEAKER OR WORKSHOP FACILITATOR,
CONTACT:
ESTHER PRODUCTIONS, INC.
P.O. Box 21477
Washington, D.C. 20009
(202) 882-2838
jrb@jrbarras.com
or
bruceb@bancroftpress.com
PRAISE FOR JONETTA ROSE BARRAS
Bridges: Reuniting Daughters & Daddies
I firmly believe that daughters have a hole in their soul in their fathers shape, and when dads are unwilling or unable to fill it, there remains a painful, and often, lifelong wound. Jonettas book is an empowering resource to aid women during the much needed healing process. Indeed, its a must read for any woman who longs to be called daddys little girl.ROLAND WARREN, PRESIDENT, NATIONAL FATHERHOOD INITIATIVE
Many fathers served by the South Carolina Center on Fathers and Families fatherhood programs want to reconcile with their child and/or the mother of their child, but do not know how. Seeking professional services, whether from a therapist, psychologist, or psychiatrist, is not a readily accessible or affordable option. Bridges is an insightful and invaluable resource for such fathers. Because its easy to read, and proceeds step-by-step, I highly recommend it to anyone interested in reconciling a relationship or just wanting to learn more about the process of reconciliation. But I particularly recommend it for any two people seeking a simple, down-to-earth structure for and positive reinforcement duringthe reconciliation pilgrimage.DR. IRENE LUCKEY, ASSOCIATE PROFESSOR, INSTITUTE FOR FAMILIES IN SOCIETY, UNIVERSITY OF SOUTH CAROLINA
When my father saw his final days ahead of him, I was serving as a warden at a womens prison. Though theyd never met my father, and I dont doubt for one moment that the women prisoners were sincerely concerned for me and my family, the grief they expressed to me, and the tears they shed with me, were really based on their own sense of loss over the yearstheir loss of self-respect, and their lost connections to children, fathers, and mothers. When my mother died, I was warden at a men's prison. There, I witnessed the same unpredictable and priceless response from 1,200 men. What a privilege it is for me, then, to share this important work with readers. Jonetta Rose Barras Bridges recognizes that we can ill afford to believe that lifelong relationships can simply be picked up and continued whenever the incarcerated return to our communities. Where theres life, its been said, there must be hope. To help damaged and fragile people hoping to reconnect with their families, we must do all we can. The incarcerated are, after all, related directly or indirectly to each of us. They are our sisters, sons, cousins, parents, nieces, and daughters. Our effort to reunite families, enhanced and furthered by this essential book, is an exceedingly worthwhile investment, for when we save our families, we also save our communities. Our society deserves nothing less.MARY LEFTRIDGE BYRD, DEPUTY SECRETARY, DEPARTMENT OF CORRECTIONS, COMMONWEALTH OF PENNSYLVANIA
Jonetta Rose Barras writes about the impact of fatherlessness with a passion and candor that cannot be ignored. She opens up her heart to her audience so everyone may share the rewards of healing and reconciliation. Bridges: Reuniting Daughters and Daddies is the book we were hoping Jonetta would write.DEE BAECHER-BROWN, PRESIDENT, COMMUNITY FOUNDATION OF THE VIRGIN ISLANDS
Jonetta Rose Barras latest book is a must-read and logical follow-up to her Whatever Happened to Daddy's Little Girl? It's not only a powerful, timely, and groundbreaking roadmap in the journey toward healing, but easily transferable beyond daddies and daughtersto all others in need of reconciliation.DARRYL GREEN, MS, CASEY FAMILY SERVICES, THE DIRECT SERVICE ARM OF THE ANNIE E. CASEY FOUNDATION
The day before her wedding, my daughter and sat alone, briefly reflecting on the years that seemed to pass so quickly as she grew to womanhood. As our conversation wound down, she presented me with a framed photo of me holding her when she was just four days old. The accompanying note stated in part,... Even though Ill be a married woman soon, Ill always be Daddy's Girl. It touched me at such a deep emotional level that I choked up and was rendered speechless. Jonetta Rose Barras has given us all an insightful and incisive analysis of the unique, vital, and profoundly personal relationship between fathers and daughters. And she has crafted a perceptive and practical road map to achieve reconciliation when those relationships become frayed and estranged. Hats off to Jonetta for filling the gaping information void in how to repair father-daughter relationshipsand for understanding how emotionally perilous the journey to reconciliation is.VINCENT C. GRAY, COUNCILMEMBER, DISTRICT OF COLUMBIA
Jonetta Rose Barras has courageously reached into the dark agony of her own odyssey of self-analysis and produced a deeply personal and highly sensitive guidebook that leads the rest of us out of the wounded places in our hearts along a bright path to healing and redemption. This book is not only a tool to cure the anguished relationship between a father and a daughter, but can also be used to mitigate the ongoing emotional war between Black women and the men in their lives.BROOKE STEPHENS, AUTHOR/EDITOR, MEN WE CHERISH: AFRICAN-AMERICAN WOMEN PRAISE THE MEN IN THEIR LIVES
Too much of today's conversation is about father absence and not enough about healing oneself from the effects. Jonetta Rose Barras has gotten out front by transitioning the conversation to father-healing and providing step-by-step support. Her book will also help men understand and support the women in their lives whove suffered from father absence.RICHARD L. BROWN, VOLUNTEER, THE FATHERHOOD COLLABORATIVE, COMMUNITY FOUNDATION OF THE VIRGIN ISLANDS