Nabil Fanous - The Universal Rules of Life: 27 Secrets for Managing Time, Stress, and People

The Universal Rules of Life

27 Secrets for Managing Time, Stress & People

Nabil Fanous, M.D.

This book is dedicated to the memory of my beloved parents, who taught me, over the years, many of the rules in this book.

Special thanks to my son, Michael John Fanous, for providing precious insights during the whole writing process.

T his book has been in the making for ages.

As a surgeon, teacher, son, husband, and father, I sometimes feel as if Ive been studying human psychology my entire life, trying to understand how the world works and how to effectively navigate through it. From the time I was a boy, I was observant and curious about people, and tried to understand what they did and why they did it.

Growing up in Heliopolis, a leafy suburb of Cairo, I attended Le Collge de la Sainte Famille, a respected Jesuit Christian institution run by French monks. The Fathers, or Pres as we called them, were incredibly erudite. They were well versed in the sciences, literature, and the arts. They worked us hard, from 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. Although they were quite strict with us, we knew that they nonetheless cared for us immensely and were fully committed to our academic and spiritual development.

The Fathers were valuable mentors as well. They spent time with us after school hours, discussing books and poetry, listening to the musical compositions of many European masters, and analyzing German and Italian operas. It was a well-rounded education that instilled in me a love of the arts that lasts to this day.

I was quite fortunate that this wide-ranging educational environment was complemented by a warm and loving atmosphere at home. Both spheres of my early life contributed to the values that fill these pages.

My father, a physician, was a role model. He was easygoing, always wearing a big smile, and seemingly the happiest person on earth. A kindhearted man, he saw the good in everyone and everything. Even when our finances were tight at times, Dad, a devout Christian, donated generously to charities and never worried about money. He exuded faith and optimism. Overall, my father instilled in me a love of life and a reverence for God.

My mother, on the other hand, had a serious and calculating personality. She was blessed with a sharp intelligence and a photographic memory, and had remarkable critical faculties. She exhibited shrewdness and strength, blended with her own brand of love and devotion. Above all, she was filled with profound wisdom about life. Overall, my mother taught me the virtues of hard work and meticulous attention to detail, and she motivated me to excel in any way I could. She coached me on the art of principled thinking, the techniques of effective communication, and the value of moderation in all things.

In order to remain an honor student, I had no choice but to study continually, even on weekends. However, I also wanted to experience some of my fathers joie de vivre approach: to enjoy reading novels, reciting poetry, listening to music, and communing with nature. I also wanted to indulge my passion for painting and playing squash.

So, with all this to do, I had to figure out how to find the time to accomplish everything. Thats when I began looking for ways to more effectively manage my time and the different aspects in my life. And, I guess, that was when this book started to take shape.

I began by reading several works of history, philosophy, biography, and self-help. In essence, when you think about it, all those books were really nothing but opinions based on other peoples experiences, including their mistakes and what they learned from them. The lessons these books taught me were infinitely precious to me over the years. Through them, I learned from other peoples mistakes. Slowly, I began to see that there are certain ways of behaving, responding and organizing that can make life easier, less stressful, and more enjoyable.

Two of my rules were born.

In addition to reading, I also eagerly reached out to people I respected, including my school mentors and my parents, seeking their advice. And I always took notes diligently (one of my own little secrets in life!), and, most important, reviewed them regularly.

More of my rules followed.

Throughout my life, I tried to act like a sponge, absorbing other peoples opinions. I have always believed that everyone I meet has a unique pearl of wisdom to share. I learned enormously from the comments and casual conversations with friends, acquaintances, patients, students, and colleagues. I also had (and still have) a habit of learning valuable information from people Ive only met once, such as waiters, taxi drivers, shopkeepers, salespeople, housekeepers, and hotel staff. Even when I heard someone express what first seemed like an outrageous opinion, I always took it seriously and evaluated it, at least for few seconds (another one of my little secrets in life). Some of the most ridiculous notions often turn out to be gems of wisdom in disguiseout-of-the-box inspiration delivered off the cuff.

My list of rules was getting longer.

When I joined McGill University as an associate professor, I taught facial plastic and reconstructive surgery, which showed me how rewarding it is to help restore patients self-esteem and sometimes, in the process, change lives.

Later, I started to share a small number of these rules with my post-graduate students in the form of an extra-curriculum course. It was an instant success. Students were both entertained and struck by the rules simple effectiveness. This encouraged me to add more of them to my list. Soon thereafter, I was invited to deliver McGills Annual James Baxter Lecture, a special event attended by the other professors in my department. The warm response to the first twelve rules, which I incorporated into my talk, encouraged me to start giving presentations about them at various medical conferences.

And as time passed, the rules list kept getting longer and longer still.

Fast-forward to today.

After years of talking about and sharing my rules with students and conference attendees, I finally decided to compile them all into a book.

So, here they are, the 27 Rulesa series of techniques and strategies that will help you feel happier, become more successful, and cultivate better relationships, leading to a greater sense of well-being and peace.

These rules have some amazing benefits:

• You will discover the secrets of how to dissolve procrastination and achieve things now;
• You will learn how to eliminate, delegate, or shrink tasks to streamline your daily life;
• You will master the arts of unitasking and automated living;
• You will understand how to plant the seeds of smart communication and reap the rewards;
• You will discover the transformative power of posture and gaze, and the impact of physical presentation;
• You will unveil some of the secrets to glowing health and longevity;
• You will understand the crucial need to trust your instincts in any social situation;
• You will learn how to ask for what you want, and get it 50% of the time;
• You will discover the power of listening first and talking second;
• You will learn why silence is sometimes your best reply;
• You will see the ways in which gratitude can transform your life;
• You will recognize how living in the moment is one of the most powerful paths to fulfillment.