David J. Pollay - The 3 Promises: Find Joy Every Day. Do What You Love. Make A Difference.

FIND JOY EVERY DAY.
DO WHAT YOU LOVE.
MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

DAVID J. POLLAY

STERLING and the distinctive Sterling logo are registered trademarks of Sterling Publishing Co., Inc.

2014 by David J. Pollay

David Saltzmans journal entry was used with permission by The Jester Co., Inc., Copyright 1995 by The Jester Co., Inc. All rights reserved.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means (including electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without prior written permission from the publisher.

ISBN 978-1-4549-1544-7

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Interior design by Christine Heun

Original cover design by Katie Otis

Sterling cover design by David Ter-Avanesyon

For Dawn, Eliana, and Ariela

For Jerriann and Louis

For Mike

Promises are the uniquely human way of ordering the future, making it predictable and reliable to the extent that this is humanly possible.

Hannah Arendt

Ive uncovered the path to fulfillmenta whole new way of living that gives you sustainable joy, career satisfaction, and the power to make a difference in other peoples lives, simply by making these three daily promises to yourself.

Find Joy Every Day.

Do What You Love.

Make a Difference.

When I meet people who are genuinely thoughtful about their lives, many admit to feeling somewhat resigned to not having as much happiness, meaningful work, and connections with others as they might wish. Do you want your life to be as richly fulfilling as your dreams but doubt your ability and means to accomplish this?

Im here to tell you that your dreams are within your graspand you dont have to settle for anything less. I want you to be happy now and to commit today to building the life you want for the future. You can live an extraordinary life. My mission is to show you how to craft and experience a fulfilling life every day.

When I uncovered the 3 Promises, I realized something: Feeling unhappy felt bad, but feeling unfulfilled felt even worse. Its one thing to feel unhappy, but its a lot worse to feel that youre squandering your natural strengths, wasting opportunities to help others, and missing times to be joyful with the people you love and care about. But it doesnt have to be this way. After years of practicing positive psychology in major corporations and with people from more than 100 countries, I have learned that engaging in fulfilling activities on a daily basis is what truly leads to happiness.

Do the things that bring you joy. Happiness will come.

Do the things that you love to do. Happiness will come.

Do the things that make a difference to others.

Happiness will come.

When you live a fulfilling life, you will be happy. Thats awesome news, because it means that you are not locked into a limited, predetermined amount of happiness, either by your genes or the constraints of the past. It means youre not at the mercy of other peoples moods, attitudes, and behaviors (or your own, for that matter), and youre not the victim of circumstances. It means youre free free to live a fulfilling life. When, you might ask? The answer is now!

So many of us get lost in other peoples opinions about what fulfillment is, or is not, and get confused by the lack of agreement on the criteria we should use to measure it. This lack of clarity can leave us feeling dissatisfied, anxious, or depressed.

When you look back at previous weeks and tease out the days, can you say which ones were happy? If it takes an effort to remember, or if youre simply not sure what you were feeling, youre not alone: Most of us do not have a clear idea of what makes up a happy day or a happy life. If your definition of fulfillment is based on securing a better job, a more supportive spouse, better health, friendlier neighbors, or more cooperative co-workers, these criteria might make it harder, and take longer, to attain your dream of a happier, more fulfilled life.

The good news is that achieving fulfillment does not need to be a laborious process that takes a lifetime to complete, nor does it boil down unrealistically to feeling happy all day long.

Fulfillment is finding joy in your day, every day. No matter your situation, you deserve a smile, a laugh, a huga simple break from the days demands and responsibilities. Fulfillment is about doing something that expresses what you love to do each daythe thing youre most passionate aboutthrough your work, your relationships, your hobbies.

And you dont have to quit your job and leave your family for a year to search for your purpose in life. Fulfillment is about making a difference every dayconsciously thinking of opportunities beyond your immediate self-interest to give to others.

No matter what your circumstances are, I want the story you tell yourself and others to be one of fulfillment. I want your life story to be one of joy, self-expression, and contribution.

Life can be hard. You will face disappointment, disease, and death at some point; at other times you may feel discouragement, depression, or despair. You can try to mask what makes you sad, angry, and hurt, but you cannot remove these feelings from your lifethe reality is that theyll come and go as events occur in your life.

But through it all, your life has a distinct story line. As I am writing this book, you are living your story. You are interpreting events in your past, situations in the present, and possibilities in the future. Your story guides your actions every day, and it influences others every day. Knowing that your story is not fixed and is written anew every day, I have a bold ambition for you and a big request: I ask you to look at your life through the lens of the 3 Promises in order to Find Joy Every Day, Do What You Love, and Make a Difference.

This book is about your fulfillment at home, at work, and in your community. Its about the good life you deserve. Its your encouragement to live a fulfilling life now. Not later in the year. Not tomorrow. Starting today.