Suzan D. Johnson Cook - Too Blessed to Be Stressed: Words of Wisdom for Women on the Move

Too

B lessed

to Be

S tressed

Too

B lessed

to Be

S tressed

DR. SUZAN D. JOHNSON COOK

1998 by Dr. Suzan Johnson Cook

All rights reserved. Written permission must be secured from the publisher to use or reproduce any part of this book, except for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles.

Published in Nashville, Tennessee, by Thomas Nelson. Thomas Nelson is a registered trademark of Thomas Nelson, Inc.

Unless otherwise noted, Scripture quotations are from THE NEW KING JAMES VERSION, Copyright 1979, 1980, 1982, 1990, Thomas Nelson, Inc., Publishers.

Scripture quotations noted KJV are from the KING JAMES VERSION.

Scripture quotations noted NIV are from the HOLY BIBLE: NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION, Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 by International Bible Society. Used by permission of Zondervan Publishing House. All rights reserved.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Johnson Cook, Suzan D. (Suzan Denise), 1957
Too blessed to be stressed : words of wisdom for women on the
move.
p. cm.

ISBN 0-7852-7070-1

1. WomenReligious life. 2. Stress (Psychology)Religious
aspectsChristianity. 3. Johnson Cook, Suzan D. (Suzan Denise),
1957 . I. Title.
BV4527.J65 1998
248.8'43DC21

9745839
CIP

1 2 3 4 5 6 QPK 03 02 01 00 99 98

Printed in the United States of America

Dedication

To the many women who have blessed my life, especially

my sister-friends:
Nina, Darnita, Linda, Yoki, Alexis, Cora,
Sonnie, Naomi, Mae, and Carol

my seven daughters in ministry:
Sheila, Henrietta, Carolyn, Valerie,
Gladys, Leatha, and Annette

my prayer partners:
Melody and Mercedes

my church sisters from Rendall Memorial Presbyterian,
Union Baptist, Mariners Temple Baptist,
and Bronx Christian Fellowship

my family:
Mom, Jessica, Tina, Lucille, Louise,
Lydia, Bertha, and Jackie

Theresa, who cares for my children when I am on the move,

and to the loving memory of Mama, Bee, and Katherine

Contents

F irst and foremost, I praise God for the wonderful journey of life and ministry I have had.

There are many to whom I give thanks. My parents, Dorothy and the late Wilbert T. Johnson, were Christians, visionaries, community activists, and agents of love who prepared me for and shared me with the world. It has been a long way from living in a walk-up tenement apartment on Harlems l44th Street to flying on Air Force One as an advisor to the president of the United States. To God be the glory!

Because my parents often shared our home with others, I have learned to share what I have, including my faith stories and lifes lessons. This book is a sharing experience and a testament of faith as I continue to evolve into the woman God would have me to be.

I am amazed how God brings the right people together at the right time. Truly there are matches made in heaven; I am a living witness. So I send much love to the men in my life, who love me unconditionally as we build our family and a lasting legacy of love: my husband, Ron, my prayer partner and soul mate, who reminds me that it is all right to be the recipient of roses, but it is also important to take the time to smell them; and our two sons, Samuel David and Christopher Daniel, who remind me how pleasurable, honorable, and regal it is to be a mommy.

I cannot write any book without acknowledging the matriarchs and patriarchs of our family, the role models and foundation builders who prayed for me and encouraged me at every juncture, who taught me to hold my ground while standing on Holy Ground, who admonished me to never compromise my faith or my heritage.

I certainly thank Thomas Nelson Publishers for giving these words a chance to become flesh. My heartfelt appreciation is extended to Lois de la Haba, my literary agent, as well as Rolf Zettersten, Janet Thoma, Connie Reece, and all the wonderful people who advised and prayed with and for me through this process.

More love also goes out to the other men and women in my life: to my brother, Ronald, and Tina; to my only niece and nephew, Jessica and Charles Jr.; and to the New Dream TeamMae and James Jones, Coral Aubert, Annette Cox, Sissy Peoples, Maharold Peoples, Willie Phipps, Grace Samuels, the Reverends Rodney Brooks and Ruth Ransom, Douglas Banks, and the entire Bronx Christian Fellowship family, who have allowed my gifts in ministry to soar without limits and who have helped my joy for ministry to return.

Finally, I offer a special thanksgiving to God for those in the Yankee Stadium area of the Bronx who have embraced me and welcomed me back home. I am remarkably blessed.

CHAPTER ONE
Too Blessed to
Be Stressed

I m Sujay, and I need an entire month off. The words tumbled out with a laugh.

In that awkward millisecond while my brain was processing what to say next, I scanned the room. A dozen women had gathered around a conference table in the library of the stately Convent Avenue Baptist Church. The group of sister ministers met monthly for encouragement and fellowship. With so few women in ministry, and even fewer black women, the peer group was invaluable.

Before I could come up with my next line, the moderator, a Christian counselor named Doris, spoke up. Say that again, please.

Perhaps she didnt hear me, I thought. So I complied. Im Sujay, and I need an entire month off.

Doris had started the meeting by asking each woman to introduce herself and share something she needed in her ministry. Usually we spoke about our accomplishments and goals, the successful sermons, the people we had helped. We were all new in our ministries and excited to have embarked on a great adventure with God.

But this day the conversation had taken an introspective turn. The two or three women who preceded me spoke of resources they lacked or advice they needed. They opened up about problems they were facing.

Not Suzan Sujay Johnson. When my turn came, I tried to make a joke out of it. Me? Admit a struggle? It wasnt in my nature. I was born with a winning attitude. When I reach for a star, I always manage to grab one. My dreams are bigger than I amthats big because Im almost six feet talland the word defeat is not in my vocabulary.

My attempt at humor bombed.

Doris wasnt laughing. Say that again, she insisted.

Why is she singling me out to mess with me? I was aggravated, but I said it again: I need an entire month off. And when I heard myself say it for the third time, it finally dawned on me that it wasnt funny at all. I really did need a month off.

In my early twenties, with tons of energy, I thought I could do it allI thought I had to do it all. Somehow I had equated being a leader with making myself indispensable. So I worked seven days a week. And because I was single, I placed few boundaries on my private time or space; others placed no boundaries at all.

Tell me more about it, Doris said.

Well, Ive just completed my first year of pastoring.

I guess I really am tired. I havent taken a vacation, but I really cant.

What did you say you need, Sujay?

I said I need a month off. But... I started making excuses.

Take the month off, Doris said.

The others chimed in. If you need a month, take a month.

I protested a while longer, but I had to admit I was exhausted. I had been working nonstop. All my hard work had paid off, though. Under my leadership, in just six months Mariners Temple had grown from fifteen tired saints to more than 150 people of all ages who were enthusiastic about church and eager to hear Gods Word.