Trey Hamilton - The First Date Fix : How to have great first dates!

The First Date Fix

Copyright 2022 Trey Richard Hamilton.

All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

Printed by Amazon., in the United States of America.

First printing, 2022

Publisher: Patrick and Chenebert

www.thefirstdatefix.com

Obligatory Intro

D ating. A practice thats been around for goodness knows how long. The funny thing is, even though its been around for centuries. The same principles and linear conventionalities remain more or less the same. For real, not much has really changed. Date someone, fall in love, long-term relationship, marriage, or a lifelong partnership. Sounds simple right? The formula hasnt changed that much.

Despite everyone wanting the same thing. The process has become far more convoluted than it ever has been. But, you can get off to the greatest start possible. It all begins with One. First. Date. Personally, Im a fan of first dates. The excitement of not knowing where its going to go, who the person really is, and the sheer joy and hope of them possibly being the one. There really is nothing quite like a great first date.

Like anything else, you must have a fun, exciting, and memorable beginning. The first minutes of a sports game, that three-pointer gently grazing the net and that wonderful sound of swish. The first intro of a movie, the start of a track and field race. The gun BANGS! And theyre off, the plane taking off on a runway, that television season premiere, the start of a drag race, the beginning of a book, the start of a classic commercial, and so forth. Did you know 85% of hiring managers know if theyre going to hire someone in the first 10 minutes of conversation? 10 minutes! WTF. The first impression always matters.

Always.

You have a limited amount of time on any first date. One hour, maybe two. You should always start out the way you hope to continue.

First dates are important.

Who can forget the opening scene in Indian Jones: Raiders of the Lost Ark? (Dun the dun dahhhhh dun dah duhhhh) Or Bohemian Rhapsody by Queen (Is this the real life?) What about Uptown Funk'' with Bruno Mars? (Doh, do do dooo do) Or the first episode of Game of Thrones or the first man on the moon? These are things that are etched in your memory. Firsts and beginnings matter and they have a long-lasting effect if done correctly. Every first date you have enables a chance. A chance to make sure you leave with the best possible outcome and spread good vibes throughout the dating universe.

The person whos most sought after will always have an abundance of suitors laying in wait. So you have an opportunity to stand out amongst the conventional and pretty mundane crowd. Youre unique, youre different and I want them to see that within you!

Thats kinda cool when you really think about it.

First impressions really are everything. In an article by the Psychological Association of Science, they mention that it only takes 3 seconds for someone to size you up in terms of attractiveness and trustworthiness. Granted this is only based on our preconceived historical data based on cognitive biases and filters weve built over the years. But it happens. Which is bloody crazy when you think about it. I found myself thinking why even show up if its going to be that quick. This is why its so important to not leave impressions to chance! To dazzle them immediately and make sure you hit the ground in a glorious sprint that leaves them hanging on your every word!

Will they think Im funny? Like what outfit I have on? What about my job, what if they think its average? Will they like my shoes? Cute little bangs I spent 80 bucks on? The list goes on.

Dating can be such an energetic and exciting process or it can be something that causes mass and copious amounts of anxiety. Dating can be socially and emotionally draining to a point where you want to say, the hell with it and become a frickin nun. Fear not I can help you get through this! The wonderful and simple truth is, literally anyone can become a fantastic dater and be a delight to anyone they go on a date with. All you need is a willing and positive change of paradigm, the courage to overcome some inevitable fears, and your WHY. Why have you decided to start dating? What do you really want? Why is it important to you?

As you read this book and put many thoughts and practices here into action. Youll have the skills to go out there and bag that dream partner! If you become good at dating, its not about being a player, serial dater, or person whos out for the chase. No way! This book is more about refining some skills so you heighten and extend the chances of finding someone youre the most compatible with. Its about giving yourself a fighting chance to succeed or at least get closer to someone you long to be with and know you deserve. Its also about having FUN! If youre genuinely in a position where youre having fun, you really will be a good date. Fun ideas, fun experiences, and memories you create with someone that will last you a lifetime.

I want this for you. I know the joy that came when I connected with someone I still feel incredibly lucky to be with. I want the same for you. I know you can get it.

I truly do. Im very excited about all of your possibilities and I want you to be excited too! Its not as doom and gloom as some of these atrocious negative dating blogs like to promote. There are good people out there! I promise.

Weve all heard the old gurus of dating, theres the corny love doctors out there and seedy pick up artists asking you to go to their seminar and pay $3,000 dollars to learn their shit. Or the Instagram gurus who ask you to pay $2000 dollars just to attend a webinar with this, One sentence that will change everything. Well, forget all that nonsense. Im not a guru. Im sure as hell, not a self-proclaimed dating expert. I dont know how anyone could be. Human beings are so nuanced how could one possibly be an expert on what 7 billion people are attracted to?

Ive had bad first dates and quite frankly some amazing first dates. You see, about 8 years ago I got out of a pretty bad and loveless marriage (We married young and didnt really end up liking each other too much) Ill tell you one thing. About 7 months after my divorce when I decided to officially throw my hat in the ring and start dating again. I got torn apart. I literally had no idea of how the dating world functioned anymore and I wasnt prepared. I did some stupid things I didnt even know were killing attraction. I was out there looking like a complete moron. Here are some of the silly things I did or didnt do.

Waited till the 5th date to go in for a first kiss

Spoke to much

Sent wayyyyy too many texts and phone calls

Failed to read the signs

Didnt pay for the first date all the time

Couldnt read good body language

Tried to hard

Told to much

Read too much into things

Dated too many people at the same time

Jumped into relationships quickly!

Projected previous pains onto a potential partner

Selfish as hell

Over compensated

Bragged

Never took anyone seriously

Kept comparing to my ex

Drank my own Cool aid

Partied too hard (Yes there are limits)

Ive spent 7years of toiling away in the dating wastelands trying to find out who I am and what I truly want. Like I said before, I'm not a dating guru or a specified psychologist. But I am someone who has been on a considerable amount of first dates because Im serious about my quest to find my life partner. Ive learned so much about dating within that time but I realized before I wrote this book it had to be bigger than me and all my zany experiences. So Im here to give it to you straight accompanied by some nerdy research Ive done.