Nora Lourie Percival - Silver Pages on the Lawn: A Student Love Story of the Depression Years of the 1930s

SILVER PAGES ON THE LAWN

A True Story of Student Love During the 1930s

by

Nora Lourie Percival
&
Herman Gund

Kent Hollow Press

Kent Hollow Press

478 Greer Lane

Vilas, NC 28692

Copyright by Nora Lourie Percival. All rights reserved.

Drawings by Danielle Bussone

Cover Watercolors

of the Authors

by A S. Packer

Percival, Nora 1914

Silver Pages on the Lawn: A True Story of
Student Love During the 1930s

ISBN 1-59513-010-1

2004114722

First Printing, February 2005
Second Printing, July 2006

This book is
dedicated to

Herman Gund,

who should have
written it,
and whose words, in fact, fill
so many
of its pages
a gifted poet,
a faithful lover,
a gentle
man.

Though this work is the creation of just two people -- one living and one dead -- I must include my thanks to the old friends who shared those days with us, and whose memories enlarged and infused my own.

The encouragement and support of my family was precious to me. Their interest connects my story to the generations whose lives were partly shaped by it.

My gratitude also goes to schuyler kaufman and Judy Geary for their invaluable help in the production of the book.

The old wing chair welcomed me like a mothers lap. Over the years its springs and stuffing had shaped themselves perfectly to my own. After a day of dull errands and small irritations, the comfort of getting off my feet and into my favorite seat was palpable. Sighing, I relaxed into it, turned the TV on to Murder, She Wrote, my pet late-afternoon diversion, and let my thoughts roam as a commercial droned on.

The tinkle of the sleigh-bells hanging on my front door broke into my meanderings. Now who could that be? Just a minute, Im coming, I grumbled, as my granddaughter Emma burst through the unlatched door like a spring breeze.

Surprise and pleasure at seeing one of my favorite people wiped away my sulk at once. I reached up my arms for Emmas hug. What a surprise! Is it vacation time already, darling? Or is something wrong?

Emma patted me and pulled over my footstool to sit beside me. No, but we had a long weekend, and I was missing home. I took a day or two off from classes, to make the drive worthwhile. How are you, Nana? You look tired.

Its just my end-of-the-day feeling. Im really fine. I scanned the dear face leaning against my knee. But you dont sound so good. Are you unhappy?

Emma looked up. You mean it shows? I didnt think it would. Well, yeah. Kenny and I broke up last week. And I dont really know why. Oh, Nana, its so hard to understand. Whats wrong with me?

Wrong with you? Theres nothing wrong with you. I bent and hugged Emmas head. Are you really sad, darling? Do you actually love this this blockhead?

She shrugged. I dont know, Nana. I thought I did. Her look seemed to search for answers. Im beginning to think theres no way to truly know what a person is like inside. I thought he was a man I knew, a man I could care about and trust.

But what happened, honey? What did he do to make you break up?

He told me he didnt love me not enough to form a serious commitment. He just wanted to be friends, he said. Friends! What kind of bullshit is that? I loved him! Emma looked up, expecting reproof.

Trying to find words that might counter my childs anger, I ignored the offensive expletive. Perhaps its only that he isnt ready to be serious. Hes pretty young, after all. He may just need to grow up a little.

But it makes me feel so terrible. Because I did love him maybe I still do, though I dont want to. It it makes me feel cheap, somehow, that he made me love him and then just dropped me.

Oh, thats a terrible feeling, I said. Even after all the years, I still remembered the demeaning pain of loving and not being loved back. How lucky Id been to have found a true love, a love I could trust.

Oh, he tried to be kind, Emma admitted. Its not you, he told me. Its me. I need some time to get hold of my life. But thats not good enough. He was plenty sure where his life was going when he was trying to sell me on our living together.

My eyebrows went up. Were you buying? I asked quietly. The question coaxed a crooked smile from the pursed lips. What a nice subtle way to put it, Nana. No, I wasnt. Im not sure why, but I felt I just wasnt ready for that, you know?

Yes, darling, I know exactly. You were right. The only time youre ready is when you know beyond any doubt that you are.

Now it was Emmas eyebrows that flew up. Thats pretty advanced thinking, Nana! I wouldnt have thought it of you.

Indeed! So you think your generation invented love affairs? Well, even back before I was old enough, people were talking about free love and companionate marriage and all that. Only the names change. Young people have had to make emotional decisions and sexual ones ever since well, ever since weve had two sexes, I guess.

Emmas grin faded. But thats not why we broke up, Im sure. Its just that suddenly Kenny was somebody I didnt know. I thought that that, you know, our minds and our hearts were in tune. And all at once he was a stranger, somebody I didnt feel any connection with. Love cant ever feel like that, I dont think.

No, darling, thats not love. I do know that.

Im getting to feel there actually isnt such a thing as real love. Its all just hype and romantic wishful thinking,

Oh, baby, dont ever believe that. True love is the best part of living. And it does exist.

Emma scanned my face, then shook her head. Its a different world now, Nana. Maybe when you were young people believed in romantic love, but things sure have changed. My generation is a lot more cynical about it. I guess most of us feel we should just take what we want and enjoy it, but we dont expect any forever stuff, you know.

I took the girls face between my hands and looked into her eyes. I dont think you really believe that, darling. And Im here to tell you that you shouldnt. True abiding love exists will always exist. Ive lived it. And I hope for nothing less for the people I love, because theres nothing more worth living for.

Emma stared curiously at me. You mean you and Granddaddy ? But

No, not Granddaddy. Oh, I loved him, the way you love the man you marry. But a long time ago, when I was just about your age, as a matter of fact, I knew real love the kind that lives forever. And thats the kind of love I want you to wait for, before you commit your heart.

But, Nana If you had that love, how did you lose it?

I sighed. He died.

Oh, Nana! I didnt know.

Of course you did, dear. He was Uncle Peters father. My first husband, Herman Gund.

Oh, I did know he died very young, but I guess it never really registered when I heard about it oh, years ago. I guess I wasnt paying attention. Was it a long time ago?

A very long time ago. We were both students when we met.

But you got to get married and have a baby and

Almost. We had five years together more than two years before we could get married. My father was very set against it, so we had to wait till I finished college and we both found work and could support ourselves. My mind was ranging back to the stressful, wonderful years. He died before Peter was born.

Oh, Nana, was all Emma could say. In her sunlit life death had never been a reality.