Hall - The boomer burden : dealing with your parents lifetime accumulation of stuff

Praise for The Boomer Burden

Maybe the most practical book Ive read in years. This should be on every baby boomers must-read list. A sound, down-to-earth, well-written manual for one of the most difficult subjects to discuss with your parents... and Im including the birds and the bees lecture decades earlier.

BOB HAMER
Veteran FBI Agent and Author,
The Last Undercover

Julie has created a masterpiece on how to help your parents and yourself deal with several very stressful and emotionally charged issues. Julies storytelling of examples garnered over years of working with families guides her readers and creates scenarios that they can easily relate to in their own lives. As a certified financial planner, all of my clients will be given a copy of Julies book as required reading. This book is the most comprehensive and thoughtful work on a difficult and complex aspect of life. A must-read for boomers dealing with everybodys stuff!

ADOLPHUS W. DUNN III
CPA, CFP, AEP

As a personal family lawyer, Ive had to deal with much of the fallout over the issues Julie addresses in her book. Most of us will, at some point, have to care for our parents and their stuff, and it can be an overwhelming burden, but with the information Julie shares, we can avoid many of the potential problems. Julies book provides fantastic insight that helps us anticipate difficulties and find workable solutions.

ALEXIS MARTIN NEELY
Americas Personal Family Lawyer,
www.PersonalFamilyLawyer.com;
and Author, Wear Clean Underwear:
A Fast, Fun, Friendlyand
EssentialGuide to Legal
Planning for Busy Parents

It was sharp-witted Benjamin Franklin who observed that in this world nothing is certain but death and taxes. Now, through the wisdom of Julie Hall, you can add a third: dealing with the aftermath of your parents death. The Boomer Burden is an exceptionally well-written and wise book. Both parents and adult children need the wake-up call that Julie so deftly and confidently offers. It speaks with the voice of experience and comforts with a deep empathy for this painful period of life. Mostly, it offers reassurance that at a time of deep grief, adult children can and must be prepared for lifes third certainty. There is no doubt in my mind that this book is essential reading for both older parents and adult childrenand it will be especially beneficial if they read it together.

ARCHIBALD D. HART, PHD, FPPR
Clinical Psychologist; Senior Professor
of Psychology and Dean Emeritus,
Graduate School of Psychology, Fuller
Theological Seminary; and Author,
Thrilled to Death

The Boomer Burden is an engaging and comprehensive treatment of the end-of-life dynamics between aging parents and aging children. While this book is complete with helpful summaries and checklists, the author also uses engaging anecdotes that exemplify the importance of the process. I will recommend The Boomer Burden to my estate planning clients.

MALVERN KING
Partner, Pulley, Watson,
King & Lischer, P.A., Attorneys at Law

2007 Julie Hall

All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any meanselectronic, mechanical, photocopy, recording, scanning, or otherexcept for brief quotations in critical reviews or articles, without the prior written permission of the publisher.

Published in Nashville, Tennessee, by Thomas Nelson. Thomas Nelson is a registered trademark of Thomas Nelson, Inc.

Published in association with Rosenbaum & Associates Literary Agency, Brentwood, Tennessee.

Thomas Nelson, Inc., titles may be purchased in bulk for educational, business, fund-raising, or sales promotional use. For information, please e-mail SpecialMarkets@ThomasNelson.com.

The Estate Lady is a registered trademark of Julie Hall. Used with permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked NKJV are taken from the New King James Version. 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Scripture quotations marked KJV are taken from the King James Version of the Bible.

This publication is intended to provide authoritative information in regard to the subject matter covered. It is purchased with the understanding that estate laws may vary from state to state and that the publisher is not giving advice nor rendering legal, accounting, or other professional services. If you require legal advice or other expert assistance, you should seek the services of a competent professional in that field.

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Hall, Julie.
The boomer burden : dealing with your parents lifetime accumulation of stuff / Julie Hall.
p. cm.
Includes bibliographical references.
ISBN 978-0-7852-2825-7 (pbk.)
1. Administration of estates. 2. Estate planning. 3. Baby boom generation. 4. Aging parents. I. Title.
HG4319.H35 2008
646.7'8dc22

2008003174

Printed in the United States of America

08 09 10 11 12 RRD 5 4 3 2 1

For all my clientspast, present, and future.

If it werent for you and your families,
I would never have become The Estate Lady.

Thank you for sharing your lives so I could learn
how to serve you in a greater capacity.

Contents

Have you ever heard the saying, When the student is ready, the teacher appears? These are my teachers, to whom I offer my deepest heartfelt appreciation for listening to my stories, understanding the great need for this book, helping me open doors with unbelievable speed, and answering more questions than a roomful of preschoolers could possibly ask.

To my literary agent, Bucky Rosenbaum, and your wife, Joann: Our meeting was not by chance. Helping you and your in-laws during your personal time of need was a privilege. Thank you for seeing the importance of this work and helping me get this book published so my experience can serve others. Thank you for planting the seed.

To my editorial consultant, Lyn Cryderman, who listens more attentively than anyone I know: I thank you for your unwavering support and understanding of how to get whats inside my brain out on paper. I thank you for your gentle guidance along the way. Having already been where the reader is headed, you were invaluable in helping me get the message out there.

To my acquisitions editor, Debbie Wickwire: Your excitement from the moment you saw the proposal has been contagious! Your belief in the critical need for this book and in me is more appreciated than you will ever know.

To my publisher, Joey Paul: Thank you for your kindness and understanding that there is a tremendous need for this book. I am grateful to you and to everyone at Thomas Nelson for this opportunity.

To my editors, Jennifer Stair and Paula Major: Thank you for bringing this book together and making it shine! Your input and changes brought out the best it has to offer.

To Larry Carpenter, Scott Harris, Jennifer Womble, and Beth Hood: a world-class marketing team that has my sincerest heartfelt gratitude for launching The Boomer Burden.

To Jonathan Frank, estate planning attorney in Charlotte, North Carolina: Thank you for your patient assistance and contribution to the cause. You helped us understand the necessary legal documents and the need to be prepared for the inevitable.

To my colleague Jennifer Szakaly, MA, geriatric care manager of CareGiving Corner in Charlotte, North Carolina: Your input and guidance with the early chapters is greatly appreciated, since you work with seniors and their children every day. Thank you for all your good advice.