Dr. Francesca Fajinmi - BLACK MYSTERY: Black Groups Dynamics and Perceptions of White People

My three-year-old grandson said, he was looking more black, and he looked so sad saying it. This was in the summer of 2020, while COVID-19 was ravaging the world. The second global issue: the murder of George Floyd flooded social media. Fortunately, I was telecommuting, so I was working in the safety of my house and did not have to drive through the protests to get to work.

I consult for a large organization in Los Angeles, and my client, who generally meets with her extended team, asked me if I wanted to join her in speaking to her team about the ongoing protests. Her goal was to empathize with them and offer some options to get through the unfortunate national incident. The team was approximately 400 people. I did not hesitate to say yes. She turned to another colleague, a Black man, and asked the same question. He replied by saying, are you sure, because Im going to be raw. I panicked when I heard him. I quickly interrupted, and said, oh no you are not going to be raw; you are not going to agitate them further, you are going to pacify them. He reluctantly agreed. We concluded our normal meeting and parted.

The conversation occurred on a Wednesday, and the presentation was on a Friday. I went about my business, and on Thursday night, I remembered that I needed to say something to the team. I scribbled a few points down, and scanned through it. I felt satisfied. My goal was to inform them to continue what they normally do and be supportive of one another. I thought to myself, if any of my family members walks over or passes by my home office, I will share my thoughts with them.

Just then, my son strolled into the kitchen. He was 23 years old. I walked over to the kitchen and said, eh - Im speaking at work tomorrow, about black stuff big boss wants me to join her. He turned to me and said, mom, you better tell them the truth. I was taken aback. I said, what do you mean? He replied, you better not give them the corporate stuff. My heart started to beat firstly, yes, I was going to give them the corporate stuff, but I have not really looked at it that way, and even if I did, was anything wrong with that?

I jokingly said, you dont know what you are talking about. He didnt let me finish, then he said, Oh yes mom, I do. You need to read what Ben and Jerry wrote about their corporate position. Then he said no, let me read it to you. Then he proceeded to bring it up and read it. He further asked, did you read the letter I sent to my team? By the way, he graduated about two years before with his bachelors and masters in Global Medicine and Global Health. He works as a manager of a Healthcare Consulting firm. His CEO addressed his organization during the protest, and what my son remembered of his message was that, he understands the frustration of Blacks but its difficult because there are no qualified Black people to hold positions of leadership.

Of course, my son was livid, he crafted an email to his team, and informed them that discrimination, racism, and any type of injustices will not be tolerated in his group. This was the email he asked if I had read. He said to me, mom, you are afraid you might lose your position in corporate. I replied sheepishly, you dont understand corporate, he said, mom, if this is what you want me to understand about corporate, then I dont need to. The final words that he left with me were what broke my resolve. He said, mom, just remember one thing: Many people paid with their lives for you to be in your position, if this is all you have to do, then its worth it.