Simarjeet Singh - How to Overcome Anxiety and be Confident

CONTENTS

INTRODUCTION PAGE 2

Chapter 1 PAGE

Chapter 1 PAGE

Chapter 1 PAGE

Chapter 1 PAGE

INTRODUCTION

It is believed by most of the people that confidence is directly related to money. It depends on how much Money you have. If a person is rich he will be more confident than a poor one. But this is a totally, you had seen many people in your everyday life who is not rich but they behave confidently, that can be seen from their way of walking or by the way they talk, stand. It can be seen through their gestures. Instead of money, confidence is directly related to How you treat yourself, what did you think about yourself and most important how you Behave around others.

IN THIS BOOK WE ARE GOING TO COVER ALL THESE THREE ASPECTS.

Before continuing we should discuss how a non confident person behaves in this context. This kind of person behaves in a very odd way. They sit silently in a group of people show poor gestures they fold and interlock their arm and start sweating on their hands. It became easy to check nervousness of a person. This makes other person to show dominance because you invited them by your non confident behavior.

Secondly, they also treat themselves badly. They have very low self worth. Most of the time they Downplays or ignores their positive qualities, Judges themselves to be inferior to their peers, Uses negative words to describe themselves such as stupid, fat, ugly or unlovable, Has discussions with themselves (this is called self talk) that are always negative, critical and self blaming, Assumes that luck plays a large role in all their achievements and doesnt take the credit for them, Blames themselves or situation when things go wrong, Doesnt believe a person who compliments them.

They are also unhappy or unsatisfied with themselves most of the time, and feel awkward or incompetent , they also tend to be hypersensitive. They have a negative perception of oneself can have serious consequences. They are more likely to avoid interactions with others and are quicker to react defensively, cynically, or even lash out.

There are multiple causes that cause nervousness and anxiety.

Family Problems: There are many unfamiliar things happen in family that cause nervousness and anxiety. This is not done in a day. It takes many months or years to get wired in your mind. This is caused by divorce or fight between parents make the child emotionally ill. In this scenario child:

• Being severely disciplined, Being screamed at and ordered around
• Being disregarded
• Being belittled and told you do everything wrong
• Being given high but impossible expectations
• Being told that fortune or luck produces results, so helplessness is the outcome
• Being told that if you fail, youre no good, Being compared unfavorably to siblings or other children, Being neglected

Lack of social interaction: In the childhood Non confident people does not get engage in social gatherings. They try to find some private space and like to escape from gathering. They are not very socially active. They merely like to meet someone. They do not like to engage in games and always stay busy in using digital gadgets.

Bullying: this happens mostly in school. Children who are healthier or have high social status try to bully the weaker one. It is also done by some bad people over cyberspace. Cyber bullying is the use of technology to harass, threaten, embarrass, or target another person. By definition, it occurs among young people.

There are many other causes but all of them move around of these three.

This book is divided in two parts which tells different measures to overcome anxiety and be confident.

Physical: It includes all the gestures or actions done through body. As you all know that our mind controls our behavior. Body works on same way as mind guides it. If anyone feels anxious it can be seen from their actions. It is easy to estimate confidence level of a person through his body language, action they perform in public and by their gestures.

Psychological: this problem is deeply related to our psychologies. The main action should be taken on mind level that last for long. In the psychological part we will discuss what kinds of step that a person should take to overcome anxiety and become confident, it needs a lot of mental power and effort. To overcome anxiety at mind level you have to read this book many times when you feel anxious dont think anything start reading this book and also make short notes which you can revise easily.

Physicals

(Action Speak Louder Than Words)

Our actions are directly related to our confidence if a person is confident it can be seen from their actions. You dont have to tell anyone that you are confident. It is visible through actions and body language. You can easily recognize a person mental status by simple observing them.

There are many ways by which we can show our confidence. It can be seen in how we sit, how we stand and how we walk and most necessary how we dress up.

In this part you learn how the gestures and actions that make a person look nervous and anxious and also suggesting confident gestures.

This part is divided into two parts fort one tells about Low confidence gestures. Which include Eye Blocking, Lip Compression, Freezing, Flight and Rubbing response.

Chapter 1

Low Confidence Gestures

Eye blocking

Eye blocking is the most common non verbal behavior that is seen in all non confident people. Person with eye contact anxiety may feel unable to look directly into other people's eyes when talking. They try to close their eyes by different ways. People do it when they are threatened and feel uncomfortable in a particular situation or around a particular person or maybe in group. People try to hide their eyes by hand or by looking other side. Below are some examples of eye blocking.

You must concentrate on yourself while talking to someone must try to look into eyes of people. Initially start it for few minutes and practice continuously until it become a habit.

Lip Compression

This is seen when a person is under stress and try to avoid some situation or people. When a person feel nervous he will try to hide their lip or by compressing with another lip or by teeth. Lip compression most commonly happen when a person tries to hide true intentions and fell inferior about it. For example, there is a group of people they are planning for a movie everyone gave their opinion about movie but this kind of person dont show their side openly and try to hide their intentions. Here are some example of lip compression.

You must try to avoid this behavior and we will discuss about how to convey intentions easily is psychological part.

Freezing

This is the most common behavior seen in parties and social gatherings; it may be shown by your friend in college party or by anyone other during gathering. The people who show this feel insecure or anxious in a particular situation. People show this when something unpleasant happen or they see someone whom they dont like. It happens because of social anxiety. People dont like to get social and get filled with unknown fear. When someone freezes, their body is trying to protect them. They try to protect them from a particular situation. They will restrict their actions, they avoid any actions from body and try to find some private space. They also avoid standing and some place to sit. They dont move their hand while walking they may put them in pocket or hold something in it or sometimes hold one hand by other. They always look down while walking and their shoulders seen bent forward and Its not a conscious decision , but something out of anyones control until they know about it and try to improve it consciously. You simply have to avoid this response.