Prokopchak Mary - Staying together: marriage: a lifelong affair

ABOUT THE AUTHORS

STEVE and MARY PROKOPCHAK have been married for more than 40 years and have served as marriage and family counselors for much of that time. Their first book, Called Together, is an interactive workbook that has helped thousands of engaged couples from all over the world build a lasting marriage foundation. Steve and Mary have three adult children and two grandchildren, and they reside in Elizabethtown, Pennsylvania.

BOOKS:

The Secret in the Pew: Pornography in the Lives of Christian Men by David A. Blythe

The author draws from his own story from his battle with sexual sin to provide a practical guide built upon Gods Word to help others learn how to gain victory.

Facing the Shadow by Patrick Carnes, PhD

This workbook takes techniques used by thousands of people recovering from sex addiction and shows, in a step-by-step manner, how to break free of this disease and live a healthier, more fulfilling life. Each of this hope-filled works chapters sets the stage for the recovery tasks at hand before providing practical, easy-to-follow exercises specifically designed to help readers understand and address them. Topics covered include why denial is so powerful and what can be done to counter it, how to face the consequences of behavior using recovery principles, how to respond to change and crisis, how to manage life without dysfunctional behavior, and how spirituality and recovery are interwoven.

This is not a Christian model of recovery but can be very effective if used side by side with scriptural principles.

The Way of Purity: Enjoying Lasting Freedom in Christ by Mike Cleveland

This workbook is a printed form of the online course from Setting Captives Free (which is no longer available). It provides a solid biblical framework to guide someone struggling with sexual sin to freedom in Christ.

At the Altar of Sexual Idolatry by Steve Gallagher

This book takes a closer look at the attitude of the heart in relation to sexual sin and provides a good resource rooted in Scripture pointing those suffering to the hope of Christ.

To Kill a Lion by Bruce Lengeman

Written by a professional counselor to counselors and strugglers alike, this book provides insight into the root causes of this sin in a persons life and provides solid biblical insights to help them achieve freedom.

The Pornography Trap: Setting Pastors and Laypersons Free from Sexual Addiction by Ralph H. Earle Jr. and Mark R. Laaser

This book is written to address the issue of sexual sin among pastors and laypersons serving in the church. The authors provide insight related to when leaders struggle and provide a guide to developing a biblical view of healthy sexuality.

Healing the Wounds of Sexual Addiction by Dr. Mark R. Laaser

This book by Dr. Mark Laaser traces the roots of the problem of sexual addiction, discusses the impact, yet provides a biblical approach to self-control and sexual integrity. This book is essential in helping one uncover the root causes of their acting out in sexual brokenness.

Seven Desires by Mark and Debbie Laaser

In this book, Mark and Debbie Laaser explore the seven desires given by Godto be heard, affirmed, blessed, safe, touched, chosen, and included. Using testimonies, a strong biblical foundation, as well as psychological principles, the Laasers provide an explanation of each desire, how to seek after it in a healthy way, and what each one looks like when it is truly fulfilled.

Shattered Vows: Hope and Healing for Women Who Have Been Sexually Betrayed by Debra Laaser

This book is written to the wives whose husbands have succumbed to sexual sin through pornography and sexual acting out. Drawing from her personal story of betrayal as well as her experience of helping thousands of other women, Debra Laaser provides practical tools to empower those who have been devastated by their husbands sin.

Storm Tossed: How a U.S. Serviceman Won the Battle of Sex Addiction by Jake Porter

Written under the pseudonym Jake Porter, this book is the testimony of a naval sailor who was sexually addicted from reading pornographic magazines, which led to acting out with prostitutes during his time in the military. The author found freedom through the power of Christ.

MINISTRIES:

Day Seven Ministries

Offers individual counseling and group support for men and women in sexual conflict over sexual abuse, sexual addiction, or homosexuality. Locations: Lancaster, Camp Hill, and Reading Pennsylvania.

Celebrate Recovery

According to the Celebrate Recovery website, Celebrate Recovery is a biblical and balanced program that helps us overcome our hurts, hang-ups, and habits. It is based on the actual words of Jesus rather than psychological theory. Twenty years ago, Saddleback Church launched Celebrate Recovery with 43 people. It was designed as a program to help those struggling with hurts, habits, and hang-ups by showing them the loving power of Jesus Christ through a recovery process. Celebrate Recovery has helped more than 17,000 people at Saddleback, attracting over 70 percent of its members from outside the church. Eighty-five percent of the people who go through the program stay with the church and nearly half serve as church volunteers. Celebrate Recovery is now in over 20,000 churches worldwide! Go to www.celebraterecovery.com to find a group near you.

WEBSITES:

Fight the New Drug, www.fightthenewdrug.org.

This site raises awareness on the effects of pornography and provides links to the Fortify program, which is an online recovery program developed by them. This is not a Christian organization but does provide useful information on the damaging effects of pornography use on the brain, relationships, and the connection of pornography with the dark world of human sex trafficking.

A s you and your spouse walk through this process, create a document on which you will record your co-mission statement, scriptures, goals, and any other information. We recommend that you print this document and keep it in your Bibles for a quick reference to review and to pray over.

During this time, dont forget to enjoy your time away, go out for a nice meal, or see a movie together!

A. Prayer

Praying together as a couple is a key to this time:

Start by giving thanks for Gods provision from this past year.