Heidi Barr - 12 Tiny Things: Simple Ways to Live a More Intentional Life

For the powerful female healers in my life: Tina Green, Michele Rae, Susan Vaughn-Fier, and Tricia Spitzmuellerwho have accompanied me toward wholeness one tiny step at a time. ER

For my brothers: Jacob, Andrew, and Alexander Helling. HB

Maybe you are searching in the branches for what only exists in the roots.

Rumi

Six weeks into the coronavirus pandemic, my family of six was sheltering in place in New York City. Schooling kids at home, trying to stay healthy, and maintaining a high workload, all underlaid by the uncertainty of what was coming next, was an overwhelming combination some days. One evening after the kids were in bed, I set down what I was working on, walked outside, and just looked up at the sky for five minutes. Nothing about my situation changed, but that tiny act of self-care in the form of pause shifted my perspective enough to carry on.

Life has one inevitable truth, right? Environmental chaos is a constant. In todays world, we are constantly bombarded with stimuli and choice, which can lead to decision fatigue and even paralysis. This type of cognitive overload can make even small tasks feel insurmountable (have you ever been so overwhelmed by life that the thought of folding that jeering pile of laundry seemed... impossible?). Fortunately, although we cannot prevent the chaos of the world, we can adapt ourselves to better cope with ever-changing circumstances, and through doing so bring about increased groundedness and fulfillment.

But attempting to revamp too much too quickly can be ineffective in the long run, even if it brings temporary relief. It is fighting fire with fire, chaos with chaos. Instead, we must ask ourselves: What am I feeling? What are my needs? Are my existing habits allowing me to meet those needs? Boiling down our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors to their most elemental formto their rootsallows us to understand them, which is the first step to setting an intention for change. Simplifying that which feels so complex quiets the noise and puts you back in control.

As a clinical psychologist who is dedicated to helping people everywhere become healthier versions of themselves through behavior change, I wholeheartedly believe in the power of self-inquiry and exploration into ones personal motivations and core values. Breaking down deep-rooted, complicated behavioral inefficiencies into simpler, recognizable patterns is a technique I use every day in my practice. Through mindful reflection, we can begin to understand our fundamental needs and ultimate motivations (the why behind it all), and suddenly a path to changing and improving our daily habits becomes illuminated.

When Heidi Barr and Ellie Roscher approached me about penning this foreword, I was both personally humbled and professionally thrilled to see how brilliantly these behavioral constructs about which I am so passionate have been interwoven with fresh, exciting perspectives. I have had the pleasure of working alongside Heidi within the virtual walls of the behavior change company, Noom, for several years and am so pleased to see her areas of expertise collide in partnership with Ellies in such a beautiful piece.

I have often found myself wondering how some people manage to harness and focus their energy in multiple directions with such grace, and now that Ive read this book, I understandHeidi and Ellie do so one tiny thing at a time.

I am delighted to introduce to you 12 Tiny Things: Simple Ways to Live a More Intentional Life. It is a valuable resource for anyone and everyone, yet can be as uniquely yours as your lifes journey. I hope it brings as much joy, understanding, and possibility to you as it has to me.

Dr. Andreas Michaelides,
Chief of Psychology at Noom, Inc.

April 2020

New York, New York