Susan Campbell PhD - From Triggered to Tranquil: How Self-Compassion and Mindful Presence Can Transform Relationship Conflicts and Heal Childhood Wounds

Praise for From Triggered to Tranquil

Drawing on a lifetimes experience as a couple therapist and relationship coach, Susan Campbell shows how to recognize when we are triggered and explore what lies behind it. She presents straightforward, practical ways to return to a calmer state of mind and does so with kindness, compassion, clarity, and wisdom. Anyone who gets triggered from time to time and thats just about all of us should read this book. And keep it handy for when we find ourselves caught in some emotional reaction.

Peter Russell, author of Letting Go of Nothing and From Science to God

Well written and crystal-clear, this book offers simple tools for noticing when weve been hijacked by our lizard brain and replacing our automatic reactions with responses that help us feel more connected to ourselves, each other, and our world.

John Amodeo, PhD, author of Dancing with Fire

Dr. Campbell once again masterfully guides us all toward being more self-aware, compassionate, and skillful in communicating with others and creating authentic, healthy relationships. In From Triggered to Tranquil, she shows you how to quickly catch emotional reactivity, compassionately calm yourself, and speak with effective honesty without blame. I will recommend this book to all my clients.

Dr. Aziz Gazipura, bestselling author of Not Nice

A great and practical set of skillful tools for wise and compassionate living.

Jack Kornfield, author of A Path with Heart

Susan Campbell has done it. Most self-help books leave the reader on the outside, looking in. You understand what the author is saying, but their words dont actually ignite transformation. This book does the opposite. It invites you right into the heart of your own unique experience. You feel deeply seen and genuinely understood. And you are offered tools and techniques that are immediately useful in your relational life. You dont just make sense of your patterns; you actually begin to transform them. For anyone who wants to find peace with their triggers, this accessible and comforting book is a must-read. I loved it.

Jeff Brown, author of Soulshaping and Grounded Spirituality

It sometimes seems difficult to understand why we react the way we do why we get upset at things that seem small or we shut down when someone uses the wrong word. Susan Campbell beautifully answers the question Why do we get triggered, and what can we do about it? with clear and simple strategies for getting back on track. Ive been a connection teacher for over a decade, and this book taught me new language, tools, and techniques. I am already applying them in my practice and my life!

Sara Ness, founder and CEO of Authentic Revolution

In From Triggered to Tranquil, Susan Campbell shows how self-knowledge leads to self-actualization. Once you understand who you are and how you became that way, you can reframe difficult situations, change the narrative, and rewrite the script of your life.

Jack Canfield, coauthor of the Chicken Soup for the Soul series and The Success Principles

Also by Susan Campbell, PhD

Beyond the Power Struggle

The Couples Journey

Earth Community

Expanding Your Teaching Potential

The Everything Great Sex Book (coauthored by Suzie Heumann)

Five-Minute Relationship Repair (coauthored by John Grey, PhD)

From Chaos to Confidence

Getting Real

Saying Whats Real

Truth in Dating

Copyright 2021 by Susan Campbell

All rights reserved. This book may not be reproduced in whole or in part, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means electronic, mechanical, or other without written permission from the publisher, except by a reviewer, who may quote brief passages in a review.

The material in this book is intended for education. No expressed or implied guarantee of the effects of the use of the recommendations can be given or liability taken.

Text design by Tona Pearce Myers

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

Names: Campbell, Susan M., date, author.

Title: From triggered to tranquil : how self-compassion and mindful presence can transform relationship conflicts and heal childhood wounds / Susan Campbell, PhD.

Description: Novato, California : New World Library, [2021] | Summary: A self-help guide for anyone who has ever become upset, defensive, numb, or disoriented by another persons behavior. The author helps readers understand their emotional triggers, reframe the situation, and find constructive ways of coping. Includes exercises and practices-- Provided by publisher.

Identifiers: LCCN 2021022081 (print) | LCCN 2021022082 (ebook) | ISBN 9781608687404 (paperback) | ISBN 9781608687411 (epub)

Subjects: LCSH: Adjustment (Psychology) | Emotions. | Interpersonal conflict. | Self-acceptance.

Classification: LCC BF335 .C355 2021 (print) | LCC BF335 (ebook) | DDC 155.2/4--dc23

LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2021022081

LC ebook record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2021022082

First printing, August 2021

ISBN 978-1-60868-740-4

Ebook ISBN 978-1-60868-741-1

Printed in Canada on 100% postconsumer-waste recycled paper

10987654321

Contents

PART ONE
PRACTICES FOR TRANSFORMING REACTIVITY

PART TWO
APPLYING THE PRACTICES IN RELATIONSHIPS

Our unprocessed emotional wounds and the reactions that arise from them are what make us go to war, blow up at our children, get hostile on the freeways, hit send on that email rant, walk out of meetings, argue with our loved ones, and make short-sighted decisions.

T his book is a self-help guide for anyone who has ever gotten emotionally reactive, defensive, shut down, or overwhelmed in an adult relationship or group. That includes almost everyone. The hurts and disappointments that we suffer in childhood often leave lasting scars with respect to our inner sense of safety and security. These insecurities will show up later in our adult relationships in the form of trigger reactions. But this is not necessarily a bad thing. In this book, you will learn how to work with such reactions in a way that brings healing to your childhood wounds, deeper connections with others, and an expanded sense of what it means to be human.