Rabbi Shai Specht - Changing Curses For Blessings - Loving Yourself and The World Around You

Table of Contents

Changing Curses for Blessings

Loving yourself and the world around you

Rabbi Shai Specht

Be a light to others and you wont stumble on your own path.

All contents copyright 2011 by Rabbi Shai Specht . ISBN 9781610615822 A Love & Light Publication. All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form, electronic or otherwise, by any means without the prior written permission of the author.

In loving memory of my Rebbe, Rabbi Joseph H. Gelberman whose great teachings and light shine on.

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Foreword

I guess Im expected to say something complimentary of Reb Shai, but the first thing that comes to mind is that he knows how to make a mountain out of a molehill.

I had just signed up for Twitter and one of my first followers had an awesome tweet on her site. A small thought, 140 characters, a molehill, but the thought planted itself in my mind and became a mountain. It grew on me as I prayed, became larger as I studied, and expanded in my soul as I realized how practical it was in guiding people seeking spiritual guidance. I went back to the tweet and became a follower of Reb Shai. The molehill became a mountain. The quick tweet developed into an important part of my spiritual life. The succinct thought nurtured my heart.

I emailed this stranger, Reb Shai, and requested a short essay on a prayer. I was less interested in the essay than in learning more about this teacher. Reb Shai immediately and generously responded. It happened again; I realized that the tiny avatar was a giant in spirit. I had to meet him, and once again, a short shared coffee became a life changing meeting.

We live in a world in which people make a huge deal out of the smallest things, especially when it comes to negative experiences and words. Reb Shai is so in love with God, Judaism and Torah that he catches the tiny positive experiences and turns them into important practical lessons. The best part of Reb Shais teachings is that his approach teaches us how those tiny moments of clarity are indications of the giant soul within us. He expands us. He nurtures us. He heals us.

I urge you to read the short pages that follow and allow them to work their magic. You will begin to experience your inner greatness. The tweets will become important lessons. The molehills will grow into mountains.

Rabbi Simcha L. Weinberg

The Foundation Stone

New York, New York

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Introduction

This little book is jam packed with pearls of wisdom. Drawing on ideas and reflections from rabbinic to biblical to psychological to plain old common sense sources, it offers advice on feeling better, relieving stress, being hopeful, becoming less anxious and improving self-esteem.

Through these pearls of wisdom and several exercises [rabbi does mean teacher] this is a book that will teach you how and why to change your down thoughts and feelings to more positive ones - or as the title suggests: change curses for blessings.

There are stories, personal reflections and commentary that offer guiding examples of what the author is saying.

You need not be Jewish, or even religious, to enjoy and learn from this book.

And you may just decide after reading it that youd rather be a coffee bean and not a carrot or an egg!

Lynn Dorman, Ph.D.

Portland, Oregon

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A Note from the Author

Dear Reader;

We could all use more LOVE in our lives, and the more we give the more we get. This book is a life manual that will take you on a journey of self-exploration and awareness through stories, exercises and words of wisdom.

Samuel ibn Magrela was a Spanish-Jewish poet of the eleventh century who was vizier to the king of Granada. He was cursed one day in the presence of the king, who commanded Samuel to punish the offender by cutting out his tongue. The Jewish vizier, however, treated his enemy kindly, whereupon the curses became blessings.

When the king next noticed the offender, he was astonished that Samuel had not carried out his command. Samuel replied, I have torn out his angry tongue, and given him instead a kind one. The Rabbis rightly declare, Who is mighty? S/He who makes his enemy a friend. (Avot d'Rabbi Nathan 23)

We can take this statement even further and say "Who is mighty? S/He who makes her/himself a friend." Lack of love for ourselves inhibits our compassion toward others. When we make friends with ourselves, there are no obstacles to opening our hearts and minds to others. Of course we have to walk a fine line between loving/valuing ourselves and being too self-involved/absorbed.

Loving oneself certainly doesn't mean indulging oneself. Loving is an attitude towards yourself that most people don't have, because most people know things about themselves which are not desirable. Everybody has innumerable attitudes, reactions, likes and dislikes which they'd be better off without.

Self Judgment is made and while one likes one's positive attitudes, one dislikes the others. With that comes suppression of those aspects of yourself that you're not pleased with. You don't want to know about them and don't acknowledge them. That's one way of dealing with your-self, which can be detrimental to growth.

Another unskillful way is to dislike that part of yourself which appears negative and every time it arises you blame yourself, which makes matters twice as bad as they were before. With that comes fear and very often aggression.

If you wants to deal with yourself in a balanced way, it's not useful to pretend that the unpleasant part doesn't exist, I am talking about those aggressive, irritable, conceited tendencies.

The charge of "I'm so wonderful" or "I'm so terrible" is defused. We are neither wonderful nor terrible. Everyone is a human being with all the potential and all the obstructions. If you can love that human being, the one that is "me" with all its faculties and tendencies, then you can love others realistically, usefully and helpfully.

If we look at ourselves in that manner, we will learn to love ourselves in a wholesome way. Just as a mother, who at the risk of herlife loves and protects her child... Become your own mother! If we want to have a relationship with ourselves that is realistic and conducive to growth, then we need to become our own mother. A sensible mother can distinguish between that which is useful for her child and that which is detrimental, but she doesn't stop loving the child when s/he misbehaves.

This may be the most important aspect to look at in ourselves. Everyone, at one time or another, misbehaves in thought, speech or action. So what do we do with that? What does a mother do? She tells the child not to do it again, loves the child as much as she's always loved her/him and just gets on with the job of bringing up her child. Maybe we can start to bring up ourselves.

When you Love yourself enough, you will move through your Heart to the negative pole, and begin the work of bringing all your negative thoughts, feelings, words, and actions to consciousness.

The energy of your Self-Love will begin the movement of these negative patterns through your heart, and toward the positive pole of your soul. It takes stamina, courage, strength, relentless attention, and great Self-Love, to move from inertia into momentum toward the positive pole.

Find a way to be thankful for your troubles, and they can become your blessings.

Thank you for taking the time to read this book, I hope it brings you much Joy!

Love, Light and Blessings,

Rabbi Shai Specht

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