Tana Pesso - First Invite Love In: 40 Time-Tested Tools for Creating a More Compassionate Life

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Table of Contents

Advance Praise for First Invite Love In

First Invite Love In is a clear, practical handbook that will genuinely help anyone who reads it and follows its exercises. It is an especially important guide at a time when so many lack confidence about how to go beyond fear and uncertainty.

Sharon Salzberg, co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society and author of Faith and Lovingkindness

The short exercises presented here will benefit anyone who practices them.

Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche, holder of the Shambhala Buddhist Lineage and author of Turning the Mind into an Ally

A marvelous, practical book, unlike anything else out therethe ultimate how-to manual for nurturing kindness and compassion. The authors enthusiasm for compassion is contagious! Its obvious that caring for others is a good idea, and fortunately Tana Pesso and Penor Rinpoche take the reader by the hand and show us how.

Deborah Schoeberlein, author of Mindful Teaching and Teaching Mindfulness

THE DALAI LAMA

Generally speaking, having a positive mind ultimately brings us benefit and happiness. According to my own limited experience, we can change. We can transform ourselves. Therefore, if we all spend a few minutes every day trying to develop a positive, compassionate mind, as explained here, eventually compassion will truly become part of our lives. It is my prayer that by doing so we shall all contribute to a genuinely more peaceful and amicable world and to the lasting happiness of all sentient beings.

For my mother, Diane Boyden-Pesso, who taught me to have compassion for even the tiniest life forms on the planet and that differences among people were to be sought out and celebrated, not feared.

INTRODUCTION

How wonderful that you were moved to open this book and have come to this page. Even this one small step is an undeniably good thing, both for you and for the world because you have just acted on an interest in creating a more compassionate life.

Every single action, word, or thought that is motivated by the aspiration to be more kind, to cause less harm, and to create less suffering, sets ripples of goodness in motion that can transform your mind into a sea of tranquility and happiness. Whats more, this energy, if reinforced and built upon, can lead to untold positive effects for countless others near and far in both time and place. Again, how wonderful!

Moment by moment, thought by thought, step by step we can transform our minds through time-tested compassion practices, and ultimately create a garden of delight out of any life history or current circumstance, regardless of how traumatic or difficult. There are countless examples of people from all spiritual paths, faiths, and religions who have experienced terrible hardships, or even themselves created hardships and suffering for others, who have turned their minds toward love and compassion and found peace and happiness.

My own unshakable confidence in the compassion practices I present in this book is the result of having studied with many great spiritual masters, each of whom possessed a level of kindness and peace of mind that surpassed anything Id ever personally encountered before. The fact that so many of them had undergone phenomenally painful life experiences made their attainment of contentment, joy, and kindness even more remarkableand it made their teaching even more compelling.

One might be tempted to imagine that there is something unusual in the makeup of people who can so effectively transform hardship into wisdom and compassion. Moreover, we might imagine whatever that special something is, we ourselves are surely lacking it! Fortunately for us, for you and for me, too, this is not at all the case. Not in the least. In fact, the opposite is true. It is in our very nature to be kindthe very nature of all of us, even you, even me; it is part of the very core of our being. No one is born without this essential core of compassion and kindness, and no clumsiness, hardship, or even intentional ill-will can destroy it. Our challenge is to simply rediscover this deep compassion and nurture it, to clear away the fog obscuring this primordial reserve of good.

And thats exactly what this book will help you to do.

And I am certain: You can succeed!

Even if you have accumulated years and years of conditioning that leads you to act contrary to this kindness, even if you have tried fruitlessly in the past to change only to see yourself fail more vividly even amid and despite your good intentions, even if you have never had so much as a glimpse of being unconditionally accepted and lovedeven then you can succeed.

Today is the beginning of a new story for you. A story guaranteed to have a happy ending if only youll give sufficient time and bring just a little patience, practice, and perseverance. After all, it takes time and practice to change the mind patterns of a lifetime. Yet the truth is that it is entirely within your power and abilityregardless of your past history or your present circumstanceto regain your birthright of a happy, peaceful, and compassionate mind. This book, the one you now hold in your hand, contains a time-tested and proven path that will lead to the happy experience of life that is your hearts desire.

So let us begin this joyful journey!

SOME ADVICE IN USING THIS BOOK

First and foremost, please be kind and patient with yourself, even merciful, as you work toward developing a more peaceful and compassionate mind. Self-criticism and doubt will likely arise as you work with the practices, but please trust that some good will come of your engagement with themeven if you cant see it right away. And if you cant manage to feel that trust, then just be open to the possibilityeven if you believe it is remotethat some good might come from your efforts.

I suggest you give yourself enough time (and enough practice through repetition) to become completely comfortable and proficient with the ideas and visualizations in each practice before moving on to the next one. But its also important that you follow your own instincts about how to pace your work with the practices. As long as you come back at some point to take the next step forward in expanding your heart and mind for greater peace and compassion, that is all that matters.

Youll no doubt find that some practices come easily to you whereas others might feel like unfamiliar or even uncomfortable ground. Exercises of this latter type will require revisiting a few times before they really take hold in your mind. Until they do, please be patient with yourself and treat yourself kindly.

Visualizations figure prominently in the guided meditationsyet a natural facility to visualize is in no way necessary. Merely thinking about each thing that is described is sufficient to help open your heart and mind to greater peace and happiness. You might see it in vivid and detailed Technicolor, or you might have just a vague visual impression in your mind, or you might even see nothing at all. It truly doesnt matter in the least. It is entirely enough to just contemplate the meaning of the scene as it is described in the guided meditation.

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