Debra Beck - My Feet Arent Ugly: A Girls Guide to Loving Herself from the Inside Out

My feet arent ugly

A girls guide to loving herself from the inside out

by debra beck
Illustrations by Maggie Anthony

Copyright 2007, 2011 by Debra Beck
Illustrations 2007, 2011 by Maggie Anthony

REVISED SECOND EDITION

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any
electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems,
without permission in writing from the publisher, except by a reviewer who may quote
brief passages in a review.

The Library of Congress has cataloged the first edition as follows:
Beck, Debra.
My feet arent ugly: A girls guide to loving herself from
the inside out/Debra Beck ; illustrations by Maggie anthony.1st ed. p. cm.

ISBN-13: 978-0-8253-0542-9 (pbk.: alk. paper)
ISBN-10: 0-8253-0542-X (pbk.: alk. paper)

1. Self-esteem in adolescence. 2. Self-acceptance in adolescence.
3. Teenage girlsPsychology. I. Title.
BF724.3.S36B43 2007
158.10835dc22
2006034638

Revised Second Edition ISBN: 978-0-8253-0602-0

Book design by Jane Perini
Published in the united States by Beaufort Books, New York
www.beaufortbooks.com
Distributed by Midpoint Trade Books, New York
www.midpointtradebooks.com

8 6 4 2 1 0 9 7 5 3 1
Printed in the united States of America

For Amber and Lindsay

Contents

ONE
Lets Learn to Like Ourselves

TWO
What Are You Afraid of?

THREE
Big Bad Bullies

FOUR
Are you Creative? Yes, Everyone Is!

FIVE
Being HealthyBoth Physically and Spiritually

SIX
Be Cyber-Smart

SEVEN
Who Is Doing Drugs?

EIGHT
Kids on the EdgeTeen Suicide

NINE
Becoming a WomanBut Im Still a Kid!

TEN
Sex! Is There a Price to Pay?

ELEVEN
Have You Started Healing Yet?

Acknowledgments

This book would not have come to fruition if it werent for the years I spent as a young mother growing up with my own two wonderfully spirited daughters, Amber and Lindsay. I thank them for being who they are and supporting me through this process in my life.

I am also grateful for all of the kids that inhabited my home during their teenage years, Nyla, Julie, Kim, Eric, shelly, and sharon to name a few. They gave me insight into my purpose in life.

I also thank all of my friends who have believed in me and supported me, especially Maura, who makes walking my path so much more pleasurable. I have so much gratitude for Maggie Anthony, my illustrator, for bringing life to my book and adding such a warm energy to the characters.

A special thanks goes out to Beaufort Books for making this book a reality and to Eric Kampmann for many laughs along the way. Many thanks to my book designer, Jane Perini, for the amazing cover and interior design that brings fun and love into my book in a way that I knew was possible. Finally, I am so deeply thankful for all the many mentors throughout my journey who have shared their wisdom and guidance so that I could be there for myself and these young girls in a whole different way.

My feet arent ugly

I hope My Feet Arent Ugly will give you the seeds you need to start planting a happy and empowered life for yourself.

-Debra

Introduction

As the alarm screamed, I threw my feet onto the floor and stretched with excitement because today was the first day of Spirit Week for Homecoming. The energy at school would be high, building up to the big night of Homecoming. I started to brush my teeth, my blurry eyes focused on my face in the mirror. Was that what I thought it was? Yep! It was. It was a pimple that seemed to be the size of a small grapefruit. I couldnt believe it. What was I going to do? All of the excitement from just moments before got rolled up into a ball, and it felt as if someone punched it into my stomach.

When I was a teenager, I was not so self-assured. I looked at my friends and the other girls, who all seemed to be so happy and confident, and I wondered what was wrong with me. I felt insecure and dumb. I thought I was an ugly, awkward, not-so-talented teenager. All the other girls in my class acted like they had it together: their hair was always perfect, their skin was clear, they looked like they came right out of the Abercrombie & Fitch catalog. I knew that getting ready for school could not be as challenging for them as it was for me.

Almost every morning when I looked at the clothes in my closet, I began to sweat. What was I going to wear? I began putting clothes on and pulling them off like I was a runway model. Ill wear my blue skirt with buttons down the front, with a white blouse. Oh my God, no, no, no! I looked like I worked at McDonalds. Okay, my green dress that everyone seemed to love. Suddenly, that didnt look right either. In fact, the floor was littered with clothes that didnt look right. What was I going to do? To make matters worse, not only was I sweating terribly, my hair was now poking up in some areas and sticking to my head in others. On mornings like this, I could feel a big knot in my stomach and tears welling up. When I finally settled on something to wear, like a pair of khaki shorts and a plain T-shirt, Id look in the mirror, do a couple of turns, and think, You must be kidding! This is your choice! This looks like something your mother picked out. (No offense, Mom.)

My insecurities didnt disappear. I took them with me through the better part of my young adulthood. I didnt figure out how to love myself until I was in my thirties. I decided to write this book not only for my own two young, spirited daughters, but to help other young girls learn how to love themselves and come into womanhood with a better sense of self. I dont want any teenage girl to go through what I went through before I learned to love myself.