Aundi Kolber - The Try Softer Guided Journey: A Soulful Companion to Healing

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The Try Softer Guided Journey: A Soulful Companion to Healing

Copyright 2021 by Andrea M. Kolber. All rights reserved.

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ISBN 978-1-4964-5467-6

Build: 2021-09-22 13:42:13 EPUB 3.0

THE OTHER MORNING I AWOKE BEFORE THE SUN. An anxious thought was twirling in my mind and wouldnt quit reverberating. It wasnt about anything I could actually change, mind you. Just one of those pesky in-between-sleep-and-consciousness ideas. Though it was a Saturday and I had no need to wake for some time, I almost decided to get out of bed just to make it stop. Then as I sat up in a morning haze, a calm inner voice said, Its okay, Aundi. You dont need to figure it out right now. You can rest.

Wordlessly, I laid my head back on the pillow and felt my body exhale as sleep found me once again.

Truth be told, Im not sure whether the voice I heard was from the Spirit or my own compassionate inner self. These days, they work together quite frequently. Regardless, it was exactly what I needed in those early morning hours. Later that day I shared the experience with my husband, Brendan, and tears unexpectedly filled my eyes. For me, seeing the continuation of all the ways we can heal and move toward wholeness felt like a tiny Ebenezer of Gods faithfulness. I dont think there will ever be a time when I wont feel deep gratitude for learning to show up differently in the world.

Learning to try softerthat is, to cultivate compassionate attention for our whole selveshas been a crucial element of that healing. Even as I write today, our country is neck-deep in a global pandemic, issues of racial injustice, and political unrestand for the first time ever, my husband and I are considering homeschooling. We are grateful and privileged to have the opportunity to consider how we educate our kiddos. Yet its all still a bit overwhelming. In the midst of so much individual and collective turmoil, Im finding that I need the message of try softer more than ever. I need to remember its okay to honor and attend to the information my body gives me. I need to recall that my value is not, and has never been, based on what I produce. Its essential I remember that embodying a gentle posture with myself allows me to more deeply and attentively love others in my life too.

The reality is, I wont ever graduate from trying softer. This is the work of my lifeof being alive. And this, too, is grace. It is a gift to know we are constantly invited into a compassionate posture, not so we can stay stuck, but so we can live into who God created us to be. And while it may seem like a paradox, I believe now is exactly the time when we need to cultivate tenderness and compassion for the pain that exists in the worldnot only for others but also for ourselves.

I want this for you, too, dear one. If youre reading these words, youre likely on the same path as I am: a nonlinear journey of hard-earned steps toward wholeness, compassion, and inner healing. Whether youve read Try Softer and feel ready to dig deeper into its principles or youve been doing this work for a while and are looking for more guided support, I welcome you. I hope you see these pages as a gentle and accessible invitation to further learning. I pray this work feels like an exhale to your soul, and that you, too, can learn to be with yourself differently. And most of all, I hope that when tender wounds from your life surface, youll steward grace toward them in the same way our good God already does.

If youll allow me to be blunt, Im not typically a big fan of workbooks. I know, I know... here I am writing one. But heres why Ive tended to stay away from them in the past: They dont always lend themselves to the flexibility thats needed to attune to each of our stories, bodies, and spirits. The questions or exercises presented can sometimes feel like rigid tasks we have to complete even if they feel overwhelming, like measures or standards we have to meet by the end of the book in order to truly heal. And as you may know from reading Try Softer, white-knuckling like thisforcing ourselves to engage when our bodies and spirits dont feel safe to do sooften only ends in staying stuck, or at worst, experiencing further trauma and pain.

With this in mind, you will notice that I do all that I can to give you as much choice as possible as you engage with this material. This is not by accident. As we talk about in Try Softer, choice is crucial to learning to pay compassionate attention to oneself; as you move through this content, I want you to feel free to make it work for you.

In each session, youll find several invitations to help you more deeply process the contentinvitations that are designed to engage and explore your inner world, your creativity, and your hopes for the future. As much as youre able, listen to the information and wisdom that your body is communicating, and honor that. Give yourself permission to go slow; if you feel overwhelmed, you can skip questionseven entire sections!and come back to them if or when you can.

Trying softer can be empowering, freeing, and life-giving. And yet some elements of the journey can be difficult, deep, and heavy. My prayer is that the words and practices ahead will empower you for the fullness of the sacred work before you. May this guided journey be a gentle support, a companion helping you come home to yourself as you decide the route and set the pace for your journey.

Heres a more detailed look at what you can expect along the way.

One of the most beautiful concepts Ive come to learn, both professionally and personally, is that stories change and move us. Not only that; we also carry our own stories of lived experiences in our bodies. At the beginning of each session, to help us more deeply combine and integrate concepts from Try Softer, youll find a short personal reflection to help you continue processing concepts learned in the corresponding Try Softer chapters. You can also find free, short video introductions for each of these sessions on my websiteaundikolber.com/videos.