April Griseta - X Drama Queen: Recovered from Trauma

X Drama Queen

Recovered from trauma

Dr. April Griseta

Trilogy Christian Publishers

TUSTIN, CA

Trilogy Christian Publishers

A Wholly Owned Subsidiary of Trinity Broadcasting Network

2442 Michelle Drive

Tustin, CA 92780

Copyright 2021 by Dr. April Griseta

All scripture quotations are taken from the Authorized King James Version of the Bible unless otherwise noted. Public domain.

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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.

ISBN 978-1-63769-230-1

ISBN 978-1-63769-231-8 (ebook)

Contents

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Dedication

This book is lovingly dedicated to my husband, Joseph. My best friend has patiently sat by while I spent numerous hours studying, typing, and editing manuscripts, completing sermons, and assisting my daughter with her three children. He has denied his own needs to sacrifice for others. To him, I am eternally grateful.

Message from the Author

Sometimes when reading very sensitive material, or material that reminds you of your past, negative emotions can get stirred up. You may start to feel anxious, depressed, or angry. This means that some further healing needs to come to you. Please seek out a counselor and receive help. There is no shame in seeking help. In fact, it is to be commended. It means you want to be made whole and no longer tormented by your past.

While this is not a medical book on how the brain stores traumatic memories, it will touch on how you may have suppressed traumatic memories and still get triggered today by environmental cues. Understanding what may be happening to you is empowering and helps normalize your experience. You are not alone and there are many community resources available. Psychoeducational support groups with Christ at the center are highly recommended for healing (if not contraindicated). By this I mean some highly traumatized people are not ready for a group experience and may need individual counseling first.

It is truly my hope that X Drama Queen will bring some revelatory insight and begin to facilitate healing. God wants to restore health to you and heal you of your wounds (Jeremiah 30:17). This has been my personal Scripture that has carried me through some very difficult times. Ask God for yours.

Introduction

There are many reasons drama queens exist. Some are desperately seeking attention; others enjoy the chaos of battle; and yet others just love sharing their misery. All of us may have encountered this queen who thrives on turmoil. She can be highly theatrical and perceive other peoples problems as always less severe than hers. But what has helped create the drama queen?

Somewhere a deep inner need has not been met or these behaviors may have been learned and reinforced by the attention it brings them. Turmoil may be a familiar environment or maybe traumatophilia (attraction and fascination to trauma and danger) has developed. Many of the drama queens that I have met have suffered from some sort of abuse, neglect, or abandonment during childhood. Their childhood dependency needs (love, attention) have not been met by primary caregivers and they continually search for this need to be filled.

Their cry is heard far into adulthood. It can be quite irksome and does not seem age-appropriate. The poor soul continually cries, Somebody pay attention to me. Some will even create battles just to be noticed. They feel that some negative attention is better than being ignored or rejected.

Unfortunately, many drama queens sabotage themselves, as people start to move away from them instead of giving them the attention they crave. Some have met diagnostic criteria or at least some traits that fit the Cluster B personality disorders (such as narcissistic personality disorder, borderline personality disorder, and histrionic personality disorder) and others may have met the criteria for other mental health disorders. A clinician would have to make a full assessment to give a proper diagnosis (if any) but drama queens for the most part are self-absorbed, emotionally unstable, and very theatrical in their presentation.

Past trauma may have caused fragmentation of self or boundary difficulties, nevertheless one can choose to continually live a life of drama through trauma repetition and reenactments, or one can choose to surrender to the Lordship of Christ. One may also choose to continually be triggered by past pain and have bouts of confusion or one may choose to take the necessary steps leading toward wholeness.

X Drama Queen will look at the impact of various trauma, saboteurs and the faulty ways drama queens have used to cope and or manipulate. The book, however, does not stop there but delightfully leads to the place of overcoming. As you read through the pages one can learn how to navigate crisis, make better choices, and dismantle psychological defenses that no longer work. If you are the drama queen or know of one, this book will bring insight into the world where she lives; and how she attempts to rule and reign.

Trauma and Drama

For God is not the author of confusion but of peace.

1 Corinthians 14:33, NKJV

Moths Around the Flame

Trauma can help create repetitive drama. Victims of trauma have been known to recreate scenarios that are familiar to their past. They start fires and camp around the flame. Did you know that the drama queen may simply be reenacting past trauma to finally gain mastery over fear or to feel some sort of control? Trauma repetition is an effort by victims to bring resolution to a traumatic memory. By repeating the experience, the victims try anew to figure out a way to respond to eliminate fear.

Also, if there is no drama around, they feel that something is wrong and will create a disturbance or some sort of sick excitement. She says, I can feel something now, I am no longer numb. Past trauma may have caused a shut down of feelings. Drama in my own life has at times relieved psychological pain, temporarily. I am not saying I wanted to feel pain, but I am saying I wanted to feel alive. As distorted as it may sound, chaos helped ground me to a reality I was very comfortable with.

Some drama queens are so hungry for attention, they will act out to get it. While this term is often used for unruly children it applies to the drama queen as well. According to Healthline , Acting out behavior is when one exhibits unrestrained and improper actions. The behavior is usually caused by suppressed or denied feelings or emotions. Acting out is a way to seek attention and a desire for power. Acting out allows them to feel in control over their actions.

Many people have experienced trauma in their lives. Some continually have night terrors, panic attacks, and floating anxiety. Yet others suffer little. Of course, many factors contribute to this such as duration of adverse events, age at the time of trauma, severity, characteristics of the individual, developmental processes and sociocultural factors. Victims of trauma can suffer greatly and may need tools to build resilience.