Abbie Halberstadt - M Is for Mama: A Rebellion Against Mediocre Motherhood

HARVEST HOUSE PUBLISHERS

EUGENE, OREGON

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M Is for Mama

Copyright 2022 by Abbie Halberstadt

Published by Harvest House Publishers

Eugene, Oregon 97408

www.harvesthousepublishers.com

ISBN 978-0-7369-8377-8 (hardcover)

ISBN 978-0-7369-8378-5 (eBook)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2021943911

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For Alby .

Because you always believed I could .

You are my favorite. Really, really .

Shaun and Abbie

Ezra (16)

Simon (14)

Della (11)

Evy and Nola (9)

Theo (7)

Honor (5)

Shiloh (3)

Titus and Tobias (1)

Contents

I f youve got two X chromosomes, you can be a mother. The standards are so low-key that fully 50 percent of the worlds population aces the qualification test before theyve even taken one breath outside their own mothers bellies.

But the physical ability to bear children does little to lessen the pang of panicked inadequacy almost every new mother feels upon being handed a tiny mewling infant to take home mere hours after forceful eviction from her body. We buckle their fragile, twiglike arms into a contraption made of plastic and foam and wonder if it should even be legal to grant someone with so little experience the primary task of raising another person from birth to adulthood.

I mean, think about it. People go to school for years to clean teeth. And yet its okay to be given full responsibility for an actual human being with literally zero required reading, certifications, degrees, or crash courses of any kind.

And therein lies the mystery of motherhood.

Were expected to simply get it. To go with our guts. To be a natural baby whisperer. That all-encompassing rush of intense mother love we experience when we first lock eyes with our newborn covers a multitude of sins, right?

Well, yes. And no.

Because no matter how attached (or not) we feel to our babies, the fact of the matter is that instincts do little to combat silent reflux or calm a baby who refuses to latch or take a bottle. Or how about convincing the sweet little gal who thinks its hilarious to wake up at 3:00 a.m. to pat your face and play that sleep is a better idea?

And then theres the fact that theyre only babies for approximately 17 blinks of the eye before, suddenly, theyre walking and talking and expressing opinions like Ew and No and Sto-op!

And yet again, the game has changed. And youre faced with an entirely new set of challenges and joys.

As a mama to many, with children in every age category from baby to teenager, I can assure you that the game never stops changing. At least, not in its particulars. There will always be some new wrinkle to iron outthat one child who breaks the mold entirely.

However, I firmly believe that the Bible has given us clear principles to live by that can make this whole motherhood gig a lot less intimidating and isolating. If Eve and Ruth and Rachel and Elizabeth and Mary and millions more in between were able to muddle through this mess of motherhood by Gods grace, then so can we.

But we must be willing to heed the words of Proverbs 4:6-7: Do not forsake wisdom, and she will protect you; love her, and she will watch over you. The beginning of wisdom is this: Get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding. Hosea 4:6 ( ESV ) states it even more dramatically when it says, My people are destroyed for lack of knowledge. The world may not officially require a degree for motherhood, but when we approach it with the same air of studiousness that we would any other profession at which we want to excel, we exponentially increase the likelihood of our not only surviving but thriving in a household of peace instead of chaos.

So where do we get this wisdom worth every penny weve got? Job 12:12 says, Is not wisdom found among the aged? Does not long life bring understanding? My favorite source of mama know-how is those godly women who have gone before me and crash tested so many different scenarios with their own kids. My own mother, who raised my brother and me. A precious friend and mama of twelve, almost twenty years my senior. Another wise mama of three who is a few years older than I. Sally Clarkson. Elisabeth Elliot. Ruth Bell Graham.