Judy Apps - Butterflies and Sweaty Palms: 25 sure-fire ways to speak and present with confidence

Youve either got it or you havent, thats what people say.

Either youre a good public speaker or youre not.

Speakers are born and not made.

Thats bad news if you dont feel you are a born speaker. Speaking is an essential skill. It isnt only those occasions on the podium or even the oft-dreaded wedding speech; the ability to communicate under pressure is required in countless different situations for informal presentations, meetings, interviews, key leadership moments, tackling a difficult situation with a colleague or even asking someone out on a date.

If you dont feel confident about your ability such moments can be a real challenge and create a lot of sweat, anxiety and sleepless nights. But they are hard to avoid completely.

So, should you give up now?

No, not at all.

Just read a little bit further

O God of second chances and new beginnings, here I am. Again.

Nancy Spiegelberg

Here is Edward Bear, coming downstairs now, bump, bump, bump, on the back of his head, behind Christopher Robin. It is, as far as he knows, the only way of coming downstairs, but sometimes he feels that there really is another way, if only he could stop bumping for a minute and think of it.

A. A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh

Lots of books have been written on public speaking and presenting; perhaps youve read some of them. Maybe up till now none of those books has made much difference. You might ask yourself if its really possible to speak well in public for you.

So straight away I want to tell you the answer is yes.

Yes, its possible.

Its possible for you.

You really can learn how to perform well in public. You can learn what to do to overcome performance anxiety even if you think you have tried everything and have completely run out of ideas.

What gives me the confidence that its possible for you? Well, because I have witnessed many people succeed. Over the years I have coached hundreds of people on public speaking and confidence, and many started with little hope. My Voice of Influence workshops have been attended by some who could scarcely get themselves inside the door but edged in holding on to the walls with fear. And those very same people by the end of the next day stood up and gave a speech without notes that connected powerfully with the audience.

I have worked with people one-to-one who have told me at the outset that their issue goes beyond fear: This is not just fear, its a phobia, they say. Those same people learn in a few sessions how to perform with assurance. One person had actually fainted from anxiety the last time shed had to give a presentation for her corporation. Very soon after we had worked together she went on to give a successful presentation to an audience of two hundred potential investors.

I am sure that you too would like to be able to perform with assurance and confidence. But the truth may be that you are worried and frightened . You tell yourself not to be but nothing ever changes. Maybe too you have heard promises from teachers and trainers that didnt lead to any positive results for you.

Firstly, its not just about learning what to do. You probably have a good idea what to do already. Even if you feel less than confident about your material, the finer points of running a PowerPoint presentation or the protocols of a formal speech, even if you worry about forgetting things or looking stupid or making mistakes, Im convinced you have watched enough people speak either live or on screen to know broadly what to do. You are probably also sufficiently aware of the pitfalls to know what not to do.

The problem is that even with this knowledge you cant do it. Youve already tried to do what you see good speakers do and it hasnt worked for you. The reason it hasnt worked I suspect is that you dont believe its possible for you. Its your self-belief that lets you down.

If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito.

Betty Reese

This time youll get to the root of it. This book will help you in easy steps to gain the self-belief to speak brilliantly.

Youll learn:

The one thing you need to know to stop feeling alone and hopeless.

The four common-sense strategies youre probably using right now and why they never work.

Why most of the advice youre getting from well-meaning professionals and self-help books is actually making it harder to perform well.

Why working at improving your performance is never successful and what to do about it.

How to overcome your self-defeating belief that its just not possible, and create the mindset that will allow you to get exactly what you want.

How to make sure youre in the right frame of mind every time.

How to come alive when youre speaking instead of dying on your feet.

What to say and what not to say to make sure that the audience loves you and listens to every word you say.

How to ensure that you hit the ground running whenever you speak.

The book is in two parts: Part I introduces you to some of the tools and Part II contains 25 sure-fire strategies for overcoming performance anxiety . When you get to Part II you might want to read straight through from beginning to end on a first reading, or you may prefer to browse to see which strategies jump out at you and practise those first. You can then go through Part II again and learn the strategies one by one. Some will be immediately useful and others might take a bit of practice. Sometimes those are the very ones that will become your favourites.

Each strategy in Part II is introduced and then the process is laid out step by step. At the end of each strategy there are notes or case studies based on the experiences of others who have done the exercises. These notes will guide you to explore various options to make the strategies work for you even those that seem less easy at first. This makes it more like my working with you in real life: we are all different and sometimes exercises work better if they are tweaked a little to suit you.

Keep the book by you and consult it every time you have a question you cant answer or whenever you need a bit of extra help. You can also contact me at info@voiceofinfluence.co.uk if you cant find the answer.

The journey starts here. If you are impatient you can go straight to Part II and get started on the strategies! Come back to Part I though its an important part of the process.

Your success will depend less on hard work than on your willingness to try something different. Listen to this cautionary tale: