Harold Vaughan - The Power of Forgiveness: How to Get Along with Everybody All the Time!

Copyright 2022Harold Vaughan

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P REFACE

So many have been hurt, abused, betrayed, and devastated by the actions of others. These wounds have left tremendous injuries and damaging divisions. The Bible prescribes the cure in such cases: forgiveness and reconciliation. As our culture continues to disintegrate, I can think of no greater truth that needs to be practiced than forgiveness.

In his book Mere Christianity, C. S. Lewis wrote, Forgiveness is a beautiful word until you have something to forgive. Lofty concepts like forgiveness are appealing in a theoretical sense but can be difficult when applied practically and personally.

God has not promised utopia in this life. Offenses will come. When offenses come, we must know and practice the art of forgiveness. Other times we are the offenders, and we must seek reconciliation. This book is an instruction manual on forgiveness. It also addresses how to relate to our offenders who remain unrepentant.

Through Calvary, forgiveness has become a blessed reality. Healing, liberation, and lasting freedom can be ours by practicing this skill. It is my desire that many will be set free by the truths presented in this book.

If the title seems a bit too promising, hold off judgment until you have read the book. Through grace, obedience, and wisdom, we can do our part in getting along with others, even if they refuse to get along with us!

H AROLD V AUGHAN

SECTION 1

G RANTING F ORGIVENESS

CHAPTER 1

W HY S HOULD I F ORGIVE ?

I heard of a man who was bitten by a rabid dog. The attending doctor told him that rabies was not only incurable, it was also fatal. The physician recommended that the dying man get his house in order. Both shocked and silent, the patient just sat there. At length, the doomed man requested a pen and paper. He started then to write fast and furiously. About an hour later, the doctor came by and found the man still writing feverishly. The doctor said, Im glad to see you are writing out your will. The man responded, This aint no will. Its a list of all the people Im going to bite before I die! Living with bitterness is a poor way to exist, and dying with bitterness is the worst way to exit the planet. So why should we forgive our offenders?

The way we treat our fellow men is a clear indicator of our relationship with God. The Lord Jesus takes the way we treat others personally: Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me (Matt. 25:40). Consequently, to be at odds with a fellow Christian spells double trouble: not only are we at odds with our brother, but we are also at odds with Christ in him. The converse is true as well: Inasmuch as ye did it not to one of the least of these, ye did it not to me (Matt. 25:45). The Lord documents our dealings with others. The way we relate to the least of these is of utmost importance to God. Our treatment of others indicates what we think about Christ.

So important is forgiveness that Jesus emphasized it in the model prayer: And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors (Matt. 6:12). Jesus words could not be plainer: For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you: But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses (Matt. 6:14-15). There is a correlation between our treatment of others and Gods treatment of us.

The model prayer gives us instruction on how we should speak with God. And before we can speak with the Lord, we must deal with the vital subject of forgiveness: And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors (Matt. 6:12). This first part of the model prayer addresses vertical forgiveness: Forgive us our debts (Matt. 6:12).

Keeping short accounts with God by admitting and confessing our sins is imperative:

If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth: But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin. If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:6-9).

Walking in the light means putting every dark thing under Christs blood. Fellowship with God is possible because divine mercy has paid the price for our forgiveness, that is, Christs death on the cross. While a Christian has perfect standing before God, his state is dependent on his willingness to visit the fountain filled with blood as often as sin arises. We must put our sins where God put them, beneath Christs atoning blood. Calvary covers our sins from Gods viewpoint. But we must uncover our transgressions through confession to maintain fellowship with God. Since Christ emphasized this essential category of divine forgiveness in the model prayer, it must be vitally important and foundational. Agreeing with God about our sin is the meaning of confession. And when we confess our wrongs to God, He faithfully restores our fellowship and vital reality.

On the heels of vertical forgiveness is horizontal forgiveness: as we forgive our debtors (Matt. 6:12). Forgiven people are forgiving people! As we receive Gods forgiveness for our offenses, we are enabled to forgive our offenders. One mark of saving grace is the imparted capacity to extend forgiveness to others. As grace comes into us, grace flows out from us. When mercy is experienced, mercy is extended. The cross points in two directions: vertically and horizontally. Meaningful prayer is contingent upon forgiveness.

Next to loving God with all our heart, mind, and strength, our foremost priority is relating properly to our fellow man. Jesus spelled it out clearly: Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way;first be reconciledto thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift (Matt. 5:23-24, emphasis added). Reconciliation is Gods priority for you and me. It precedes giving, service, and sacrifice. It is so important that Jesus said we should