Theresa Caputo - Good Grief: Heal Your Soul, Honor Your Loved Ones, and Learn to Live Again

Also by Theresa Caputo

Theres More to Life Than This

You Cant Make This Stuff Up

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Copyright 2017 by An Evening with Theresa, Inc.

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First Atria Books hardcover edition March 2017

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Interior design by Amy Trombat

Jacket design by Zoe Norvell

Jacket photograph by Sherwood-Triart Photography

Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data is available.

ISBN 978-1-5011-3908-6

ISBN 978-1-5011-3910-9 (ebook)

For my family, friends, and everyone on Team Caputo whose support, love, and generosity fill me with so much gratitude, I could burst! Thank you for respecting my gift and helping me spread Spirits messages.

For God and Spirit, who never allow for a dull moment and always have our healing in mind.

If youve picked up this book, its pretty safe to assume that a loved one has passed or that youd like to support a friend or family member going through the grief process. So I want to first say that Im so sorry for your loss, and feel so grateful that you trust me to hold your hand during this challenging journey. And while I realize youre suffering, I also need you to know there is hope and healing in your future. It is not a coincidence that you have my book in your hands. Something made you stop and believe that this time, in this book, youll read what it takes to finally fill the aching hole in your heart. Listen, that something you felt wasnt a coincidence or gas from the chicken curry you ate for lunch. It was your loved ones soul, their ever-present energy, speaking through yours. Its their greatest hope that you learn to heal and carry on.

Where did I get this intel? Well, as you may know from watching my reality show Long Island Medium , reading my books, or catching a shockingly accurate spoof about me on Saturday Night Live or Jimmy Kimmel Live! , Im a medium. This means I sense and feel Spirit thats around us every daya.k.a. the souls that love, protect, and guide us from Heaven, including God, angels, spirit guides, souls of faith like saints, and departed loved ones. Ive been on a one-on-one basis with Spirit since the age of four, though I didnt hone my abilities until I was in my late twenties (as an uber-Catholic, lets just say it took a while for me to accept my abilities). Once I felt confident that talking to souls who walk in Gods light is, in fact, a gift from Him, I devoted myself to helping people work through their sorrow by channeling their loved ones healing guidance. Whats amazing is that Ive found it always gives them the reassurance, comfort, and kick in the pants they need to truly mend their souls. Heaven knows none of this comes from my brainIm as surprised as anyone when I say what I do! I am simply a vessel for messages that come from a Creator who knows a lot more about how the universe works than you or I possibly could.

What I have always known is that someday Id put the best of Spirits healing advice and client stories into one book, and Spirit recently showed me that the time is now. Across cultures, weve become increasingly open about our feelings and instincts, not to mention curious about the Other Side. Whether Im at the store or manicurist, or just minding my own beeswax at the deli, theres a good chance Ill meet strangers whose loved ones passed, and theyll pour their hearts out to me. Sometimes the person does it hoping Spirit will come through, but this happens to friends who dont talk to dead people too. The truth is, when you lose a person you love, the feeling is so raw that it consumes you. Immediately, you find a way to edge it into any conversation, as if you couldnt possibly talk another minute without telling your storynever mind if its relevant or if the listener wants to hear any more about it. Am I right?

While Im sure theres a psychological term for this behavior, Spirit says its all good. Sharing your pain shouldnt feel awkward or forcedin fact, it should feel as natural as sharing joy. Sharing, in general, has a spiritual purpose because we learn from and lean on each other as a community. We form connections that on some level remind us that we also share a universal consciousnessin other words, that were all in this together. Its important that we learn the tools that can help us to help each other out.

At the end of the day, Spirit says that when youre faced with a loss, you have a choice about how you grieve. You may feel defenseless at first, but you are responsible for how you manage grief because you have been given innate tools to navigate it. God has instilled in us both instinct and free will, and just as we use them to meet our soul mates or pursue our passions, we must also use these tools to champion heartache and honor loving memories. Try not, then, to feel powerless to grief because choice can give you the control you crave. For example, you can choose to keep your feelings to yourself or express them, to visit a cemetery alone or celebrate your loved one with a party. You can decide how to carry on their legacy and what youll believe about the afterlife. You can opt to welcome their signs and symbols and invite their souls to guide you every day. Plain and simple, you make the call on whether youll live the rest of your years with joy and peace, or with fear, guilt, anger, and sadness. Life goes on either way.

I want to talk about the tone of this book, which may seem unusual for one about grief! At times, Spirits guidance will swing from tough love to compassion to ridiculous optimism, and I need you to go with me on this. When I channel souls, this is how they approach the healing processin a frank but mostly warm and positive way. To Spirits mind, death has ended their lives but shouldnt end yours. Your ability to cope with grief is seen as a challenge that will make you stronger, wiser, and more capable than before. It will teach you lessons that grow your soul. It will help you grasp how important love is, to move ahead with positivity, and to appreciate those around you. So I dont want you to ever think Im being flip or insensitive, or underestimating your pain based on how I present Spirits POV, because thats not the case. And while Spirits words are sometimes hard for me to say, I deliver them with faith and ask that you hear them with faith too. Spirit tells us what we need, not what we wantand its all blessed by God.

Good Grief s chapters are written to be read in order, with the hope that they will echo your grief process, but by no means is that necessary. Because everyone grieves differently, and our emotions bounce around like a wild kid in a bouncy castle, feel free to jump to a chapter that feels more in tune with what youre experiencing at the timeif, and only if, you promise to eventually read what you skipped. Spirit wants you to absorb the entire book because even if a chapter topic doesnt seem to hit home at one point, it will at another. There are thirty-one chapters total, so pace yourself. You might even want to work on this over the course of a year, averaging a chapter every week and a half or sobut again, your timeline is up to you. Spirit just asks that you dont complete the book in one sitting. We want you to consume, savor, and digest it until youre good and full.