Bender Michele - Silver hair: say goodbye to the dye and let your natural light shine

Silver Hair

Say Goodbye to the Dye and Let Your Natural Light Shine!

Lorraine Massey with Michele Bender

Workman Publishing New York

In loving memory of Don Massey, Peter Workman, and David Freidson. And for my family: Kaih, Shey, Dylan, Veronica, Venaih, and Silas

L. M.

To Lily and Jonathan

M. B.

Contents

How letting the real hue shine through your hair will boost your confidence, better match your skin tone, and save you time and money

How to grow out the dye naturally, without any chemical assistance, and maintain a good look

How to use these techniques to transition to your natural hue with minimal drama

How sophisticated streaks of silverboth natural and imposedcan be your look or a step toward going totally silver

Grow a little, cut a lothow a short cut speeds up the process

Dye your hair silver for fun or to assist in transitioning to natural silver

Hair care to keep your silver tones vibrant

Chapter one

The Glories of Being Silver:

Your True Color

Silver/gray/snow-white hair is here to stay.

T ake one look around your office, gym, school, supermarket, subway, mall, etc., and youll see that silver is the new black. And blonde. And brown.

Many celebrities have proudly sported silver hair for years, such as Jamie Lee Curtis, Emmylou Harris, Bonnie Raitt, and Helen Mirren. But whats new is that its not just the over-forty crowd who craves this hair color. There are young women who went silver early and have decided to ditch the dye and accept the gift nature gave them. One gorgeous example is the fashion features director of British Vogue, Sarah Harris, whose lovely silver locks are as chic as she is. Then youve got the young A-listers who have dyed their hair silver to look glam. Gwen Stefani, Miley Cyrus, Lady Gaga, Rihanna, Kelly Osbourne, Kylie Jenner, Nicole Richie, Pink, and Rita Ora, among others, have strolled the red carpet and appeared in magazines with silver, slate, and snow-white locks. And their twenty- and thirtysomething fans are following suit. Yes, theyre actually dyeing to be silver! Just think. Women are spending time and money to get the gorgeous color you may have right there on top of your head, even if its currently undercover. I mean under color.

Sarah Harris, British Vogue

I attribute some of this silver hair envy to the animated Disney film Frozen and the gorgeous frosty locks belonging to Elsa, one of the main characters. The princess of Arendelle is a powerful woman who reveals a modern image of what its like to go silver, and people of all ages have taken note: Silver can be unique and beautiful. Other young women Ive talked to cite Game of Thrones as their mane inspiration because of the white-haired character Daenerys Targaryen.

There are online tutorials on Frozen inspired hair color, Twitter hashtags (like #grannyhair), and articles proclaiming that gray has gone glam. I couldnt agree more. Think about it: Silver is a precious metal. Its a treasure, just like your natural hair color!

Kylie Jenner

Gwen Stefani

Rita Ora

Despite its recent popularity, silver/gray/snow-white hair is not just a trend. Its here to stay. The silver hair movement is very similar to the curly hair movement. For years, ringlets, corkscrews, and waves were considered the ugly ducklings of the hair world, viewed as aberrations to be tamed and flattened within an inch of their natural lives rather than a beautiful part of nature. Any curly girl who went to the salon got the obviously you dont want those curls attitude from the stylist, who assumed that she longed for a blow-fry to straighten her locks. For years I went through that as well, and when I finally saw how damaging it wasboth to my hair and my psyche I was inspired to write Curly Girl: The Handbook. Today, more and more women not only embrace their curls but revel in them, because their curls are part of their unique selves. Women with silver hair, no matter how many or how few strands they have, experience something similar when their hair care consultants, as well as friends and family, assume the appearance of silver means its time to color up. But embracing your natural hair is about youno one else. Its about loving what Mother Nature intended for you, the real you. Or, I should say, the real hue!

Emilia Clarke, Game of Thrones

In more than three decades as a hairstylist, Ive talked to countless women who want to grow out their dyed hair and who talk longingly about getting out of the coloring cycle. Then something stops them. Many color their hair by default, because theres a stigma surrounding being naturally silver. We have been conditioned to believe that silver strands mean that youre old. But your hair is not the problem. And your hair is not what ages you. The first issue is mind over (gray) matter. I truly believe that old is just a word and that a great attitude is ageless. If youre active, energetic, and still engaged in lifes wonders, then you naturally project a more youthful aura, regardless of your hair color. The same is true if you dive inside and get to know yourself a bit more. My grandma used to say, If you dont go within, you go without. You can have the most beautiful things in the world, have your hair tinted a gorgeous shade, and perhaps get a nip or a tuck. But grasping for outside things to make you happy wont last for long. Doing the inside work and being comfortable and confident in your own skin gives you an ageless light that shines outward. In essence, everyone around you benefits from you being happy and feeling empowered. Your glorious silver hair is and can be a part of that!

Emmylou Harris

The Essential Difference Between Letting Yourself Go and Letting Go

Some women worry that going silver tells the world that youre throwing in the towel and not taking care of yourself. But theres a difference between letting yourself go and letting go. The former means you arent taking care of yourself, inside or out. The latter means youre not living by someone elses ideas of what they think you should look like. In fact, many women whove embraced their silver strands say theyre actually reevaluating lifes essentials and taking better care of themselves by staying fit, getting the right amount of rest, eating healthy, clearing clutter that doesnt serve them, and better managing stress.