Tim Hawkins - Diary of a Jackwagon

THE JACKWAGON BANDWAGON

Tim Hawkins is not right in the head, and neither are you because you picked up this book. If you want to feel more normal, read this and laugh at him. I dared Tim to write this book, taunting him that he was only capable of writing 140 characters at time. Good job, Tim! Homeschooling works! (Please check my spelling. I went to public school.)

KERRI POMAROLLI, COMEDIAN, AUTHOR OF
Moms Night Out and Other Things I Miss

Thanks to Tim, I see that the Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep kids prayer is more horrifying than anything Alice Cooper ever wrote. Tim is that guy who says everything youve ever thought but were never clever enough to come up with yourself. Ridiculously hilarious.

SEAN COLELLI, ALICE COOPERS SOLID ROCK
TEEN CENTER, PHOENIX, ARIZONA

Tims refreshingly honest and family-friendly take on the many humorous parts of life will have you laughing from start to finish. Our family couldnt put it down! Youll be reading Diary of a Jackwagon out loud for the whole family to enjoy.

RICK SANTORUM, PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE, FORMER
US SENATOR, COAUTHOR OF Bellas Gift

I first met Tim and saw him perform in 2008, and Ive been a raving fan ever since. Tims insights are dead-center accurate, and his stand-up comedy is cleverly hilarious. I know that like me youll find this book entertaining, perceptive, and too much fun to only read once.

C. NORWOOD DAVIS, CFO, THE JOHN MAXWELL COMPANY

Diary of a Jackwagon is comedy caffeine in print. With an amazing goofball wit, Hawkins liberates our inner Jr. Higher, gives a loud raspberry to our personal Pharisee, and provides much needed exercise to those long dormant belly-laugh muscles. I plan to send a copy of this book to every humorless sourpuss and get off my lawn acquaintance I know.

RICK BUNDSCHUH, COAUTHOR OF Soul Surfer, KAUAI, HAWAII

Ive never seen a performer command a stage like Tim Hawkins. Tim goes from 0 to 60 lightning fast, and the audience stays with him from the opener through the finale. He is quite simply one of the most talented comedians in any genre out there today. From parody songs to stand-up bits to audience interaction, hes phenomenal. And Im a fan.

MICHAEL W. SMITH, RECORDING ARTIST

Diary of a Jackwagon takes us deeper into the thoughts of a man who finds the funny in yoga pants, Snickaloafs, and Noahs Ark painted in our kids bedrooms. I put Tim in the same league with Dave Barry and Erma Bombeck as an American humorist. In a world full of overused superlatives: Not reading this book? THAT is the worst!

MIKE ALLEY, 95.1 SHINE-FM AND 48LIVE PRODUCTIONS

When we first booked Tim for a concert at our church, a client testimonial on his website warned that attendees might pee their pants due to laughter. A vulgar endorsement, right? As a physician, I was pleased that there was indeed an increased demand for incontinence medications after the show. After reading Diary of a Jackwagon, Tims comedy will once again be very good for my business.

BRANDON WEBB M.D., FAMILY PHYSICIAN, LINCOLN, NEBRASKA

Tim may be low on blinker fluid, but his songs and jokes make our family laugh till we cry. All hail Mr. Yoga Pants!

KIRK CAMERON, ACTOR, PRODUCER

If you think that great comedy always comes from a tortured soul, Tim Hawkins will prove you wrong. I laughed till I passed out reading this book. I have had the pleasure of personally meeting some of the comedic greats including Steve Martin, Bill Hicks, and Sam Kinison. Tim is without reservation one of the finest comedians of our generation.

JOHN BLEDSOE, SPEAKER, ESTATE PLANNER,
AUTHOR OF The Gospel of Roth

Im proud to join in the Brotherhood of Jackwagons everywhere! In concert and in this book, I laugh so hard at Tim and think As a husband, dad, and everyday guy, Tim sure is some kind of jackwagon. About two heartbeats later it occurs to me.... Oh no! Hes talking about ME!

TIM HATTRICK, The Tim and Willy Radio Show, PHOENIX, ARIZONA

Tim has a refreshing take on everyday moments that make you approach life with a more playful lens. If you need a good laugh, this is the book to pick up and read.

MILES MCPHERSON, SENIOR PASTOR, ROCK
CHURCH, SAN DIEGO, CALIFORNIA

What if we could get inside the mind of Tim Hawkins? At home with family and on the tour bus, Hawkins is constantly capturing the stuff that makes people laugh.

TIM DETELLIS, PRESIDENT, NEW MISSIONS, ORLANDO, FLORIDA

Tim and I must be related, I thought. Then I saw him perform in concert for nearly 5,000 people and realized something: Tim makes everyone feel that way. Im grateful that he has finally written a book so that I can get a Tim fix whenever I need it.

GARY DIXON, EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR, NORTHWEST
MINISTRY CONFERENCE, SEATTLE, WASHINGTON

Tim connects with his audience like most public people never do. I wondered how Tims stand-up style would translate to the written word. Answer? Its absolutely delightful and hysterical. You can enjoy this book bit by bit or all in one sitting. And please, dont test out any of the lyrics from Things You Dont Say to Your Wife. Take my word for it.

KEN DAVIS, COMEDIAN, AUTHOR OF Fully Alive

Tim has an uncanny way of putting his slightly skewed twist on our everyday routines to create comedy genius that connects with us all. Generally, I shy away from any book that I cant color, but I made an exception for Jackwagon. I may never pick up a crayon again.

DAN RUPPLE, PRODUCER, WRITER, FOUNDING MEMBER
OF ISAAC AIR FREIGHT COMEDY TROUPE

Tim is on the short list of men my children like more than me. He absolutely has given our whole family countless hours of entertainment with his stand-up comedy and songs like Chick-fil-A. Plus, we cant figure out if he looks more like Dale Earnhardt Jr. or the guy from Sister Wives.

BOB STURM, The Bob and Dan Radio Show,
SPORTSRADIO 1310 THE TICKET, DALLAS, TEXAS

While reading these pages I felt guilty laughing, like when the kid falls on his face in the school play. Its sad but its true and its funny... so I laughed. I keep wondering if Tim will snap out of it one day. This book is comedy gold!

PETE BRISCOE, SENIOR PASTOR, BENT TREE
BIBLE FELLOWSHIP, CARROLLTON, TEXAS

When you read Diary of a Jackwagon, you expect Tim to be nuts. And then you realize he is. The way he links thoughts together is brilliant. Tim actually puts into words what many others (some of whom are confined to an institution) are unwilling or unable to say. You absolutely must read this book and catch a glimpse of how Tim thinks. Its a bit scary!

BILL GRAENING, DIRECTOR, ALIVE FESTIVAL

Funny, hilarious, ridiculous are the first three words that come to mind. I have never laughed so long or so many times. Read and get ready.

JOHNNY HUNT, SENIOR PASTOR, FBC WOODSTOCK (GEORGIA) AND
FORMER PRESIDENT OF THE SOUTHERN BAPTIST CONVENTION

There is a guitar-string thin line between lunatic jester and genius saint. Jackwagon is a joy to read as Tim dances on that line. What C. S. Lewis did for the formation of critical thinking in the faith, Tim Hawkins does to allow us to see the hilarious side of God in reality. If youve always wanted to believe God actually created laughter, this book is a MUST read.

KENN KINGTON, COMEDIAN, SPEAKER, FOUNDER
OF ULTIMATE COMEDY THEATRE

There are some people you just connect with instantly. Tim Hawkins is one of those people. I found myself laughing out loud reading Diary of a Jackwagon.

DAVE NOWAK, EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR,
LAUGH ALL NIGHT CONCERTS

We are made in the image of God, but deep down we all know that the gene pool was contaminated by the time we were born. Thats why the best comedy makes us laugh at ourselves. There is probably not a weirder group of people than Christians. I should know. I lead them. The beautiful thing about Christians laughing at ourselves is that it helps us lighten up and not act better than the rest of the world. I can only imagine Jesus reading this book. He is laughing so hard. I imagine a snort.