Nevi Letcher - Mind Your Own Business

A nd so it interrupts me again, my inner voice Not playing nicely today. You think this is the right decision? it taunts. This may be the end of everything all your achievements, the many sacrifices, the passion you inject into everything you do. You have worked so diligently to get to the top.

The world starts to close in on me and I find my eyes brimming, blurring my vision, my throat constricting, making my breathing uneven. The salty liquid gives way like a dam wall has burst, my thoughts yanked in all directions. All the time, this niggling thought courses through my head: This is a traumatic decision. Rather stay where you are, earning a great salary, where you have things going for you.

I conjure up an image of three people meeting in a garden under the oak tree. The scene is surreal. Everything is beautiful except that it is all happening in my brain. One of the three is as negative as the dark of the night. His voice cracks and he advises against the move. You will fail, he says. You dont know how to do this and will look like a fool. This decision is for people who know the ropes of being an entrepreneur, who know what theyre doing.

The second voice is bathed in sunlight. What a beautiful day! Have you seen the daffodils? You have what it takes to get this going you have the ability, the exposure, the poise, great communication skills and tenacity. Start this race and we will see you on the winners podium.

The third voice is both lazy and reckless at the same time. Look here, girl, this is a huge sacrifice an enormous task, make no bones about it. Why put yourself through the agony? You have it all already enjoy it.

When all three have offered their opinions, they turn towards me for my verdict. All three responses have shaken me to my core, but only one can move me past this feeling.

Now, let me decide. I feel the tightening of my diaphragm. It feels like I am speaking, but there is no sound. The beat of my heart is like a game of hopscotch: on one foot, hop over square one to square two, skip my marker and land on two feet and, just as fast, get back onto one foot.

On autopilot, I retrieve my phone and access the number from my Favourites list. The call is answered on the second ring. Hi, love, was wondering whether youre on your way to the airport yet.

My reply follows, feeble and lame. Hi, will be leaving in a few minutes. I cant be long, but need to tell you something really important.

You dont sound okay. Are you sick? I feel sick, but not the sort you are thinking of. You know that thing we always talk about ? Ive decided today is the day.

Nevi, seriously now, stop talking in riddles. Whats going on? Did everything not go well with Guinness World Records ? Someone say something to upset you?

Actually, we got the record and all went really well. I couldnt have asked for a better result. It actually got me thinking, Where to from here? and Ive decided that Im going to resign. There, I said it.

But there is no sense of relief. No fear, only uneasiness. This statement is the jolt that I needed to know that I am finally venturing into the unknown, but one that I know I have the determination to overcome. If anything, my words give me the courage to press on.

Can we chat about this when you get home? My decision is made I know its a scary and unpredictable one.

The words hit like a ton of bricks crashing down on me from the open sky and, quite honestly, it hurts a lot. Not a dull headache, but an intense grief, offering no relief or direction.

I confidently click Send on the email I have been staring at for the last hour. Its official My resignation letter will soon be read.

This day will be remembered forever, the day when unexpected events yanked me from my familiar routine, nudged me out of my comfort zone and allowed me to answer big questions about what matters most and what my life is really worth. Its no wonder that many of us are constantly rethinking our careers. We all try to balance the need to have a healthy foundation to sustain our basic survival against the desire to create and trial something new.

***

Good choices are made not on the journey, but in a moment, at a fork in the road. I am forever grateful for the decision that I made on the day that I reached the pinnacle of my career.

The decision to become an entrepreneur wow, that sounds great! My brain was ready to respond to a new environment and navigate unchartered territory.

Success seems to be connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they dont quit.

Conrad Hilton, American businessman and founder of the Hilton Hotels chain